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A faint smile tugged at Rylan’s lips. “Probably not to her, but, yeah, to anyone else with eyes and a working brain, it’s pretty fucking obvious.” He leaned back in his chair, his gaze thoughtful as he sipped his coffee. “All right, listen. Supporting someone who has experienced major trauma like Veronica requires patience, understanding, and a willingness to take small steps. It’s crucial not to push her too hard, too fast.”
Unable to stay seated any longer, Connelly popped to his feet and paced the room. “That’s the problem. I don’t know how far to push her. I’m afraid of making things worse, so maybe I’m not pushing her enough?”
“Could be. While it’s important to respect her boundaries and not rush her, gently nudging her out of her comfort zone can also be beneficial. You know her better than anyone. Trust your instincts.”
“My instincts say she needs a harder push, something to force her to take that first step, or else she’ll just keep retreating from everything until we lose her.” His throat closed up at the thought. He couldn’t lose her.
“I understand your fear, but remember, it’s a delicate balance. Pushing her too hard could trigger her further and do more harm than good. But you’re right. Sometimes a gentle nudge isn’t enough.” He drained his coffee and set the empty mug on the table between them, then pushed out of the chair and crossed to a bookshelf, running his fingers along the spines until he found the one he was looking for. He pulled it down and returned to his seat, placing the book on the table next to his mug. “You should read that.”
Connelly picked it up and read the title. Embracing Horizons: A Guide to Conquering Agoraphobia and Rediscovering Life.
“It’s a memoir by a woman who lived with agoraphobia for years,” Rylan continued. “It might give you some insight into what Veronica is dealing with. It’s a complex anxiety disorder. Most people think it’s just a fear of open spaces, but it goes beyond that. People with agoraphobia can struggle with a range of situations, from public transportation to crowded places. And some, like Veronica, struggle to leave the house at all.”
Connelly set the book down. “But why? She never used to be like this. Even after…” He trailed off, unsure of how much Rylan knew about her past. And, if he was honest with himself, he hated saying the words out loud.
“The sexual assault?” Rylan supplied.
Okay, so he knew it all. That made this conversation easier. “Yeah. She had panic attacks afterward—and who could blame her? Men she thought were her friends abused her, and then the Air Force gaslighted her into thinking it was her fault before sending her packing on some stupid bureaucratic technicality. But, even then, the panic attacks were nothing like this. She could still function in society. Now…” He shook his head. “You should see her, Ry. She’s like a ghost haunting that house. A half-finished person. I just… wish I knew why.”
Rylan’s gaze softened. “The why is hard to pinpoint. Agoraphobia is considered a complication of her original panic disorder. Dr. Firestone’s murder was traumatic for everyone, but for Veronica, it destroyed the entire foundation of her recovery. That loss triggered her panic, and now she doesn’t feel safe anywhere but at home. But, of course, this is just speculation on my part. Without talking to her, I can’t know for sure. You should encourage her to seek professional help—and it doesn’t have to be from me. As I mentioned once before, I have a female friend in Portland who does amazing work with sexual trauma survivors.”
“She won’t do it. I know her. She won’t let herself be that vulnerable to anyone again.”
“Then you need to be her support until she’s ready to try. More than anything else right now, she needs to know she’s not alone.”
“I want to support her, but so far, everything I’ve tried has backfired.”
“Agoraphobia is traumatic, overwhelming, and recovery is a gradual process. The best thing you can do is educate yourself.” He nodded toward the table. “Read the book. Watch videos online. Then learn about her triggers and her symptoms. Celebrate small victories together, and don’t be disheartened by setbacks. Because setbacks will happen. Don’t trivialize her feelings or experiences. It’s not about her ‘getting over it.’ It’s about her learning to live with the fear and exist despite it. Patience will be crucial.”
Connelly winced, which made Rylan smirk. “Patience isn’t your strong suit?”
He scratched the back of his neck. “No, not exactly. I’ve always been more of a jump-in-head-first kind of guy.”
“Well, my friend, you’re going to have to learn the art of taking things slow. But...” Rylan’s smirk widened into a full grin as the door opened, and Zak filled the frame. “Give her that push, too. Go get her a dog.”
chapter five
Connelly thanked Rylan and grabbed the book on his way out the door. Zak stepped back to allow him into the hall, then nodded at Rylan before shutting the door.
“Did Anna find a dog?” Connelly asked, tucking the book under his arm.
“So, here’s the thing...” Zak hedged, rubbing the back of his neck. “Anna is gonna kill me for telling you this, but we already have the perfect dog for Veronica in our rehabilitation wing.”
That did not sound promising at all. “And why is Anna going to kill you for that?”
“Because she doesn’t agree. Rebel is... well, she lives up to her name.”
Connelly’s heart sank. “I was thinking a sweet and gentle dog, something that Veronica could easily bond with. One that could provide comfort and support without overwhelming her.”
Zak nodded. “I get where you’re coming from. It’s the same place Anna is right now, but I know dogs and I know people and I’m telling you, Rebel is what Veronica needs. She’s stubborn as all hell, but she’s also incredibly loyal and protective.”
“I don’t know, man.”
“At least come meet her.”
Connelly sighed. He had envisioned a calm and gentle companion for Veronica, not a rebellious force of nature, but if Zak believed Rebel was the right fit, then maybe he should consider her.
“All right,” he relented. “I’ll meet her.”
