Page 71 of Vampires Don't Suck


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“What is the meaning of this intrusion?” the Scholar rumbled, his claws still as careful with me as before, but his skin was slightly rougher, ready to pull out dragon armor and protect me. It was so sweet to have someone protect me. Of course I could protect myself, but it was nice to have someone, and we could protect each other.

“Since The Holy Order of the Swords of Truth are such close allies to the Montaine heir, I am here to witness the union between the Librarian and the Scholar. Also, if the Montaine heir has finished her holy work of defeating the demons and driving back darkness, I will take the Angelic Sword of Retribution with me after I witness.” His voice was pure and low, a baritone probably. Did angels sing? Of course angels sang. He was definitely an angel with a voice like that.

“Are we close allies?” I asked, trying to sound confidently confused.

He smiled, showing his white teeth and dazzling smile. He really was angelically gorgeous. “Would the Holy Order of the Swords of Truth lend out an angelic relic to someone who wasn’t a close ally?”

I pursed my lips as I studied him, and he stared at me in return. He knew that I’d stolen the sword, and if I didn’t want this to end in a bloodbath, I’d accept their close alliance with a smile.

I swallowed hard. “Of course, I was just thinking that ‘close’ is such an insufficient word for my feelings of deep respect and gratitude to the Holy Order of the Swords of Truth and all the work you do. I’m not familiar with what it means for you to witness. Do you want to take over officiating?”

I glanced at Cross, who was looking at the gorgeous angel with a calculating frown that I recognized. They knew each other, probably behind closed doors, one order of secret assassins to another order of blatant killers. Politics. Shudder.

The Scholar answered for him. “To witness means to lend credence to the marriage, to make it insoluble without a special mandate from the Order. Historically, you do not often give permission for divorce.”

The angel laughed and smiled charmingly. “That would be utterly archaic.”

“That wasn’t a no,” Katrina said, reminding me that she was still there, standing to the side, waiting for me to need her to carry my train.

He glanced at her and for a moment there was a flicker of something less charming before he returned his gaze to me. “Ally Montaine, do you accept the Holy Order of the Swords of Truth’s witness?”

Why didn’t they want me to get a divorce? That made it seem like they supported my marriage to the Scholar. I swallowed hard, then glanced at my vampire-dragon. “Is that okay?” I asked him. “I’d rather you not be able to divorce me when you got tired of me.”

He moved closer, looking at me in a way that made it impossible to breathe, so intent but so tender. “I accept the witness.”

I beamed at him, then turned to smile at the angel. “Yes, thank you.”

His mouth twitched in what may have been an actual smile before he bowed again. “Excellent. Your fine officiator may continue.”

I looked up at Cross and he continued exactly where he’d left off. “To witness the blessed Union between one Libby Elizabeth Pearl Morell Montaine to Michael Earnest Stead, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, in sickness and health, in darkness and light, until the sands of time run dry. Do you, the Librarian, agree to wed the Scholar, to be patient with his strange obsession with oranges and peppermint, and researching dry topics that you couldn’t possibly be interested in?”

I blinked at him. Maybe he should have stuck with the traditional route. I looked at my Scholar and smiled at the feelings I saw in his infinitely mesmerizing eyes.

“I do.”

I said the words, and a pulse of power swelled around me, binding my heart like I was bound to the library. Huh. I probably could have married him by saying I was married and using my authority as the Librarian to make it official. That would have saved time.

“Do you, the Scholar, agree to wed the Librarian, to love her and protect her and make certain that she doesn’t work herself to death or go blind from translating some ancient language in dim lighting?”

He cleared his throat and then flashed a terrifyingly happy smile at me. “I do.” His lab responded similarly to my library, and I could feel him in my heart, and could feel him holding me in his.

“I love you,” he said, moving closer and carefully tracing my face with the back of his hand. “I will never betray you, not by imprisoning you, and not by stepping away against your will. I swear it, and the angel witnesses. I will love you and adore you until the stars fall from the sky.”

“Witnessed,” the angel agreed, like the intoning of a bell.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may…” The rest of Cross’s words were blocked out by the cheers as I flung my arms around his neck and kissed him. My vampire. My monster. My husband.

When I came up for air after my kiss, the angel said, “Good enough. Where’s the sword?”

Cross brought it out of his robes and handed it over with a slight bow, handle first.

The angel took it with his own bow and then ran fingers lightly over the blade. The resulting flash of bright light made my eyes water. He strapped the sword to his back and smiled at me.

“I can see why you would want a sword like this. With proper training, you could even kill a dragon with it, a dragon like the Scholar. But you married him instead of killing him. Bold move.”

Katrina came forward spitting mad. “You don’t announce to the public someone’s secret self!” She attacked him before anyone could stop her. I held my breath, waiting for him to turn her into a gold statue or burn the Lab down with bombs of heavenly fyre, but instead, he spun her around before her claws could break the skin of his face, holding her awkwardly to his front and side.

He cleared his throat as he frowned down at her. “I accept,” he finally said, then raised his eyes to the Scholar who was very stiff beside me. She was his responsibility, but she’d attacked an angel. You just didn’t do that and expect any kind of life existence afterwards. “Your young charge has asked me to dance. I’m not accustomed to vampire customs, and for a moment I thought she might have violent intentions towards a Lion of the Sword. I’m so glad to realize that I was mistaken.”

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