AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“No.” She shook her head. “One hour at a time, remember? You’ve got another hour in you, Joe.”
“I’m dying here,” I admitted, shifting closer so that only she could hear me. “Help me.”
“I can’t,” she choked out, tightening her hold on my hand. “You can do this, Joe. I know you can. You’ve done it before. Just let the poison seep out of your system, baby, and you’ll feel so much better.”
“I’m telling you that I’m going to fucking die if I don’t get something,” I strangled out. “I can feel it.” I blew out a strained breath. “My heart’s going to burst in my chest.”
“Then we’ll leave,” she tried to soothe. “We’ll go home.”
“If I get off this chair, it’s not home I’m heading to,” I forced myself to be honest and tell her. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
“No, no, no,” she replied. “Don’t be sorry because you’re still hanging in there.”
I wasn’t. I was seconds away from peeling the skin off my bones. The urge was too fierce. The need was too strong. The hunger was too consuming.
“I can’t do this, Molloy.”
“Yes, you can.”
“No, I really can’t.”
“A smoke will take the edge off, lad,” Alec interjected in a rarely tender tone of voice, as he placed a hand on my shoulder. “Say the word and I’ll get you sorted.”
Molloy’s eyes flicked to me, and after a moment of hesitation, she reluctantly nodded. “Help him.”
I was out of my chair and moving in an instant, unraveling faster than I ever had before, as the cravings tormenting my body caused my stomach to roil in protest.
“That’s it, lad,” Al coaxed when we reached the back of the P.E. hall, and I unceremoniously puked my guts up. “You get that shit out and I’ll spark us up some grade A weed, my friend.”
“Fuck my life,” I groaned between wretches as I hemorrhaged bile and poison. It physically hurt to breathe. Every time my heart pumped, the blood rushing through my veins burned and scalded me. “I’m dying.”
“You’re not dying. You just can’t go cold turkey on this,” my friend coaxed, placing a neatly rolled joint between my fingers. “Take a hit, lad. It’ll help with the sickness.”
Shaking violently, I took a deep drag, filling my lungs to the point of pain, and then I held it there until dizziness engulfed me.
“That’s it,” Alec said, giving my shoulder a supportive squeeze. “Sit your ass down, lad, and just soak it in.”
Trembling, I managed to sink down on the footpath at the back of the hall and take another hit. “Fuck,” I said, slowly exhaling a cloud of smoke.
“You know I’m the last person to judge you, because God knows I’m a fair bit of a fuckup in my own right,” he said, lowering himself down to sit beside me. “But you need help, Joe.”
“Al, please, lad, I can’t hear this right now.”
“You’re going to have to, Joe. You’ve got a girl in there and a baby on the way, and I would be a piss-poor friend if I didn’t step in and at least try to talk some sense into you,” he continued. “The shit you’ve been messing around with. Heroin? People don’t just stop cold turkey. If they could, then there wouldn’t be any need for methadone clinics and rehabilitation facilities. It’s serious, lad. And you don’t just walk away from people like Holland, either. You know this.”
“I don’t know what to do,” I admitted, feeling broken. “I know she needs me.”
“She’s still here, man,” he offered, nudging my shoulder with his. “She’s still holding out for you, which means there’s still hope. You’ve got a little family waiting on you to get better. You can get better, Joe, but you need to want it, lad. You need to fight.”
“I just… I don’t know if I have another fight in me,” I admitted quietly. “I’m so tired, Al. In the head. My mind is fucking weary.”
“Hey, stud.” Molloy’s familiar voice drifted through the air, causing everything inside of me to spring to attention. Appearing from the side of the P.E. hall, she sat on the wall opposite me, keeping her distance from the smoke. “Feeling better?”
Disgusted with myself for becoming this decrepit creature, I forced a small nod, while buckling under the weight of my shame.
“He’ll be grand,” Al was quick to interject in his usual jokester tone. “Lynchy here just needs to get back to basics.”
My phone decided to torment me in this moment by ringing loudly in my pocket. Taking another deep drag of smoke, I passed it to Alec and reached for my phone.
