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Once everyone stopped laughing, we all got situated around the table. I signal the prospect to bring us a few more beers, which has my woman looking at me like I’m crazy because she hasn’t finished the ones she has. My chuckle doesn’t go unnoticed even as I try to stifle it by taking a drink. With a wink, I slide my hand around my woman’s chair and pull it closer to mine. She pretends she’s affected by how much closer we are, but I know better.
Awareness prickles, and I look up to see Princess has made her way over to Bull at the bar and is still on her bullshit. Her arms flail as her face scrunches up in anger at the fact that he is ignoring her. My eyes trail away when she turns back to us to glare. Prez and Vex sit with us with their backs to the bar. Which, if you didn’t know, is not something they, especially Prez, would typically do. We are safe enough in the clubhouse, but for the Prez to leave his back open to the room, relying on the ones sitting across from him to have his back, is a statement all its own. I look at Blaze and see he knows what Prez has done. His face is still in his mask, but his eyes shine with respect and understanding.
There is still tension in the air, but not as bad as before. The main room is filling. A few brothers, ol’ ladies, and club girls do a double take at our table filled with virtual strangers, which is never done. This table’s designated for officers unless invited, which everyone here was, but again, it’s the fact that Prez’s back is to the room that has everyone’s attention.
Prez clears his throat. “So, you guys get everything situated and scheduled?”
Prez looks over at me and then at his son. Vex stops talking to me about the prospects and looks at his Pop. Bellamy stiffens slightly when she realizes Prez’s eyes are on Blaze. His earlier weariness with his eldest son is gone. Good, because the vibes were fucking weird as shit. I get why. Their relationship started fucked up, and things got out of hand because of Princess more than once. Prez is stuck between a rock and a hard place regarding his kids. I’m glad he is making it clear to his son that he may give a little, but he isn’t to be fucked with. I smirk as they stare at one another. Blaze's eyes flare, but he pulls the emotion back enough to respond.
“Yeah, my guys are good at what they do. They’ll have you right as rain within a week.” Blaze taps his beer bottle on the table twice, staring into his father's eyes. Everyone at the table watches them. The tensions they both seem to want to keep high are messing up my damn plans. These fuckers need to stop with the pissing contests already.
My hand has made its way to the back of Bellamy's chair. She has slowly shifted her body towards mine; I don’t know if she realizes it. My thumb rubs circles on her bare shoulder, and the spark I always feel when our skin touches hasn’t lessened. It’s gotten more intense. I refuse to remark on her willingness to be close. This dangerous, beautiful, strong-willed badass of a woman is letting me know without words that she knows where my head is and understands. And knowing that has me feeling a sense of relief. Knowing we are on the same page has me puffing out my chest. I’m aware of the eyes of my brothers that linger on her a little longer than they should, and my answering glare makes shit fucking clear. She’s mine. A few of my taken brothers catch my eye, letting me know that my glare isn’t going unnoticed, and they’re amused as fuck by my response. But I don’t give a shit. Everyone in this motherfucker needs to know now she is mine and mine alone.
“Good, good. Glad to hear it.”
Prez takes a breath, looks down for a moment, and then looks back at his son. And has his full-on Papa Bear face on. Oh shit, what the fuck is he about to say or do? Please, for the love of…
“Listen… and before either of you flies off the handle, let me say this and get it out. I fucked up all those years ago. I made a choice. A choice I regret. I’ve… always regretted it. One I will forever regret because that choice made me miss watching you both grow up. I'll take your anger. I'll take your hate. I deserve it. If I could go back and take it back, I would. I loved your mother. Fuck, I still love the fuck out of that woman. But we live and learn, and I’m more than willing to pay my pennants. I may only be your sperm donor.” He winces, but doesn’t stop or give them time to respond. “But you are my children. That’s a fact. I know we didn’t start on the right foot, and you have written me off for being such a prick to your mother and then to you, Bellamy. Know that I’m sorry. I’m truly fucking sorry, down to the depths of my soul. You may not believe it, but I love you both with all that is in me, and I always will whether we have a relationship. Know that. I can’t fix what I broke in a day or in a single conversation, but I’m here. I’ll always be here, so when you are ready to talk, you come to me, and we can do that. You both have your opinions and have things you want to say…” He rubs his hands down his face and sighs. “My door is always open to either of you.” Prez looks at both his children, nods, and abruptly stands and walks away. We watch him go. He looks so fucking defeated. His shoulders are slightly slumped and his eyes are downcast. I’ve never seen the man look anything but the confident, no fucks giving president he has always been. Damn, this shit is affecting him something fierce.
“You two need to stop being assholes to him. You know what the fuck went down and why. You can’t say you wouldn’t have made the same decision to protect the person you love. You still have both of your parents to fix shit like this. Some of us…” Sin abruptly stops talking, gets up, and heads toward the back entrance of the standard room
“Fuck.”
Blaze says, staring off after Sin. His eyes are soft and conflicted. Many emotions run across his face as he stares toward where his youngest sister walked off.
“Yeah, I didn’t think about that either. We are officially the biggest assholes and siblings fucking ever. Damn it.” Bellamy says.
My brows furrow at the conversation. I tried to figure out their meaning, but understood enough to read between the lines. I don’t have to ponder if my assumptions are correct for long. Rocket plops his ass in a seat next to Bellamy, who’s occupied by thoughts of her younger sister. He leans back in the chair and stares with sad eyes at Bellamy. Her head is down, and she has her hand in her hair as her elbows rest on the tabletop. I move my hand from the chair and rest it on her back. I feel the sadness coming off of her in waves. I don’t remove myself from her space. I lean a little closer to her and rub circles on her back. She shivers at my touch. I don’t think about her responsiveness to my touch other than to comfort her. I want to take the pain away.
“Her parents were killed in an operation that went wrong about sixteen years ago. That’s the thing about The Organization: we work in families, so…” He pauses. I can hear the pain in his voice. Staring straight ahead, he continues, “Sometimes, we lose more than a single family member when we have a loss. For Sinclair, she lost her mother, father, and uncle in one night. Mostly, she is okay, but this shit with…” He waves a finger between Blaze and Bellamy. “It brings back some shit for her.” Well, shit. I look around the table filled with sad faces.
Rocket stands, but Pain holds his hand up to stop him. “I’ll go.” He looks at Blaze and Bellamy, who look like someone kicked their puppy. “She’s right, you know. Fix y’alls shit. He doesn’t seem like that big of a dick. I mean, he was the other night, but fuckin hell. You bust in here all crazy and shock the shit out of the old guy. His wires were all crossed and fucked up. No one, not even me, says you need to like his daughter. That bitch is fucking nuts.” I stifle my laugh because he isn’t wrong. She deserves everything she gets for how she’s treated her newfound siblings. With that, he turns and walks to the bar.
“Let's… fuckity fuck.”
I lean over to Bellamy and whisper, “Come dance with me.” It’s not a question. I look up at Blaze, and he nods, understanding what I’m trying to do. He recognizes and sees that I understand. And knows his sister needs help to get out of her head. I may not have known her long, but I know enough that she hurts when her team hurts, and they always come first. It's not much different from what I am and how I feel about my brothers. This means her being what she believes is selfish in this situation will eat away at her. She will second guess and blame herself for what she thinks she has caused her sister and teammate to feel. She needs to know that isn’t true. We all need to be selfish sometimes and not feel guilty about it.
Her head turns toward me, and her brow furrows for a second before they smooth out when she looks at her brother. The two have a silent conversation. My eyes stay on her because I want to get to know this little tornado of a woman more than I already have. I want all her quirks and flaws, all her pain and triumphs. Most of all, I want her heart. Maybe it's too fast, but I don’t give a shit. My soul recognizes its other half. And I’ll be damned if I don’t fight to make myself whole.
Having enough of their silent conversation, I ended it. Bell's hand in mine. I pull her out of her seat and into my arms. I don’t miss the small squeak she lets out or the surprise on her face. I look over the Blaze again and see amusement in his eyes. I have a feeling he has never seen his sister so girly.
I need to have her in my arms and get her out of her head. We are going to start on that dance floor. And where we end up, well… it will be a different dance.
Twenty-Four
BELLAMY
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My eyes watch him, unsure where he’s going with this. He has a silent conversation with my brother. And like the twin he is, Blaze sends me a knowing look. Even if I haven’t shared the sordid details, he knows about me and Taz. Blaze always knows. All the while, I’ve been analyzing the shit out of it, every word and touch. What I know and understand is that I’m not my mother; he is not my father, and it is okay to allow myself to feel something for another human being who isn’t my team or my family. I have spent the last two weeks thinking about him, dreaming about him, and wanting him. The worst thing that could happen is we don’t work. So, like I said the other night, motherfucking Yolo, this badass assassin, is taking a leap of faith onto a biker's cock.
I take a deep breath and try not to think about my sister Sin or the DNA I share with that ditzy bitch Princess. I want to be in this moment, at least try to be, even if Sin's hurt face keeps flashing in my mind.
Fuck.
Sin has always been good at keeping her emotions in check. She’s hot-headed, yes. But since coming here, she has been far more volatile. And I should have seen it coming. I should have recognized that this would bring back those feelings she tries to hide. Blaze and I should have seen she was hurting and talked to her. We were so stuck on our shit and feelings we didn’t notice our little sister was in pain, and we were assholes for not seeing it. Not understanding what this situation could do to her.
