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Running faster than I ever had in my entire life, I sprinted the rest of the way home, with my heart gunning in my chest and my mind freewheeling into overdrive.
It’s okay.
It won’t be that bad.
Just breathe.
I could see Ollie at the front door when I rounded the garden, waving wildly at me to hurry. I knew he was screaming and tears were spilling down his cheeks, but I couldn’t make out a word of it.
The only sound in my head was the thundering roar of my pulse in my ears, as I staggered through the front door and followed a trail of blood into the kitchen. It took a moment for my brain to absorb what my eyes were seeing.
Blood smeared on the kitchen tiles.
Shannon limp on the floor.
Tadhg covering her body with his.
Blood on his face.
Mam standing in the kitchen screaming.
And him.
Him.
Standing in the middle of the carnage was our father.
My gear bag slipped off my shoulder, and the noise it made when it clattered to the floor seemed to awaken me from the trancelike daze I was suffocating in. My throat felt like it had closed up. My heart shriveled up and died in my chest.
My gaze flicked to Shannon once more, and the pain I felt when I took in the sight of her mangled body was too much to take. It was all too fucking much.
“You fucking bastard!” The words tore from my lips like a battle cry, and I felt myself moving, barreling straight for him, my heart demanding vengeance. “You dirty fucking animal.”
“Joey, wait!”
I didn’t wait. I couldn’t.
“Hit me.” Taking him to the floor with more force than I knew I was capable of, I slammed his head against the hard tiles before quickly climbing back up and dragging the worthless piece of shit with me. “Come on, asshole. Hit someone your own fucking size.”
“Joey, please don’t—”
“Shut the fuck up,” I roared, losing my fucking mind when she tried to speak to me. My sister was lying in a heap on the floor, and instead of going to her, Mam was trying to protect him. “You are the most pathetic excuse for a mother that ever walked the earth.”
Spitting piss and fire, he reared back and socked me in the jaw with his beefy fist. “You little shit.”
“Did you see that?” I demanded, not even feeling the pain now as I glared at our mother. I knew it should hurt—his fist was like a goddamn bulldozer—but adrenaline was flooding my system, giving me strength I had no right to possess. “Did you see him hit me?”
“I’ll put manners on you yet, boy,” Dad slurred, throwing another punch, but this time he missed, giving me ample opportunity to return the gesture.
“Can’t you see what he’s doing to your children?” My fist connected with the bridge of his nose, causing blood to spray all over the both of us as he collapsed in a heap on his ass. “Are you fucking blind?”
“Joey, stop,” I heard my sister strangle out, but it was too late for words. “He’s not worth going to prison over.”
Because I couldn’t stop.
Not until I made him stop.
Forever.
