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“Eighteen. I was about to graduate high school.”
“But you weren’t going to college, were you?” I remember her resume and am surprised when she nods her head.
“Yeah, I was. I had a place at Chicago.”
“What were you gonna study?”
“History.”
“Like your father?”
“Yes… exactly like my father. He’d studied there, too.”
“Then why didn’t you go?” I ask.
“When the time came, he was still in the hospital. I—I couldn’t leave Mom by herself, trying to work, and visit him, and help with his rehab. I’d never have been able to live with myself, let alone study.”
“So you stayed?”
“Yeah, and I got a job. I wanted to be here for them, but also to help financially, so Mom didn’t have to worry.”
“Do you still help financially?”
She nods her head. “Mom tells me not to, but I do it anyway.”
I let her go, so she can get back to packing. “How long was he in the hospital?”
“Nearly seven months.” She shakes her head. “At the beginning, he firmly believed he’d get back to normal, even though he’d lost the use of the right side of his body. Considering where he was, he’s done amazingly well… but…”
“He gets frustrated?” I guess, and she sighs.
“Yeah, he does.”
“That must be hard for your mom.”
“It is. They used to be so close.”
“They still are, Livia. Anyone can see that.”
“I know, but their relationship has changed. Dad’s focus has altered. Just getting through the day is a challenge. For Mom, it’s different. She still remembers all the things they had before, and the life they’d planned for themselves. Only she doesn’t even have ten seconds in the day to think about that, or herself. Her entire life revolves around Dad and whatever he needs. She puts a brave face on it, but sometimes, when she thinks no-one’s watching, she looks so sad.”
“She’s mourning,” I say and Livia spins around, staring up at me.
“Nobody died.”
“I know, baby. She’s not mourning for him. Her grief is for their relationship… and it’s hard. What they had before has gone. Everything they were planning for has evaporated, and nothing can bring it back. And while it’s nobody’s fault, this isn’t what they chose. She’s reminded of that every day… probably every minute of every day, and that just makes it harder. It makes the grief eternal.” A tear falls onto her cheek and I grab her, pulling her into my arms.
“I—I was only thinking the other day, after… after we broke up, that love’s supposed to be eternal.”
“It is, baby. It is.” I bend my head and kiss her, just briefly. “Your parents are living proof of that.” She sobs, her shoulders shaking. “Don’t cry, Livia.” I want to tell her I’ll work something out to help them… but I need to think through how I’m going to do that, and I’m not about to make idle promises.
“I—I’ve been so stupid,” she whispers into my chest and I lean back, looking down at her tear-stained cheeks.
“You’ve been stupid?”
She nods her head. “I should have realized better than anyone how easily life can be snatched away… that it’s pointless to waste time arguing over things that don’t matter.”
I hug her tight. “We’re not gonna waste any more time, baby… I promise.”
