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I stood stoically without saying anything at first.
“Such a disappointment, but that’s nothing new, is it?” He sighed and it was tinged with annoyance. Hurt contorted my face.
“We did the best we could, but they seemed to know we were coming.”
“Then improvise, Thea. I’m trying to help you find your place here, but you make it difficult to keep you around because you never do anything right.”
I swallowed hard as I watched myself take those harsh words. Why wasn’t I saying anything?
“I will do better,” I promised.
“I doubt it,” he scoffed. Again, I remained silent. “I detest the fact that I can’t rely on you. You promised me your best effort, yet this is mediocre at best. Now, get out of my face.”
I turned and hurried out of the room. I accompanied my dream form down the darkened hallway, but I couldn’t see any details about where we were. My mind liked to fuck with me.
I paused when we stepped out of the building we were in into blindingly bright light.
“Saddle up. We’re heading out,” I demanded.
“We just got back,” another guard groaned.
“I said saddle up. We didn’t complete the mission.”
“Thea, you don’t have to prove anything to him. He gets under your skin to push you into reckless behavior for his own benefit.” I watched as my dream form glared at the man who said that to me.
“Kaz, we don’t have time for this. Saddle up. It’s an order.”
Kaz? He turned around and I nearly fell backward when I saw Kaz, my Kaz from Exile, mounting his horse. He looked pissed, but it seemed to be directed more towards the man who talked to me poorly. My eyes shifted to Kai when he walked over to another horse.
“Heading out again?” Kai asked with confusion.
“Our mission is to find as many elitist magic holders as we can.” I spoke coldly and galloped away with Kaz and Kai on my tail.
?????
Quickly, I sat up in my bed and sucked in a deep breath. What the fuck? Kaz, Kai, and I had known each other. Why had they always said they didn’t know me? My heart beat rapidly and sweat beaded on my forehead at the memory of the dream. Why were we the ones gathering elite magic and who the hell was treating me that way?
I begged the Gods to give me back my memory. When nothing came back to me, I reluctantly sat up and got dressed. Still, no magic stirred inside my chest. I must be too weak to use magic. Maybe after food and more rest, I would feel better, and that could be possible, so long as the trials didn’t happen today.
All the talking and laughter died down when I entered the dining hall. I could feel their eyes on me, but I didn’t look at them. I gathered a heaping pile of food and turned to find Nev and Haden. Only it was Cassius’ golden eyes that I found. He was standing across the dining hall from me. Immediately, I glanced down but could feel him watching me. I could barely stand being this close to him, and he said he didn’t want to be near me, so I made the only logical choice.
I headed out the door and went straight back to my room. I would eat and rest here until I could heal myself. The silence in my room was unbearable as I ate an uncomfortable amount of food. I stared at the wall of my room for most of the afternoon before falling asleep again.
When I woke up, I was sweating profusely once again. I couldn’t remember my dream this time, but my heart thudded rapidly like I was scared or had been fighting.
Enough time had passed that the sun was going down, so I stood and tried to heal myself, but nothing happened again. Sighing heavily, I struggled to stand up and pull my boots on. Like earlier everyone was watching me as I got my plate. I turned and saw Nev and Haden at our table. My eyes flicked over to where Cassius stood against the wall talking with another guard. I looked away before he saw.
“Where the hell have you been?” Nev frowned.
“My room taking another nap after breakfast. I’m just so exhausted.” I took a bite of the sausage and my stomach growled. I was somehow still ravenous even though I had eaten only a few hours ago.
“That was two days ago, Thea,” Haden said softly. “We tried to check on you, but you moved a bunch of shit in front of your door.”
Two days? I hadn’t woken up once in that time frame. I thought they must be kidding, but their concerned faces proved otherwise.
“Thea, we were worried you died in your room or something.” Nev frowned at me. “Glad that wasn’t the case.”
“Are you sure that was two days ago? I didn’t wake up at all and I still feel exhausted. I didn’t miss a trial, did I?”
