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My heart stutters in my chest at the thought of being tied down. The broken pieces of me start to feel the oh so familiar panic. I can practically taste the dirty leather strap that they used to gag me to keep me from screaming.
No!
I shake my head, trying to dislodge the memories. Matthew wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t hurt me that way. He couldn’t hurt me like that. He’s my hero. He’s nothing like the monsters the Perfects unleashed on me.
Slowly, the anxiety starts to lessen.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
MATTHEW
I can tell that I’ve hit a trigger for her anxiety. There’s no telling what those sick fucks did to her, but obviously being tied down distresses her. I can smell the fear rolling off of her. I want to help her through her growing anxiety, to assure her that I won’t ever do anything she doesn’t give consent for, but she needs to be able to control her panic on her own.
Rose looks up at me with those too big for her face blue eyes, and I can visibly see the fear leaving her as she works through her anxiety. She closes her eyes and takes a deep, cleansing breath, then levels that blue gaze back on me. “I’m okay.”
“Yes, you are,” I confirm, giving her a brief kiss.
I’m so fucking proud of her. She’s resilient, and seeing her anxiety triggered and her finding her way through to the other side proves that she’s going to be fine. It won’t be easy, but she’s going to heal from her past, and I’ll be here to help her every step of the way.
I roll us to our sides so we are lying face to face. She snuggles close, letting out a little sigh of contentment. We lay in comfortable silence. It reminds me of all the comfortable silences we shared before she disappeared. I still can’t believe that after all these years she’s here, in my arms, in my bed. It’s surreal.
Blinding hot rage floods my mind when I think of all the years we lost. I swear on everything that is holy that I will take down the fuckers that stole her away from me and broke the sweet innocence I treasured. I’ll spend the rest of my life helping her pick up the pieces until she’s happy and whole.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
ROSE
I let out a sigh as I watch Matthew put on his tie. We spent all morning cuddling in bed. We talked some, but mostly we just soaked up being in each other’s arms. Unfortunately, reality came knocking in the form of Kisten reminding Matthew of some important meetings he has this afternoon at the club.
“Are you sure you have to go?” I cringe at how needy I sound. I know he has to work, but the thought of being away from him for hours and hours feels ominous.
He looks at me through the reflection of the mirror he’s using to adjust his tie. Our eyes meet, and heat crackles between us. “Unfortunately, yes.”
I try really hard to put on a brave face. He’s reassured me multiple times that I’m not actually alone. Slade and Hannah will both be here. I would rather go to the club with Matthew, but he insists that I stay home and rest up.
Once he has his tie just so, he comes to where I’m sitting on the edge of the bed and bends to press his lips to mine. The kiss is brief but full of all the longing and desire he feels for me. “I’ll only be a few hours.”
I chew on my bottom lip, trying to hide the anxiety I’m feeling at being separated. Matthew pulls my abused lip from between my teeth and kisses it gently. “No need to tear up that sexy little lip of yours, sweetheart. I won’t be gone long, and when I get home, we will have dinner together.” His voice is like a loving caress across my frayed nerves.
“Will you have to go back tonight?”
“Yes, but tonight I want you with me.”
He lowers his forehead to mine. Our noses brush a moment before his lips find mine again. He kisses me slow and sweet. Slow and sweet doesn’t last long because when his tongue delves between my lips, I lose control. By the time he pulls away, I’m breathless and can’t remember why I was feeling so anxious.
“I really do need to go,” he murmurs against my lips.
“I know,” I breathe, my lips brushing his.
That’s all it takes for the heat between us to reignite. Matthew grasps both sides of my face in his hands and tips my head back, deepening the kiss. His lips are fierce on mine, and mine are just as hungry. I open for him without prompting, and then he’s really kissing me. Our tongues tangle and dance together as if we’ve spent years learning each other and not just a few short hours.
All thoughts fly out of my head as we lose ourselves to our body’s desires. I bury my hands in his perfectly styled hair, holding him to me. His hands move from my face, down my neck. My heart skips a beat when one of his big hands circles my throat, but the fear is cut short as his other hand cups my breast. His thumb sweeps over my nipple, and I moan at the unexpected pleasure. I never realized how sensitive my breasts are until Matthew’s touch. He swallows down my moans as he teases my nipple with his fingers.
His fingers flex around my throat, and for some reason, the slight restriction of my breath only adds to the inferno growing inside me. I’m ready to beg him for another release like he gave me earlier. A throat clearing from the doorway is like a bucket of ice water dumped over top of my desire. Even though Matthew’s big body is already between me and the door, I bury myself against him further, hiding.
Matthew’s hand runs soothingly down my back. “It’s just Kisten, sweetheart.”
Kisten clears his throat again, and I peek out from behind Matthew at him. He gives me a crooked smile, and I remind myself that Kisten is safe. That I’m safe here. There’s no reason to be scared anymore. “Sorry to interrupt, but if you want to make the meeting, we’ve got to head out.”
