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Ouch.
I clenched my jaw, trying to fight the emotion bubbling up inside me.
"Don't worry about asking, girls, it's very sweet of you,” I managed. “But like your dad said, we're just good friends." Did I sound convincing? I didn’t feel convincing.
"And she's leaving Bluehaven Beach soon," Cole added, taking another bite of his dog. "So don't get too used to having her around."
The girls' faces fell.
My chest tightened with a dizzying mix of emotions. It was true—I'd be gone soon. But the thought of saying goodbye to these precious girls and the man who had come to mean so much to me was almost too much to bear.
Later, as we walked back home, Rhea slipped her tiny hand into mine. "I wish you weren't going back to New York, Elara," she said softly.
"I'm sorry I have to go," I replied, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.
"Guess what? I played ball with the boys at school. Told them there's no such thing as boy stuff and girl stuff, just stuff!" Rhea announced proudly.
"That's great, Rhe.”
“I decided I’m gonna do my jujitsu grading.”
“Good for you. I’m impressed.”
She sighed. "You're so easy to talk to. When I talk to Mom or Dad they're always all worried and stuff. But you're just . . . I don't know. Calm, I guess."
"You know your mom and dad might seem worried, but that doesn't mean you can't talk to them. They love you so much."
"I know, I know." A pause. "You know why I'll be sad when you leave? Because Daddy's always happy when you're around.”
I ruffled her hair, fighting back tears.
As we arrived back home, the setting sun bathed the empty trailer park in a warm golden glow.
Cole glanced over. "Join us for dinner?"
I hesitated, my heart pounding. As much as I craved more time with him and the girls, I knew I had to start creating a bit of distance between us. Today had made that crystal clear.
I wasn't Cole's girlfriend so I had to stop acting like it. I didn’t want leaving this place to be any harder than it already would be.
"Thanks, but I think I'll pass," I said, forcing a smile. "I've got to take Anthony for a walk and I have to prep for my trip."
"Sure, no problem." His voice was steady, but disappointment flickered in his eyes. "Take care, Elara. And thanks for winning that monstrously huge panda, by the way."
Chuckling, I replied, "No worries. Good luck finding a place for it."
The girls' laughter and shrieks drifted from inside. Cole glanced over his shoulder, then pressed a quick kiss to my cheek. "It'll be good to see you Sunday after I drop the girls off. Before work starts up again Monday."
"Maybe," I hedged. "I've got to prepare for the interview."
"It's not for another week, though."
"Still not long. And I don't really know what I'm doing."
He nodded. "Right. It's the most important thing now. Let me know if you find the time."
Damn, it hurt so much.
I went into the trailer and found Anthony asleep on the couch.
