AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I waggled my brows at the compliment. “Why, thank you.”
“You are,” she offered, tone serious as she reached up to trail a finger down my cheek. “You’re so pretty.”
“I’ve been told I have a certain boyish charm that chiseled abs and strong jawlines can’t absorb.”
“And silly,” she slurred. “Super silly.”
“I love you.” The words flew out of my mouth of their own accord. Forcing a smile, I gave her cheek a playful squeeze before adding, “My little snuckle-bunny.”
“Why thank you very much”—she paused to hiccup—“my little spud monkey.”
“Spud monkey?” I laughed. “That’s all you could come up with?”
“Yep.” She laughed and then quickly contorted in what looked like physical pain. “Oh god, no!”
“What?” I demanded, startled by her sudden switch in mood. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m so sad, Gerard.”
My heart seemed to both stop and speed up at the same time when those words came out of her mouth. “You’re sad?” Instantly, I had this primal urge to make it better. To make her happy. “Why are you sad, babe?”
“Ugh.” Groaning in discomfort, she covered her hands with her face and leaned forward. “Forget it.”
“Hey…hey, look at me, Claire.” Crouching down in front of her, I pried her hands away and forced her to look at me. “Talk to me.”
Her brown eyes locked on mine, hazy and unfocused for a long beat before finding traction in our stare. “Because.”
“Because?” I coaxed, still cupping her face.
“Because you don’t love me the right way,” she whispered, leaning into my touch. “The way I need you to love me.” She reached up and covered my hands with hers. “The way I love you.”
If I thought my heart was breaking earlier, it fucking shattered in my chest when I heard her vulnerability.
“I do,” I replied, roughly clearing my throat. “I love you in so many ways.”
“Then why?” she slurred. “Why won’t you just kiss me?”
Because I’m terrified. “Claire.”
Exhaling a shaky breath, she leaned in close.
“Don’t do it,” I begged when her mouth was a hairsbreadth from mine.
“Don’t do what?”
“You know what,” I strangled out, resting my brow against hers as my chest heaved and my body trembled with a mixture of lust and sheer fucking terror. “It’ll change everything.”
“Would that be such a bad thing?”
How could I explain it to her when I couldn’t explain it to myself? The desire to feel affection and the urge to run from it both in one breath. Fuck, maybe Mam was right, and I needed more sessions with Anne because I sure as shit wasn’t winning at life tonight.
“Yes,” I finally admitted, heart bucking wildly in my chest. “For you.”
“I can’t wait forever, Gerard,” she whispered, her tone laced with sadness as she slowly withdrew. “It hurts too much.”
Pain.
It was everywhere in this moment.
