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“I plaster walls,” I said, deadpan.
“No,” said my father. “You chase your dreams.”
“And abandon my kids to go study architecture as a mature student? I don’t think so, Dad.”
"You put your dreams on hold for those girls,” Dad pressed, clearly not giving up. “It was a huge sacrifice. But I've watched you grow because of it, Cole. I see the love you have for them them, regardless of how grumpy you pretend to be."
"It's no pretense. And of course I love them. I’d do anything for them. Which includes not running off to study architecture."
Dad let out a long sigh. “Listen, Cole. I know your dream was to become an architect. Okay? I get it. But have you looked inside your heart lately? I mean really looked. Are you sure your dreams haven’t changed at all?”
I shrugged. “My dream is to give the girls a good life.”
“They already have a good life,” said Dad. “Dream accomplished. What’s next?”
I shook my head. “It’s a lifelong mission, Dad. They want fancy stuff, vacations, gadgets—"
"All they want is you." He looked at me, eyes crinkled with laughter lines. “They’re lucky to have you, Cole. Everyone in this town is. You've turned Bluehaven Beach into a work of art."
I snorted.
"I mean it," he insisted. "The pier, the antique streetlamps, the store facades. Do you think an architect would have had this much impact on the town? And when your girls grow up, they might study elsewhere, maybe even leave home for a while. But I guarantee they'll want to come back because of the wonderful home you've made here.” He paused. “So. The girls are good. The town is good. What about you, son? What do you want?”
My heart thumped in my chest.
"I think you want Elara," said Dad, so simply that I almost dropped plaster all over the floor.
"No."
“It doesn’t matter, anyway," I said. “Elara's dreams are different to mine. She has a chance to make it big in New York, to find success and recognition. To do the things I never did."
"Maybe it's what she wants right now. But I guarantee you, it’s not what she needs.”
“And how do you know that?” I snapped, the anger bubbling up inside me. Dad was acting like we were in some goddamn romance novel. I had finished Small Town Sweethearts. It was the most unrealistic nonsense imaginable. Jax pushed the heroine away but then he had an epiphany out of nowhere and won her back. And of course, she forgave him for being an asshole.
When I finished the book, I got so mad I stormed down to the beach with it, ready to fling the damn thing into the ocean. But I didn't. I thought back to the day Elara had given the novel to me. She gave me so much more than just the book that day. She gave me peace.
I missed the person I was when I was with her. More relaxed. Less uptight. Kinder to myself. Better in every way.
I wished there was some way to get her back.
"I'm not what she needs, Dad. I'll never be good enough for her." With that, I dragged the last of the plaster over the wall. "Finish the skim for me, old man. I've got to go get the girls."
***
It was just a couple of minutes to Stephanie’s. When I arrived, my father's words were still ringing in my ears.
I think you want Elara.
As I pulled up outside Stephanie's house, I noticed her silhouette visible through the front window. As I stepped out of my truck, she opened the door and greeted me with a half-hearted smile.
"Hey, Cole. The girls are almost ready.”
"No probs. I can wait." I leaned up against the truck.
Stephanie had dark rings under her eyes and she wore an old sweat top that I knew she wouldn't normally let me see her in. “Everything okay?”
"You know." She breathed in deeply and wiped her eyes. "Bryce is away in Switzerland for a few days, so I've been alone with the girls. I forgot how hard it is."
