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He has a girlfriend, and he kissed me. He kissed me like he wanted me when he had a girlfriend. He used me, and I fell for it. He must have had a good laugh at how easy I was.
My heart continues to sink. I know I'm spiraling, but I can't stop myself. I'm mad at myself more than I'm mad at him. It was supposed to be a stupid crush that should have died years ago. Why am I feeling like a jilted lover? What the hell is wrong with me?
Finally, something interrupts my thoughts.
“Gianna.” The voice is quiet and unsure. But I would know that voice anywhere.
I feel Chris coming closer, and he leans against the railing beside me. “Where have you been? I have been looking for you.”
As much as I tried to appear nonchalant, anger and deflection were all I could offer him. “Well, you have been very busy, so you wouldn't have noticed when I left.” My voice comes out sharper than I wanted.
He looks at me puzzled. “I'm not too busy for you. I kept looking for you, and you were nowhere to be found.”
As much as I would like to control my anger, I snap. “Why were you looking for me? To finish what you started, you two-timing jerk?”
He frowns, having the guts to look confused. “Where's all this coming from?”
I turn to fully face him. “To think I was starting to feel remorseful that I've been too hard on you. But you deserved it all along. You kissed me when you have a girlfriend!”
He blinks. “Girlfriend?” he repeats like it’s ridiculous.
“Don't act dumb. Nala told me.”
I see the understanding settle in his eyes and he smiles. I feel the urge to wipe the smile out of his face.
“Oh, you mean Jessica?” he chuckles at my expense, and it only angers me more. “She's not my girlfriend. She's just a friend. A distant friend at that. Luke invited her, not me.”
I don't believe him. They were too cozy not to be something. “Nala said?—”
“Forget what Nala said. She doesn't know anything about my relationships or lack thereof. What I and Jessica had ended a long time ago. We are strictly friends,” he assures me.
To my dismay, I can feel my heart lightening.
He closes the distance between us, still smiling. “So, were you jealous?”
I flush in embarrassment, realizing that I sounded like a jealous girlfriend. I can't even see his eyes now.
“I was just angry when I thought you made me the other party in your relationship,” I say in defense. “I've been cheated on. I know how that feels. I wouldn't want to inflict the same on someone else.”
He blinks in surprise. “You were cheated on?” He snaps his mouth shut. “Sorry, I shouldn't have said that.”
Inhaling deeply, I dare a look at him and my heart skips when I find deep eyes already staring at me. My lips part slightly, my gaze fluttering over his face.
“It's okay.” My voice is quiet.
“I should have hit that guy harder then,” he says, making me laugh.
“How did you know he's the one who cheated on me?” I ask amidst chuckles.
“Let's just say I recognize assholes, and he's one.”
It's funny how Chris made me restless, and at the same time, he knows how to make me feel at ease.
“How are you enjoying the party?” he asks.
“It's good. I haven't let myself enjoy it. In truth, I'm not one for parties.”
He smiles and leans against the railings facing me. “Me neither.”
