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“You’re in no condition to go anywhere,” he interrupted. “You’ve been out for three fucking days, and you’re not healing the way we do.”
Probably why I felt so fucking crappy. It didn’t fucking matter though.
“I need to see Nolan. I can help—”
“Killian,” Roan began, his serious tone stressing me out, “Nolan’s upstairs in the ICU in critical condition. He lost his eye and a kidney. He suffered significant burns from the metal she used, and the damage to his bones requires bone grafts, but he’s not stable enough for surgery. Killian… they don’t… they don’t think he’s going to make it.”
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
“I can help him,” I repeated adamantly. And I could. With magic. As I managed to pull my ass out of bed, I demanded, “Where’s the shit I wore here?”
“In a bag, why?” he asked. “Raven brought you clothes.”
“I don’t care about the fucking clothes she brought. I need my goddamn uniform.” Because in my fucking uniform was a Hail Mary that might just save my baby brother’s life now that the spikes were gone. I pulled out the IV, ignoring the pinch of pain and the trickle of blood. I tossed it aside with my hospital gown.
“The fucking socks.” Roan chuckled. I glanced down at the pale blue hospital socks. Deja-fucking-vu. Of all the shit he and I were repeating, it would be me naked in a pair of hospital grippy socks.
Fuck it, I was keeping them.
“I like the fucking grippy socks, okay?” I snapped. Jesus fuck, the things I found myself saying around him. “Leave my fucking socks alone.”
“You’re awful fucking touchy about socks.”
“Where’s my shit?”
“You need to get back to bed,” Roan repeated. “I can see you fucking shaking, man.”
Okay, yes, I was fucking falling apart. My body didn’t feel like my own, but I’d done that shit to myself. I would’ve bet my left nut that I felt this way because Lane’s magic was settling on top of being injured.
“Get back in bed, Killian, or I’ll put you there myself.”
“Hurt or not, I can fucking take you.”
I broke his fucking nose when he tried to wrestle me back into bed. That would forever be the story of how I became a missing patient in that hospital. In my defense, I did warn him. I left my room with Roan pissed off behind me. We had to be a fucking sight—him with a bloodied face as he carried my shit and me wearing pants I didn’t even bother to button and goddamn grippy socks.
“Jesus fuck, what did you do to his face?” Sam asked when we entered the waiting room for the ICU. My brothers were crammed in the tiny fucking chairs in the tiny fucking room, looking exhausted and emotional—even Lucas looked like crap as he slept fitfully folded over in a chair. Raven sat next to Declan while Cade sat on the floor nearby. There were too fucking many of them for a room this size.
The lack of my wife’s presence didn’t go unnoticed, but between her and Nolan, I had to prioritize. Genevieve wasn’t going to die. Nolan might. One thing at a fucking time.
“He tried to fucking stop me,” I said. “Which room is Nolan’s?”
“Mom’s in there with him right now,” Finn replied.
“Great. What fucking room?” I gripped the vial of magic that had been tucked between the fabrics of my uniform. When no one fucking answered, a deep growl vibrated in my chest. “If someone doesn’t tell me soon, I’m breaking more faces.”
“Just tell him,” Roan snapped. He threw my shit on the floor and dropped into a chair. “Fuck, I need ice.”
“You’ll heal,” I retorted. I’d apologize later.
“Mom needs time with him,” Declan stated. “You need to go back to your room. I’m assuming you’re the code yellow alert.”
“Either I go room by room until I find him, or one of you fucking helps me,” I growled, but the sound that came out of me filled the room. Shit. I had to get myself under control. I drew a deep breath and counted to ten before trying again. This time, I held up the vial of blue liquid. “I can save his fucking life with this. It’s magic. But I can’t do it if I don’t fucking know where he is. Can you just fucking trust me?”
“I do trust you,” he replied and stood. “But if you pass out, I’m leaving you where you fucking fall. You look like shit, and you shouldn’t be up.”
“I feel worse,” I admitted. “I need to see Nolan.”
“Put a fucking shirt on and button your goddamn pants before your dick falls out.” Declan sighed.
