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“That’s not an answer.”
“Yeah, well.” I shrugged and tossed the bag of frozen veg on the counter, before turning to face her, grimacing when my eyes landed on the bloodstained towel in her hands. “It’s all I have.”
“I need you to keep your head down for a few days,” she whispered, eyes full of guilt. “Just stay out of his way until he calms down. Don’t tell the boys about Aoife. Don’t tell Shannon. Just…just give me some time to work on your father, okay?”
“Are you serious?”
“Joey, it’s complicated.”
This time when she reached for me, I took a step backwards. “It’s always going to be him. You’re always going to choose him.”
“I’m not choosing him. I’m trying to keep my family together.” She took another step toward me, and I took three more away from her. “Joey, please.”
“Got anything for the pain?” I asked, unwilling to continue a conversation that would end with me being blamed for everything. “My face is killing me.”
“There’s paracetamol in the cupboard.”
“Mam.”
“No, Joey.”
“I’m asking ya to help me,” I bit out, feeling the desperate hunger for relief steadily clawing its way up my throat. “Please, Mam.”
“Joey.”
“Please,” I ground out. “I’m in pain.”
“I told you that I have paracetamol in the cupboard.”
“Please,” I choked out, resisting the urge to scream, Fuck your paracetamol. “Just this once and I’ll never ask again.”
“Joey.”
“I’ll beg if I have to.”
“Don’t beg.”
“Please, Mam. Fucking please.”
“Fine.” Tears filled her eyes. “Just this once.”
“What do you have?”
She sniffled before whispering, “Clonazepam.”
Thank fuck. I sagged in relief. “Where?”
Her face contorted in pain and she whimpered, “My handbag,” before walking over to the table and retrieving her bag that was hanging off the back of her chair. “You can have one and that’s it.”
“I need more than one, Mam,” I replied, trailing after her. “Please. One won’t do shit for me.”
“These are very strong.” Sniffling, she unscrewed the cap on her prescription bottle and tipped two C2s into my outstretched hand. “Don’t ever ask me to do this again.”
“I won’t,” I replied, even though we both knew it was a lie.
62
My Heart Is Inside Her
