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Sam gently broke the kiss, her hands tight around Natalia’s hips. Eyes glazed with desire, Natalia looked like she was ready to push the limits of how far she was willing to go in public. Like she might throw Sam into the narrow confines of her backseat and maul her.
Despite wanting to devour Natalia, Sam stopped herself. There was nothing she’d rather do tonight than take Natalia home, but there was no doubt in her mind that it would end the same way the first had.
“What is it?” Natalia’s perfect eyebrow twitched in question as she ran her nails over Sam’s lower back.
“I don’t know your middle name,” Sam said like it was a deal-breaker. “I don’t know if you have siblings.”
Natalia stared back at her, the fire in her eyes still raging. Still dancing wildly and lulling Sam into almost believing that it didn’t matter how little she knew Natalia. That the fun they’d have if they left together would be enough. But Natalia was no more available now than she had been almost two months ago. She’d still fly out of her bed as soon as they were done, and Sam wanted more.
“What do you want from me?” Natalia’s question was a low rumble in Sam’s chest.
Looking back at her, Sam took a deep breath. “Something more than sex,” she admitted without adding that Natalia had woken something inside her. Had made her feel curious and awake. Made her want again.
“And if sex is all I’m offering?” Natalia slipped out of her arms, taking a step back.
Sam left one hand on Natalia’s hip, eye contact unwavering. For the first time, Sam saw Natalia falter. She didn’t believe sex was all Natalia had to give. That didn’t conform to the way she touched her. The way she chased just as much as she ran.
“Is that true?” Sam pulled her in again, relieved that Natalia let herself be tugged back into her arms.
Natalia didn’t respond, but the rigidity in her body said, I don’t know. Sam closed her eyes and inhaled the scent of Natalia’s perfume as it mixed with the warm city air.
An hour later, Sam was sitting alone in her car. Playing with the chain holding her wedding rings, she wondered for the tenth time what Sofia would have to say about Natalia. She’d probably tell Sam that she’d met her match in the pain-in-the-ass department.
Sam closed her hand around the bands and shut her eyes. She’d had enough therapy to know she shouldn’t feel guilty. Blanca was right. Sofia would have never wanted her to sail into the next chapter of her life alone. And yet, guilt bedded down in her chest and made a home anyway.
In the years since she’d lost Sofia, Sam had dated other women. Apart from the first time she’d kissed another woman, she’d never felt guilty or like she was leaving Sofia behind. But there was something different about Natalia.
Dropping against the headrest, Sam’s thoughts drifted to Natalia’s silence. If sex was all she wanted, she would have said so. Natalia wasn’t the kind of person to give a shit about hurting someone’s feelings. She’d told her a million times how much she valued being direct.
Natalia’s walls were so high and treacherous. Sam was almost certain they were unscalable, too. Was she allowing herself to be drawn into Natalia because she knew subconsciously that she’d never actually catch her? It wasn’t something she could discount. Between Blanca and Natalia calling her out, she was starting to question whether there was something to her own defenses.
Reaching for her phone, Sam decided to look up her old grief support group. She hadn’t been to a meeting in years, but it felt necessary. If there weren’t any running at this late hour, she’d wait until the morning.
There was a change in the air, and it had nothing to do with the movie deal. Something real with Natalia felt possible. Felt inches away. Felt fragile and breakable and fleeting. Sam decided that she wanted to chase the maybe. Chase the possibility in Natalia’s silence. Even if it was pouring gasoline on her flight response, she had to see what was there.
She’d keep her promise to Blanca. To Sofia’s memory. And see whether Natalia was really as unavailable as she professed. Her actions certainly didn’t match her words. Sam’s chest tightened, unsure whether she wanted to be right or wrong about Natalia.
CHAPTER 21
“Full creative control? You’re fucking with us, right?” One of the four male producers in the split-screen barked.
Zoe, who was sitting in front of the TV in Natalia’s conference room, leaned forward. “We all know that’s not how this works.”
Natalia engaged every ounce of self-control in her body. Despite the anger gnawing at her belly, she retained her calm exterior. “That is the condition precedent if you want Dr. Reyes to consider a deal for the rights.” She stressed the maybe of it all again.
“Are you sure she doesn’t want a pony and a trip to space while we’re at it?” One of the suits on the screen laughed in a style reminiscent of Jabba the Hutt.
Staring straight at them, Natalia didn’t so much as blink. She sat quietly until the laughter petered out to uncomfortable throat-clearing. There were few things in life more unnerving to a powerful man than not laughing at his joke. Easy to do when they were so rarely funny.
“Natalia, I’m sure you explained to her?—”
Natalia didn’t let him continue. “It is not my job to explain anything to Dr. Reyes. I’m not brokering the deal. You asked me to find a way to those film rights. I did.”
“But who the hell does this… lady think she is? Stephen King?” One of the suits let his anger flare. Natalia nearly lost her hold on hers. He had said lady in the same way he’d say bitch.
“That lady has something you want.” Natalia stood up, refusing to engage in the same conversation over and over again.
“Whose side are you even on?” Zoe shrieked, earning a devastating glare from Natalia.
