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He raised one hand in a goodbye as I turned around in the large part of the driveway. “Goodbye,” I said softly as his silhouette in the door disappeared as I rounded the bend.
The whole drive home, I replayed the evening from the second CJ approached me until he faded from sight. He’d saved me from going home feeling defeated and given me more pleasure than I’d had, even before my dickhead ex moved out. Why couldn’t I have met him or someone like him before my days consisted of chasing my toddler around and the long nights were filled with work? I’d make a terrible partner right now.
The only reason I didn’t have circles under my eyes tonight was because I’d slept better with my mom visiting and watching Lexi during the day while I got my work done. Her presence had allowed me to get even further ahead than I usually was. She’d been a godsend, but she’d be leaving soon, and she wouldn’t be back until sometime in the spring.
Yeah, I’d have loved to ask CJ for his phone number, but I’d have only ended up disappointing both of us and tarnishing what had been a memorable evening. I’d have to hold onto tonight in the upcoming months until Mom returned, giving me another chance to sneak out for some companionship.
It didn’t surprise me when I turned on my street to see my white house with the blue shutters from the glow of the porch light. Until I’d moved out of my parents’ home, my mom had always left a light on for me to see by when I got home after dark. It’d made sense when I was a teenager parking in the driveway, instead of inside the garage like I did now. I guessed old habits died hard, and I smiled, visualizing doing the same type of thing for my daughter in the future.
“Hi, honey,” Mom said, coming in from the family room as I walked in.
Jumping, I put my hand over my chest. “Shoot, Mom. You scared the crap out of me. What are you still doing up?”
She lifted her arm, waving her Kindle in the air. “Reading.”
Playfully, I exaggerated, checking my watch. “Isn’t it past your bedtime? I thought seniors went to bed early.”
She gave me the stink-eye and stuck out her tongue. “You better watch your mouth.” Then she laughed good-naturedly, running her assessing gaze over me. “Did you have fun?”
Averting my eyes so I didn’t see her smirk, because ew, she was my mom, I shrugged. “It was alright.”
She snorted. “Mhm, I bet.”
“What?” I asked, slightly embarrassed. Could she tell I’d just had the best sex of my life?
“What? What?” she teased, then sobered. “I’m glad you went out tonight. You need you time.”
I groaned. “Not this again. Mom, my life is everything I want it to be. I love being a dad.”
“I know you do, and you’re a marvelous father.” She sighed. “But, Kevin, you're allowed to be more than Lexi’s dad, you know?”
I frowned.
“Don’t look at me like that. I know how hard you're working to keep all the balls in the air, and I’m so damn proud. But you’re going to burn out. When I’m not here, you’re burning the candle at both ends trying to work while she’s sleeping. You don’t have any kind of social life?—”
“That’s not true,” I said, cutting her off. “We spend a lot of time with George and Margie and their kids.”
“And they’re lovely. I’m so happy that you and Lexi have them. I love them, too. But I really think you should look into?—”
I narrowed my eyes.
Mom held up her hands. “I’ll leave it alone for now, but you look like you had a pretty good night. I saw that smile on your face when you walked through the door. At the very least, you should consider seeing if one of George’s kids or someone in the neighborhood would be interested in babysitting a couple of nights a month so you can go out. You’re not going to find a man hiding in this house with your daughter.”
With that, she blew me a kiss and sauntered back to wherever she’d been reading. Mom had been dripping her concerns for my lack of freedom into conversation her whole visit. She didn’t overstep and was good at backing off the minute I gave her the look. Normally, I appreciated her opinions, but I easily ignored them if they didn’t line up with my vision for my life. Now, with CJ fresh in my mind, I wondered if maybe I was being a little… No. I’d made the decision to be a father, and Lexi came first.
CHAPTER THREE
CJ
“There’s my boy.” The small woman bustled toward me as I entered the kitchen.
“Hey, Ma.” I dropped my duffle bag on the floor and enfolded her in a bear hug. “You sure you don’t mind me staying?”
She stood up on tiptoes to kiss my cheek, so I bent to accommodate her. As soon as she stepped back, she swatted at my chest with the towel in her hand. “Of course not. This is your home. You know better. I washed your sheets and remade your bed, so it’s all ready for you.”
“Mom, you didn’t have to do that. I am grown.” She’d never asked why sometimes I stayed with her between jobs or on my nights off and others I didn’t. But she knew Eddie, so maybe she’d guessed that it had everything to do with whether he had company or not. Since Joan had crawled into his bed the night I’d left him at Rafters and seemed to be quite content staying there, I wouldn’t be cock-blocking him.
She patted my cheek. “You’ll always be my baby. Now come in and tell me all about watching that fancy house. Was it creepy being there alone?”
