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It hurt like hell to step back, but there would be no moving forward if Al kept pushing. And she wanted to move forward—with CC. She wanted to find out if the spark that had grown brighter the past month could lead to the raging inferno they’d only glimpsed in a few stolen moments.
She gave CC space and rested back against the front of the desk. “You have to know, CC, this is not how I wanted things to go.”
Know, maybe; believe was a harder sell, judging by the anger that morphed into pain in CC’s eyes and voice. “I trusted you. And now I may lose two of my best friends because of that mistake.”
Al wanted to cross the office and wrap CC in her arms. Wanted to assure her that no one would blame her and that she was still one of the best and brightest attorneys she’d ever worked with. Wanted to tell her that while the Dotsons might take what they want and leave, she wouldn’t. Instead, she curled her fingers around the desk’s edge and forced herself to stay still. To give CC the time and space she needed. “I’m sorry, CC. Truly.”
CC’s “Me too” was a fraction of her earlier outburst... and exponentially more devastating.
Chapter Seventeen
Thank fuck for eggnog, Christmas trees, and first cousins once removed. CC’s parents were so distracted by Colby’s heavy-handed pours and their cousins’ kids that CC was able to use the giant tree as cover and sneak out of the white elephant exchange unnoticed. She swung through the kitchen, refreshed her mug of mulled wine, then ventured outside.
Her childhood home was a modest midseventies rancher that, like most California homes, no longer had a modest price tag. Her parents had used the mountain of home equity to periodically update and renovate, most recently the large backyard patio that overlooked the golf course between their neighborhood and the luxury oceanfront resort.
The new trellis over the patio table was draped with fragrant garland and twinkling white lights, and the firepit that bisected the outdoor space still burned from earlier when the adults had gathered outside for drinks. It was cooler now, but not so cold that CC’s sweater, plus the wine and fire, weren’t enough to keep her toasty.
If only her insides were as warm. After burning red-hot with Al the night of the firm holiday party, a chill had settled over her since Thursday. It had started in her belly when she’d first heard the parking garage news, had worked its way into her chest as she’d argued with Al at Dram, then had wrapped around her heart as she’d given Jen and Etienne the fuller picture later that evening. They’d been confused, conflicted, and hurt most of all. There had been no Friday signing. The parties would touch base again on Tuesday after the holiday and decide whether to proceed.
In the days since, CC had received several texts from Al, the last vibrating mid-dinner, a Merry Christmas Eve message. CC had left it on read like she had the others, not yet ready to engage, not even sure what she would say. She was hurt too, and all the Christmas cheer in the world wasn’t going to fix her wounded hope.
The patio door opened behind her, and the familiar squeak of Crocs was a dead giveaway. If that hadn’t been enough, the dessert plate that appeared in front of her, two slices of pumpkin roll on either side of a chocolate one, would have confirmed her visitor’s identity.
“I thought you only made the two Yule logs,” she said to her sister.
Colby hiked up her green and gold dress and threw one leg, then the other, over the bench to sit beside her. “Pumpkin’s your favorite, and you don’t love chocolate like the rest of humanity.” Colby held up two spoons. “But you’re gonna share.”
They cleaned the plate in companionable silence, the muted strains of Christmas music from inside and the distant crash of waves floating softly in the night air around them. Until Colby disturbed the calm, as was her way. “Mom and Dad may not have noticed your disappearing act, but I did.”
“I needed a breather from all the cheer.”
Colby bumped a shoulder against hers. “I’m sorry this isn’t the holiday celebration you wanted.”
“Deals die all the time.” She dragged her spoon through Colby’s standout cranberry coulis. “And this one still may not.”
“I wasn’t only talking about the deal.”
She licked her spoon clean, then traded it for her mug of wine. “You seem more invested in things working between me and Al than you’ve been with anyone else I’ve dated. And we’re not even technically dating. Why?”
Colby side-eyed her. “You basically were, and even if you technically weren’t, you wanted to.”
CC bumped her shoulder back. “Answer the question.”
“Because she’s your match. And—” She bit her lip in an uncharacteristic display of hesitation.
Ripples of worry that CC was becoming all too familiar with lately creeped up her spine. She set aside her mug. “And?”
“And I don’t want you to be alone.”
The worry receded. Colby was just looking out for her. See: pumpkin roll. CC wrapped an arm around her sister’s shoulders. “I’m not alone. I have you.”
“But I won’t be with you much longer.”
CC froze, a tsunami appearing out of nowhere and bowling her under the waves. She sank, all that ice drifting around her heart the past few days now freezing into an iceberg at Colby’s words, taking her down. “What? What’s wrong?” Every worst-case scenario screamed through her head.
“Nothing bad,” Colby rushed to clarify, a hand on her forearm. She angled toward CC, their knees bumping under the table. “I, umm...” She flicked her gaze down to the empty plate, then back up to CC’s. “I got a job offer that was too good to pass up.”
Oh. Oh! The banter CC couldn’t follow in Al’s kitchen at Hanukkah suddenly made sense. “Miller or Noah?”
