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That particular mental image, of Sidney wielding some wild sex toy with that smirk of his, bringing me to climax without our bodies even touching, sent a ripple of need over my skin. I smothered down the whine that crawled up my throat. “I guess that would be okay.”
Dr. James’s smile brightened. “Perfect. Let me do a quick exam, and then we can talk about your alpha choices.”
I sat patiently while my vitals were checked. My blood pressure was elevated, but that was no surprise to anyone since I’d been freaking out well before I got here and hadn’t stopped.
“Now, how many alphas are you going to be meeting with today?”
“One.”
“You only liked one from the whole batch?” Dr. James seemed surprised and paused her ministrations.
“I stopped when I found one I liked.”
“Why?” Dr. James quirked her head.
“Because it’s embarrassing!”
Rein it in, Allie.
“Sorry.” My cheeks flared with heat. “I’m having some…emotional difficulties with everything. I was really hoping I’d be beta so I could continue on like normal.” Sure, periods sucked, but they were probably less of a hassle than a heat.
“Sometimes normal can be overrated. There’s plenty of things about being an omega that betas will never get to enjoy. I know you’re uncomfortable, but there’s no shame at all around any of this. We’re all here to help.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to do stuff. I just don’t want to, you know?”
“You’ll have to clarify for me.”
Maybe it only made sense in my head…
“It’s like, I know what my body wants, but my brain is taking longer to catch up.”
The dissonance between them was wild as fuck. I knew it was the hormones that were revving my engine and preparing me to become a full omega, but I wished they came with a calming-down feature instead of just horniness. Didn’t they know I was a basket case? Why hadn’t omega biology accounted for this? Surely we should’ve evolved something to chill out the anxiety that came with this by now. But no. It was no fun being horny and panicky at the same time.
“Completely fair.” Dr. James gave me a sympathetic smile. “Would you be interested in someone like Sidney if you weren’t in heat?”
“Well, I mean, yeah. He looks like a model. But I was hoping for more than that for my first time.”
“One moment.” Dr. James rolled over to her computer and tapped away on the keys. She snatched a page off the printer and handed it to me. “Here’s his full profile.”
I scanned over it. Middle child. Twenty-four years old. Sagittarius...
“He rescues puppies! Are you kidding me right now? There’s no way that’s real.”
“Quite real. Sometimes he’ll bring fosters into the office.” Dr. James smiled over her laced fingers. “We’re very selective about who can be a heat helper. They have to demonstrate compassion, in addition to being knowledgeable about omega care and being physically fit enough to handle the demands of the job.”
My resolve wavered.
Stupid sexy puppy-saving alpha.
“Okay, so, say I agreed to have him as my heat partner. Then what?”
“Your form says you live with your mother, so in this case, you’d pack yourself whatever supplies you need, and Sidney would take you to his home. All the alpha homes are professionally cleaned after every heat, so you don’t have to worry about a thing. Once your heat is over, you’ll have up to three days of recovery time with him, though you’re free to leave before that. You can either come here or go to your regular doctor for a post-heat checkup and that’s it. You’re free as a bird until your next heat.”
I groaned and dropped my face in my hands. Logically I knew it was the best choice. I just had to convince my brain that it was fine.
“Can I hang out with him before I decide?”
“Of course. Why don’t you head back to the meeting room? I’ll be here to sign off on the contract if you need me.”
