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“I’ve missed you, too, Derek.” I finally release my truth, wanting to settle his troubled soul. As much as I need to keep my distance, I don’t want him to feel like I’m shutting him out. The man is burdened enough by his past and doesn’t need to feel like another person in his life has abandoned him. I may be hurt that he’s been too busy to see me, and I may selfishly hate that I’m not the most important thing in his world anymore, but I don’t want him to ever think for one second that he’s lost another person in his life. I’m not going to be like my brother and everyone else who has made him feel like he isn’t worthy of being loved. I just need to figure out how to love him like a brother and not like the man I want to marry and make babies with.
But I’m not sure if that’s even possible. Even the anger and pain didn’t shut the feelings off.
His big arms lift me from the ground and he nuzzles into the side of my neck. A little whimper escapes my lips and I’m flooded with embarrassment. So much for being immune and not acting like a lovesick puppy. Goodness, I’m so pathetic. The guy is six years older than me and is used to more mature women. He can have any female he wants. Probably has a line of them waiting their turn to warm his bed each night. He definitely would never be interested in little ol’ me. A girl who practically clings to him like plastic wrap and moans like a cat in heat when he’s simply giving her a hug.
I need to get it through my thick skull that he doesn’t want me. Never has. And never will. I need to stop fantasizing that there could ever be something more between us. I’m just his once-best friend’s kid sister. The pest who was always following them around and chatting their ears off. I’m the girl he helped take care of after my parents died, and my brother was tied up at the police academy and couldn’t watch me himself. I’m the girl Derek held the night before I left town, wiping away my tears and reassuring me that everything would be okay. And that anytime I was feeling homesick up at school, to call him and he’d always pick up. And he did. He always picked up the phone, and he always made me feel like I was home even though I was a thousand miles away.
Oh God! I’m so in love with him it hurts. But he doesn’t feel the same, or else he would’ve come to visit when I begged him to.
I try to pull from his embrace again, needing space between me and that crushing truth. “I really do need to get to work, Derek. It’s my first night on the floor, and I don’t want to be late.”
He lets out a long sigh and finally releases his hold. I take a few steps back, trying to shake the disappointment and catch my breath. I need to get out of here so I can recover. That hardened shell I’d built over the last four years has suffered a big crack and I need to mend it— fast. But when I see Derek’s eyes traveling slowly over the length of my body, finally looking at me after all this time, the crack splits further. The longer he stares, the darker his eyes grow, making me think he might like what he sees and may be taking notice for once, but his harsh reprimand quickly proves just how delusional I am.
“What the fuck do you have on, Hailey? You’re not going to work like that. You look like fucking jailbait.” He’s shaking his head at me like I’m a defiant child and he’s my father. It’s obvious he still sees me as a little girl, which only has my stomach sinking further. “You better march back into that closet and put some fucking clothes on right fucking now, or you’re not going to be leaving this house and will no longer have a job to be late for.”
Like hell am I going to be treated like a kid again. I’m already dealing with one man in my life who still sees me as a twelve-year-old little girl, I don’t need another. I step right up to him, getting in his face. If he’s going to treat me like a child, then I’ll damn well act like one.
“Sorry, Daddy, but if you haven’t noticed, I’m twenty-two now. You no longer have a say in the matter. Now, this happy little family reunion has been fun and all, but I have more important things to do.” I step around the giant brick wall in front of me who’s practically frothing at the mouth, and walk out of my room. It’s time for me to get away from these crushing feelings trying to take me down.
“You’re going to let her fucking leave the house dressed like that?” Derek’s angered question is directed at my brother, who happens to be standing in the hall with his arms crossed, looking just as pissed as the man behind me.
“I don’t have a say in the matter. She already threatened to move out if I gave her any more shit about it. Why do you think I called your ass?”
Great. So now they’re ganging up on me. They may not be friends anymore, but they’ll gladly set their issues aside to put me in line like I’m a little girl. Guess that’s the real reason Derek came storming over, not to finally see me, but to handle the “stubborn little girl” since I was refusing to listen to Bentley. Just like old times, huh?
I turn toward both of the overprotective, brooding men in my life and give them each a look, letting them know they need to back down or they’ll both be sorry. “If either of you pulls this shit again, I won’t just move out on my own. I’ll move away, get a job at a fucking strip club, and you won’t have any say in the matter. I’m an adult, and no one, not even you, Officer Bentley, can argue the fact that it is my legal right to work wherever I damn well want and dress however I damn well please. Now, if the two of you overbearing jerks don’t mind, I’m leaving now.”
I walk right past my brother and straight out the door. I get in my car and head to Trigger’s for my shift with the tension spinning inside me faster than my tires spinning on the pavement. Those two men are infuriating. I love them, but they sure know how to piss a girl off.
CHAPTER 2
Grit
Fuck!
Damn, she hasn’t changed. Well, personality-wise, that is. She’s still a stubborn little ass. Hardheaded and sassy as ever. Physically, on the other hand, hot fucking damn. I didn’t think the girl could get any more beautiful or more tempting, but she’s gone and grown into quite the woman. Her body has matured in all the right places, and damn, are her curves sexy as hell. She’s a walking temptation, and the men at the bar will eat her alive. Which is why I need to get my ass down there and make sure everyone knows to keep their fucking hands off, or they’ll be facing the consequences. I’d make Trigger fire her ass, but knowing Hailey, she’ll make good on the threat she just threw our way, and there’s no way I’m letting her leave me again.
Bentley and I both stare at the open door she just hightailed it out of, and as soon as her car pulls out, he turns to me, looking worried as hell. He’s concerned she’ll get hurt, and that makes two of us. But that’s never going to happen because I’m going to make damn well sure it doesn’t.
“Yeah, I’m going,” I tell him and head straight out the door.
I have my helmet on and am ready to climb onto my bike and chase her mouth-watering peach of an ass down when I hear Bentley’s voice. “Don’t forget your fucking promise, Burken.”
I grit my teeth, feeling the tension tightening my shoulders. How could I fucking forget when he’s here to remind me every single day that the girl I love, the only one I could ever picture by my side until I’m old and gray, is off-fucking-limits.
“Yep, heard you loud and clear. Have a good day, Officer.” I give him a clipped salute that matches my clipped tone, then straddle my bike and drive the fuck away from the house I once considered my home. And away from the guy who I once considered family. A brother. I still do, and always will, but I can’t say the same for him.
After the morning he saw me leaving Hailey’s room, the morning she was heading off to college, Bentley made me an enemy. And ever since, the guy I considered my best fucking friend has iced me out of his life. Except when he needs something like he does now. Then he’ll gladly pick up the phone and make his fucking demands, always letting me know what will happen if I don’t follow through with his orders. For an officer of the law, he sure knows how to blackmail someone like a motherfucker.
I park my bike right next to Hailey’s car instead of next to all my brothers’ rides like usual. My girl isn’t going to be leaving here tonight without us having some words. She may be getting her way and will be keeping her job in this place, but she’s going to have to start covering her sinful little body up. If I had my way, she’d be dressed up as a nun, covered from head to toe in a huge frock. I’d have her serving up some holy spirits if I had a say in the matter. But even still, I doubt it’d deter anyone. No matter what she wears, she’ll still be tempting to all the devils who frequent this place.
Honestly, I’m not even worried about them because that will be handled. I’m worried about myself and the fact that I’m up at this bar every night after work, winding down with the guys over a drink. Seeing her in those tiny shorts which curve that perfect plump round ass and reveal every single inch of those sexy smooth legs of hers, along with seeing her tits trying to break free from the cotton restricting them, is only going to wind me up instead. I’m going to lose my mind and my fucking nut every time I’m up here. Fuck!
I storm into the place, and head straight to my usual table. The guys are already seated with drinks in hand, looking at ease while my nerves are on fucking edge. “You good, Grit?” Axle asks, clearly reading the tension rolling right off me.
“Been fucking better,” I state, not elaborating on my shit. If he knew what my true problem was, he’d be fucking livid. And I know that anger would be put into action. And that’s why I keep my mouth shut. Why I’ve kept my mouth shut for four fucking years. “Girl shit,” I state, hoping he’ll accept my answer and drop it. “Speaking of girls, can you get yours over here so I can get a drink?”
He nods with a smirk and then makes a big show of getting his woman, Riley, to come to our table. I look over and see his girl heading our way, and trailing her is my girl. I guess Hailey is training with Riley tonight. Good. Now, I can keep an eye on her and introduce her to her new bodyguards.
