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A naked Willow Redd, aptly named for her willowy figure, a pale girl with blonde hair that kisses her waist, her small, perky breasts and proud pink nipples erect and in my fiancé’s mouth. Patrick hovering over top of her, the eco-friendly organic cotton quilt we picked out together hanging over his lower back. How ironic that this particular blanket is my only relief at being spared the sight of their bodies. From the waist down, at least.
The image burns into my brain, forming a memory that will surely haunt me forever. The two of them turn their heads slowly toward me, a look of shock and horror covering Patrick’s face. His girl, Willow? Surprise may fill her gaze but there’s not a trace of shame in her pretty blue eyes.
The raspy sound of sadness and disbelief whispers through the room. Is that me talking? It doesn’t even sound like my voice.
“How long?”
My words hang in the air. It’s a simple question, but so very important. The past few weeks swirl through my mind, the late meetings, the late-night phone calls he stepped outside to take, the sudden influx of texts.
“Linds!” Patrick scoots out from under the blanket, leaving it for Willow to pull up to cover her chest as she sits up against our bamboo headboard. He’s on the far side of the bed, grabbing his jeans from the floor, yanking them up to his slim waist. “It’s not what you think.”
Now the words flow freely, hot and rushing like lava. “That is the most insulting thing anyone has ever said to me. You think I’m a total joke? Do you? My God, Patrick. You even gave her my bag?”
I stand there, staring at him, the truth settling in my heart as it flashes over his face.
Reality is a savage bitch, slapping you in the face in the matter of a moment, setting your entire life on a new course you never saw coming.
But she’s pure and true.
A real friend.
I slip the ring from my finger, tossing it toward the bed. It lands on the part of the quilt that covers Willow’s lap. Foreshadowing? I give a manic laugh. Willow glances up at me with the audacity of a hint of fear on her lovely face.
“Have fun, you two. You certainly deserve one another.” I turn on my heel, leaving them alone, closing the door behind me as I go.
He doesn’t even bother to chase me.
I grab my purse and my key, get in my car, and just drive, letting those tears finally flow.
I allow myself one out of control gesture, pounding my palms against the steering wheel.
God…
What a fool I’ve been.
october, november, december
four
Lindy
Ishould wash my hair.
Did I shower yesterday?
I really should wash my hair.
Have I eaten?
Didn’t I have a protein bar left in this cabinet?
Time for work.
Thank God.
december 31st
Three months and nine days after Lindy found Patrick with Willow…
