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I didn’t know whether to freak out or start laughing hysterically. I wanted to do both. Neither seemed strong enough a reaction, though.
“I’m really sorry,” the server said again.
The man’s look was a mixture of apology and restraint. I wondered if he wanted to break out laughing as well, but protocol wouldn’t allow it. In truth, I wouldn’t have minded.
“Alright then,” I said, trying to gather up the last scraps of my dignity. “I guess I’ll take the check.”
Awkwardly, the man fumbled with his server book. Eventually he tore one out and laid it gently on the table.
“Again, I—”
“Forget it,” I told him. “It’s not the weirdest date I’ve ever been on, anyway.” Now I did laugh, and it felt surprisingly good. “Not by a longshot.”
His eyes went a little wider at that, which brought an even bigger smile to my face. The server smiled back, albeit weakly, then hurried off.
“Fuck you, Chris,” I said, reaching across the table and toasting my date with his own beer. I was suddenly more determined than ever to salvage the night.
“Fuck you and the mountain bike you rode in on.”
~ 2 ~
ARIANA
GreatSkates was the type of place that looked totally closed down, at least from the outside. The half-moon-shaped building was comprised of mostly dilapidated and crumbling cinder-block, with a roof that was patched in so many places it looked like an art project. The paint was chipping away in layers, and the sign’s electronic letters flickered, noisily. The parking lot was cracked and pitted, with entire swaths of grass growing through the once-sealed asphalt.
Finally, if the building appeared to be tilting to one side, that’s because it was. Engineers had determined the west side of the foundation was sinking at least a half-inch per year, which meant that no matter how much lipstick you slapped on this pig, GreatSkates’ days were ultimately numbered.
“Axel?” I inquired, on the way through the door. Two hockey players in red-and-black jerseys nodded and pointed. “He’s over there, feeding the puck-bunnies.”
The first player laughed, while his friend gave him an admonishing shove. I smiled to let them both know it was alright.
“Thanks.”
They shuffled off, still wearing their skates, and I turned left at what used to be the snack bar. Once upon a time, GreatSkates had been a roller rink — and a glorious one at that. I’d seen photos of it back in its heyday, and by the smiles on the faces of the 1980’s mullet-wearing, high-haired, neon-wearing crowd, it had apparently been the place to be.
Sometime in the early 2000’s it finally closed down, only to be bought and refitted as a flea-market venue. When that eventually failed it was left abandoned and rotting… at least until a few fiscally reckless investors bought the building, gutted it down to the cement walls, and turned it into an ice rink that was as much nostalgia as it was actual profit.
“Axel! AXEL!”
Two girls bumped me on either side as they went flying by, bounding over to the boards. And there, at the edge of the ice, was Axel. There were three other girls surrounding him, and a fourth had ventured onto the ice with nothing but a pair of flats on. He was holding her up with one arm, and balancing his helmet on his stick with the other.
I stopped short on the dirty, threadbare carpet to admire my friend since the seventh grade. Axel was of course ridiculously hot and handsome, with model good looks and a panty-dropping smile. His thick brown hair and stunning blue eyes captivated anyone who saw him, but it was his charisma and charm that really sealed the deal. Simply put, Axel had an energy that could not be explained. His voice, his mannerisms, his killer eyelashes — all of these things were wrapped up in a cool confidence that made everyone want to be around him, guys and girls alike.
The man was a god, at least amongst hockey players. Not to mention his many, many female fans.
“Axel, AXEL!” I mocked, using my best teasing voice. “Can I have your autograph?”
The girls surrounding him gave me a dirty look as I approached. Especially the one clinging to him on the ice.
“Or could you maybe sign these?”
Laughingly, I pushed my tits together and sauntered over. I had some really great tits, actually. Three of the girls wrinkled their noses at me, including a bleach-blonde with a skirt so tight she could barely even move.
When Axel saw me his whole face lit up. In hilarious contrast, his fans all wore insta-frowns.
“What the hell are you doing here?” he asked cheerfully.
“Coming to find you, so you could take me to dinner.”
