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I fight a smile. That’s about as good as we’re going to get from her right now.
But I think Crew’s right. Someday she’ll really know it. And we’ll all know that she knows.
"Try the shrimp, Mary," I say, taking her by the elbow and steering her toward the buffet. "It was flown in fresh this morning. Would you like a mimosa?"
"I need something a lot stronger than that," she says, in a candid statement that almost makes me grin.
"We can do that." I understand why she and Danielle’s father are struggling with our relationship. But that’s their own shit and I won’t enable it in any way. I absolutely hate that it robs Danielle of some of her joy during these milestones of our lives together. I want to tell Mary exactly how I feel about what she’s doing to her daughter, but I won’t ruin today for Danielle. It’s her moment, not Mary’s.
But I can’t stop myself from saying, "It doesn’t matter if you understand any of this, but you need to let Danielle be happy today."
"I do want that, Nathan."
In the life she envisioned for her, not the one Danielle has chosen.
Before I say any of what I’m thinking, Lori McNeill meets us, gives me a smile, and links her arm through Mary’s. Lori turns Mary away from me, launching into an explanation of the massive buffet that is covering three tables. I’m going to buy that woman a very expensive piece of jewelry for her birthday, or Mother’s Day, or…next Wednesday. Lori McNeill can talk to a tree stump and I’ve never appreciated that more than I do now.
More guests are arriving. Val gives me a hug and Marissa comes in with Romeo in tow. She’s left Gracie with Mark, which is probably a good thing. The buffet is light on cheese. I recognize Michael’s sister-in-law, Crew’s aunt and Elise from Books and Buns.
Before I lose the opportunity to talk to our girl, I slide up behind her and wrap my arm around her waist, resting my palm on her bump. "Is this what you pictured?" I murmur in her ear.
"Yes." She glances up at me. "It’s perfect, thank you."
"Thank Lori and Lorraine. They did the heavy lifting. Can I get you anything?"
She shakes her head. "I’m fine right now."
The gift table is rapidly filling up and I see several people coming over to speak to her. I kiss the side of her head and step forward to get swept into a hug by Crew’s aunt. The McNeills are a touchy-feely family.
For the next hour, I just circle the room as the women all chat and sit down to eat. Michael is sitting with his mother and sisters and Crew is eating off of a plate as he walks around checking in with people. I’m not eating. I’m just soaking it all in. Everything I’ve gained. It feels incredible and my throat is too damn tight to swallow any food.
When it comes time to open gifts, Luna and Lori are like a well-oiled machine, handing gifts to Danielle before whisking them away and creating some elaborate display of them. I’m not even sure what I’m looking at there is so much baby gear. Apparently, anything less than forty onesies is inadequate.
"Are you ready for all this?" Val asks me, coming up beside me and handing me a plate of food and a fork. "You need to eat."
"Thanks." I absently scoop up some of the black truffle risotto. "This is really good."
"You didn’t answer my question."
"I’m eating. You told me to eat." I swallow the risotto. "But yes, I’m ready. I can’t wait, actually."
"Even for three in the morning feedings?"
"Danielle is going to breastfeed." I give her a smile. "But I will get up and help her change and settle the baby. I’m ready, willing, and able to do anything."
"I’m buying you all one of those bears with the camera in it," Val declares. "I want to see that."
"You don’t believe it will happen?" I ask the woman who was as much a mother-figure as anyone in my life.
She faces me fully and gives me a soft smile. "Actually, I do believe it will happen. And I really want to see it because seeing you that happy will be so amazing to witness, Nathan."
I don’t know what to say. I swallow hard. "Thank you, Val."
"And I will be insisting on babysitting. Getting rid of four doting parents will be a challenge, I realize, but I will be getting my baby fix, understand?"
I grin, grateful that she knows me well enough to let me off the emotional hook. I lean over and kiss her cheek. "I understand."
She pats my cheek. "You really do. Finally."
