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In his life.
Still, he knew he needed to proceed with caution, not get too far ahead of himself. And definitely not give her any clue that he was thinking more and more about having her in his house, in his bed, in his life on a permanent basis.
He laughed at a joke Trevor made about North Korea and glanced at Colleen to see her reaction. She didn't even crack a smile. In fact, she didn't seem to be paying attention to the show at all, her gaze fixed on a point just above it, a pensive look in her eyes.
He reached down and lightly squeezed her thigh. There was no mistaking the way her muscles tensed under his hand, the way her body stiffened on the couch next to him.
He grabbed the remote off the coffee table and turned off the flat screen.
She turned to him, startled.
"Tell me what's going on," he said.
She shook her head. "I told you, I'm just tired. And, you know, I've got a lot on my mind."
"You've been tired a lot of nights, and you've had a lot on your mind for months, and that didn't make you stiffen and shrink away from me."
Colleen opened her mouth to protest right as JT brushed his hand across the bare skin of her forearm. She flinched her arm back before she could stop herself.
He said nothing, one eyebrow cocked as he deliberately lifted his hand from her arm.
She sighed and rolled her eyes. "It's nothing." At least, that's what she had been trying to tell herself all evening. The fact that he'd been engaged shouldn't matter. Who the woman was shouldn't matter. The fact that, according to Susan Doherty, JT had been the one dumped and might still be pining for his lost love shouldn't matter.
And yet her mind couldn't stop churning over all the questions about who she was, and why JT hadn't told her. To the point where even his touch—which usually had the power to blot out just about every thought from her brain—couldn't distract her.
"It's obviously not nothing." He sat back against the opposite end of the couch, mouth tight with irritation. "You're upset with me about something."
She was, stupidly. But she was even more upset with herself.
"Why don't you just tell me what it is so we can talk about it?"
But if she talked about it, she would be admitting that her feelings about him weren't nearly as casual as she wanted them both to believe. She would be admitting that she felt way more possessive of him than someone who was just friends with benefits had a right to be.
Yet, like it or not, those feelings were there. And as a result, all the questions about his past were chewing her up inside.
She clasped her hands in her lap and blew out a long breath. "I heard something today that shouldn't have bothered me, but it really does."
His dark brows knitted into a frown. "Is this about the time your brother and I got drunk at the Last Chance and danced on the bar with our shirts off?"
Her head jerked back. "No. When did that happen?"
"About six months ago. I'd just gone through a bad breakup and Liam took me out to cheer me up. We got a little carried away."
He'd left her an opening as wide as a barn door and she took it. "Was that when you broke up with your fiancée?"
He leaned back against the couch and gave her a knowing look. "Is that what this is about? Melanie?"
She felt heat creep into her cheeks at the way it made her sound: all immature, so needy. Oh, who the hell was she kidding? She was immature and needy. "One of Mom's friends, Susan Doherty, mentioned that you had a fiancée who had left you quote, 'high and dry.'"
"And that's what got you so upset, the fact that I was engaged?" He sounded genuinely baffled.
"Not that you were engaged, that you never mentioned it."
"What was I supposed to say, 'Oh by the way, I got engaged to a woman last fall but she broke it off three months later?' It never came up. And honestly, I figured you probably knew about it anyway."
"How would I know about it?"
He shrugged. "Your mom? Your brother? They both knew all about it. I'm surprised they never mentioned it."
