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“Running away, actually,” I tell him. I push away from him. “Remember those little videos we made?”
Confusion flickers over his face. “How could I forget?” he says, hesitantly.
“Would you care if other people saw it?”
“In what way?”
I look around at the gathering guests who are heading towards the rows of chairs set up in the field. “Like in a private showing, in front of a few hundred guests to make a point.”
“Oh,” Keegan says, his hand caressing his jaw. He takes a step away from me as well. “Why?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. I guess I don’t have a real reason other than fuck him. He doesn’t get to keep talking to me as if what he did actually helped us, and then, in the next sentence feel sorry that I can never get anyone better than him. He stole so much of my time. Why does he get a happy ending?”
“Some would say he’s not,” Shane mutters behind me. I hadn’t felt him walk up, but he’s usually never far from Keegan so I’m not surprised.
“She’s asking if she can show our tape,” Keegan says with his attention on Shane.
“Would you show it if we said no?” he asks.
I don’t think I would, but I hesitate to give them a clear answer because I want to show it to break whatever delusion Jared has that I am sitting at home crying over the loss of him.
“Jenica, there you are.” My mother sidles up to me, grabbing onto my elbow. “The ceremony is about to start. We need to take our seats.” She gives Keegan and Shane a tight-lipped smile and pulls me away from them.
I let her, my teeth grinding together as she leads me closer to the constructed arch. “You know this is such bullshit.”
Her nails dig into my arm. “Then why did you come?”
“Because to not come means they won,” I say, pulling out of her hold.
She huffs out an annoyed hum. “This isn’t a game of who won and who lost. Do I think it’s despicable what Jared did to you? Yes, Jenica. Did you need to hear that? Does it make the truth hurt any less? In case you forgot, I have another daughter. Another daughter who is in love with a man that led her down a horrible path that has caused her to make bad decision after bad decision. You don’t need me by your side, she does.”
I slump down into the chair in the front row, my ears ringing as I try to calm the overwhelming anguish filling me. My mouth waters, and I blink repeatedly to fight back the tears. I don’t know why it surprises me that my mother continues to not even feel sorry about abandoning me.
“Did you ever think that maybe I needed you too?” I ask her.
She’s still in the seat next to me. Her chin tilts up as she watches down the aisle, refusing to answer me.
Shaking my head, I pull out my phone and hide it near my chest as I find exactly what I’m looking for. If no one is going to care about how much they hurt me, then I’m going to show them why they should have thought twice.
Two for the Show
The ceremony passed in an uneventful blur. I tuned out any vows or declarations of love and didn’t bother to acknowledge my father after he walked her down the aisle and sat next to me. I kept my attention on the men standing at Jared’s side. Every so often, Shane or Keegan would glance back at me. It irritated me that they had accepted to be his groomsmen, but it’s not like they really owed me any loyalty either. Also, I couldn’t find Oliver. I wasn’t sure if Jared uninvited him, or if he chose not to attend.
It actually made me feel less guilty about what I had planned for the reception. And less ashamed since Oliver wouldn’t be there to witness it. I could feel eyes on me throughout the night, as if they were all waiting for me to explode. By the time dinner was served, they all seemed to relax and accept that I was simply going to be silent all night.
I couldn’t stomach the food on the plate, instead downing a second glass of wine as the wedding party started their speeches. The maid of honor starts, a childhood friend of my sister’s. When she mentions that this was a long time in the making, I sneer, wondering how many people were actively aware of their affair. It disgusts me that anyone was okay hiding that from me in the name of friendship.
Maybe because I now knew the pain of that betrayal. If Nick and Natalie cheat on their partners, I will refuse to be involved at all. Seeing all the smiles on the bridesmaids turns my stomach. The only relief I feel is seeing the stone faces of Keegan and Shane.
I tap the glass lightly with the butter knife as I stand, setting both on the table. Amber’s friend looks at me warily, her eyes flitting to my sister and back to me. I hold my hand out for the microphone and she reluctantly hands it over before retreating to her place beside the bride.
Nick blocks my mother's attempt to get to me as I walk around my seat and to the dance floor. I turn to face the majority of the guests, giving Jared and Amber my back.
I smile, a nervous laugh slipping out. “Hi. I’m sure you’re all confused about how I’m the one standing here and not there.” I point my thumb to the long table behind me.
A few chuckles rumble through the room with a mixture of whispers as I sigh.
“To be honest, I don’t know how it happened either. One morning I woke up engaged to what I thought was the love of my life, and then the next I find out he’s been fucking my sister.”
