Page 44 of Vampires Don't Suck


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A chicken came out of nowhere, landing in front of the dog, and then there was an impact of fire and feathers that ended in a mad scramble as I and Mirabel abandoned the stage to rescue the creatures.

I shouldn’t have bothered because the Scholar coalesced into black specks then fully formed in the midst of the mess, grabbed the chicken by its legs while it pecked wildly, and taking it away from Pansy who whined and cowered away from the fierce fiery beast.

I reached them only a moment before Mirabel.

“Thanks,” I said, grabbing Pansy’s collar and looking up at the Scholar, who was being pecked by a burning chicken, but still managed to look unearthly handsome.

He smiled at me and something in my chest came to life, eclipsing the pain that had gnawed on me since the rending. “You were magnificent,” he said softly, and for some incomprehensible reason, I believed him.

I shifted awkwardly while Pansy lunged away from the chicken who had taken that moment to flap its wings and squawk a battle cry. “I think it has some merit,” I said without the slightest idea what I was saying. “The scholarship of dating, I mean. Experimenting in a controlled environment to check outcomes.” I blushed hard because why was I talking about dating at a time like this?

Mirabel grabbed the chicken and tucked it under her arm. “My precious diamond, you’re supposed to stay out of trouble during the beginner’s showcase,” she cooed at it. The chicken was her avian friend? It bobbed its head and dove into her armpit, apparently content to hide like that now that it had done its work of traumatizing Pansy.

“What sort of controlled environment did you have in mind, Miss Morell?” the Scholar asked, absently straightening his tie while his eyes never left mine.

“Well, I need to tune the lamps in Song, but I wouldn’t like to go alone?” I said it like a question, because dating? What did I know about dating? Nothing. Big, miserable, glaring nothing, even more obvious than my lack of musical skills. Of course he’d want to experiment with both of those. Since one wasn’t enough I had to conflate music and companionship. It would be a disaster.

“Good thinking,” Mirabel said brightly. “And then he can take you somewhere nice to eat in Song. Explore the local cuisine, try something new, and compare notes on the subject afterwards. It sounds very academic. Mr. Scholar, we’re always open to donations from benefactors in the city, and they’re always tax deductible.” She beamed even more terrifyingly at him.

She’d actually hit him up for money, just like she’d said she would. I was going to die of embarrassment. “I’m going to go get the snacks,” I said, picking up Pansy and dragging him out the nearest door into the hall beyond.

“Wait,” the Scholar said, catching up to me in the outside hall. “When would you be available for the…”

Was I serious about this? He was a vampire. And he’d come to cheer for my beginner concert.

Anna chose that moment to burst through the doors after me, Gabby close behind. “You were amazing! Not at first, but the magic is real, isn’t it? You have potential. That’s what we were seeing, at least that’s what Gabby says, and you know how bright she is. She’s so bright, and I believe that the benefits of establishing a scholarship with the local university can be very useful for organizations like Song’s laboratory.” She gave the Scholar a manic smile that was even more terrifying than Mirabel’s. Gabby winced and blushed all the way to her red hair.

“Yes, I have scholarships set up in several areas. Your daughter can apply, but they are targeted towards those discriminated against the most, werewolves, zombies, that sort of thing.” He gave Anna a polite smile before he turned back towards me. “When?”

My mouth went dry and my heart beat harder and faster. “Um, tomorrow night? Six?”

He exhaled and nodded. “At six tomorrow evening, I’ll come by your apartment. I’ll let you get back to your duties.” He gave me a slight bow and then slipped back into the main hall, leaving me with Anna and Gabby.

Gabby was smirking at me. Her delicate beauty beneath sheets of red curly hair hid the strong and willful personality that kept her healer mother busy patching her up from her daredevil tricks at the local skate park. “Well, other than being humiliated by my mother’s shameless grab for money, that was illuminating. Libby, he’s hot.”

“You shouldn’t objectify people,” Anna said, then added, “I know, right? He’s so handsome, but it’s the violence buttoned beneath the perfectly tailored suit that really makes him sexy. So, you asked him on a date.”

I groaned and headed towards the snacks. They came with me, but no matter how much they pushed and prodded, I didn’t elaborate the why’s and how’s, not when I wasn’t sure how I’d gotten to the point of dating a vampire, myself. Not that we were anywhere, I mean, one experimental tune/eat combo didn’t mean anything, but for me, it was a first, and maybe it wouldn’t be the last.

Chapter

Fifteen

The next morning, I walked Pansy, tuning three lamps on the way, which made him extremely happy, and then called up Sam, the night guard, to find out where Bert was and whether he’d been released from the hospital yet.

“He was at Bellham towers, and still unconscious the last time I visited two days ago. The board of directors jump all over anyone who asks questions about him, I would guess anticipating a lawsuit, but he was the guard, and it’s not like you can sue the board just because someone breaks in and turns your boss.”

“The Scholar turned Horace after he was killed,” I said. “I saw his body before, and it was…” I swallowed hard.

“I didn’t realize that you were a witness. Does the board know what you saw, because they make it sound like vampires did it? I guess you don’t owe them anything after they fired you, rendered you is what the Scholar called it. Is that true?” He and I were both silent for a long moment before he continued. “That’s serious, Libby. Everyone was talking about it, worrying about you, but I guess you were doing okay if you were able to go to your concert. Look, I’ve got to hang up. Jessica’s coming over.” He hung up, leaving me with so much to say, and no one to say it to. I should call the Scholar and ask him what he was doing telling everyone at the library that I’d been rendered, but I didn’t have his number, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to talk to him in case I said something crazy, like if he wanted to get sushi with me for breakfast.

I shook my head and went to the nearest train station, which was three blocks east of my apartment. I made it down my block without looking at my library, and then the rest of the way without making eye contact with anyone. Should I contact the library board and explain that the Scholar had only turned Horace after he was dead? Why had he gone into a meeting to talk about me? Was it a matter of personal interest or professional respect? Was it possible to have both, or either for that matter?

I only waited five minutes to catch the train, then a four-minute ride later, I got off in the union station and walked two terminals over until I climbed on the train boarding towards the west before it swung north. I sat down and plucked invisible strings on my pants leg while we rode in the car. The city trains were functional more than beautiful, but the long-distance trains that left Singsong City for one of the other popular destinations in the country were nice, plush, cushy. I’d ridden one on my way into Singsong six years ago, but I’d never made it out.

Singsong City’s theme played in my head, but not the student version, the full orchestral piece, including me and my fellow student’s potential. That had been powerful magic of Mirabel’s. Tiago had been quite impressed with her, but she only used the opportunity for his compliments to try to get him to go around to local schools and hustle on his own dime. She was ferocious.

The train stopped across the street from the hospital on the edge of one of the city’s large parks. In the hospital’s lobby, I stopped at the gift shop to pick up some balloons and a package of his favorite cream-filled chocolate mini-cakes.

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