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“Yes, you were!”
“No, I fucking wasn’t. I just couldn’t get—” Snapping my mouth shut, I shook my head and forced myself to hold my tongue.
Do not fight with girls, I reminded myself. You’ll never win. They’ll twist your words.
“You weren’t giving me what I wanted,” she continued to torment me by saying. “You weren’t giving me enough attention! All those award ceremonies and balls in Dublin last year and never once did you invite me to go,” she hissed. “You never wanted me there.”
“Because you were never my girlfriend,” I countered, throwing her earlier words back at her.
“Because you never asked me to be your girlfriend, Johnny,” she spat out.
“No, Bella, because you never wanted me,” I shot back. “You only wanted the shiny part of my life. The fame. You were never interested in the real part. The real me.”
“That’s not true!” she argued.
“Why don’t you just tell it straight, Bella?” I hissed, losing control of my temper. “You fucked off with Ryan because you thought I wasn’t going to be match fit. You saw I was out on injury, you thought I wouldn’t make it back in time for the summer campaign, so you went after the next best thing just to be safe.”
She blushed.
I knew it!
“Ask me now,” she urged, closing the space between us. “Ask me to do all those things and I will.”
“I don’t want to ask you,” I bit out, unhooking her arms from around my neck.
“Johnny, come on.” She sighed. “Don’t be like this.”
“Go on back to Cormac,” I deadpanned, thoroughly disgusted. “And pray he makes it up the ranks in the Academy so he can take you to all those fancy awards parties you want to attend. He’s your only shot at getting there now, Bella, because we’re done.”
“I was hurt, Johnny,” she strangled out. “I got with Cormac because I wanted to hurt you back.”
“Hurt me back?” I balked. “For what exactly? Getting injured? Being stuck on my back for weeks while you rode my friend behind my back? Messing up your chances of fancy fucking dinner parties?” I shook my head and sneered at her, regretting touching her with every fiber of my being. “Jesus, I’m an awful, inconsiderate bastard.”
“For ignoring me,” she hissed, cheeks turning pink. “For using me.”
“Me using you?” I balked. “Yeah, because that’s what was happening.”
“That’s how you made me feel, Johnny!”
“Then I’m sorry!” I snapped back, striving for patience in the eye of this girl-induced, mind-fucking shitstorm.
“You have to have feelings to be sorry, Johnny,” she retorted. “And you are heartless!”
Keep the head. Take it on the chin. And then get the hell away from her.
Inhaling a calming breath, I exhaled slowly before saying, “Bella, I am sorry if at any point I made you feel ignored or used. That was not my intention. I sincerely apologize for my lack of heart and feelings and wish you nothing but the best for all your future endeavors with my teammate. Now, if you don’t mind, I am tired of going around in circles with you and have actual shit to do.”
I moved for the door, but she grabbed my hand again, pulling me back.
“Wait—are you with someone else?” she demanded, squeezing my hand. “Is that what your problem is?” Her eyes widened. “Oh my god,” she exclaimed. “You are, aren’t you?”
Jesus. What the hell had I been thinking messing around with this girl?
“No, Bella, I’m not with anyone else.” Yanking my hand free, I shook my head and released a frustrated sigh. “But I’m not with you, either. And I won’t ever be with you again.”
“I’ve heard rumors, Johnny!” Bella pressed, ignoring my words. “About you and the new girl in third year. I heard you beat up Ronan McGarry because of her. And I saw that picture of you with her in the paper.”
“That’s none of your business,” I bit out through clenched teeth as I struggled to rein in my temper.
