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That motherfucking snake is going to get everything coming to her. Every fucking tear my baby girl has shed, that bitch will pay for if it is the last motherfucking thing I do. By the end of this day, my children will be rid of the cancer that is their mother, and I don’t feel a goddamned ounce of sorry for it. Although she won’t be dead, she sure will wish she were.
My mind goes to my woman and how one mistake has turned our lives into what they are today. I know I’ve fucked up in more ways than I can count. I have a shit ton of apologizing and groveling to do with Savvy and our daughter Bellamy. As I told Blaze and Bell before, shit won't happen overnight. Do I feel like an utter dick for making my Bell feel like she was beneath her sister and not an equal in my heart? Fuck yeah, I do. But as a father, and in the heat of the moment, I had one daughter here, and the other gone. I didn’t half the shit I’ve said, especially not in the way Bellamy took it. I really fucking didn’t.
When Bellamy left the office, my VP followed her, and I knew he would take care of my girl until she and he both calmed down. Soon after, the rest of the brothers followed behind my VP, at the request of my woman. She and Blaze let me have it and accepted it because I deserved it. My head was all fucked up and had me speaking before thinking. Which is what I told them earnestly. That is something my VP has been on my ass about lately. It is not usually an issue, but fuck me again. I’m blaming it on the heat of the moment. Thank fuck my Blaze was willing to hear me out and understand to an extent.
Blaze and I rehashed the history of me putting my foot in my mouth to his mother. telling her about what happened the first night. And then he begrudgingly gave me advice and explained that Bellamy was still on edge and thought I saw her as a lesser. Taz was right in saying my mouth can sometimes get away with me, and I know fuck, I see that shit. But fuck me. A man can only take so much shit blowing up in his face, unable to grasp what's up from down.
I have been drowning in my shit for the last month. I’ve been grasping for far longer if I sit and think about it. Meeting my kids, Savvy coming back into my life, and the shit with Beverly. Put a cherry on the proverbial shit pie of my life. Admitting my mistakes to them and myself was hard, but it needed to be done. As a father and president, I’ve not been the best at either lately. After tonight, I’ll work damn hard to fix the shit I’ve allowed to be broken and that I’ve failed to see. The three women in my life deserve nothing less than me at my best, as did my club.
Fuck, I need a damn drink.
Standing in the parking lot, I watch several SUVs pull in before the clubhouse doors. I can hear Beverly and her fucking mouth spouting off shit. I may not have put my hands on a woman before, but that bitch is begging to meet her maker at the end of one of my fists.
Shuffling behind me has me turning around. Savvy walks out of the clubhouse, and like she always does, she quiets the storm. Damn, that woman takes my breath away. Before my youngest daughter nearly tackles me, I make a promise.
Svetlana Petrov will be mine again, come hell or high water.
PRINCESS
The life I wanted was never meant to be.
?
The man I was supposed to marry was… is a monster. The anger I feel is all-consuming. I was so stupid not to see it sooner. I mean, I don’t think I could have. We only talked a few times on the phone I borrowed from the club girls. I initially called my mother to find out what was going on. My dad and the club were too quick to accept every word and explanation they were given. I didn’t know what proof they had that my mother was doing them wrong, only what Bellamy said. And she was an utter bitch, thinking she was better than everyone. Acting like her shit doesn’t stink. So yes, I called my mother to find out if what was being said was true and what I should do or could do to stop it, to stop her.
I should have listened to my brothers and father, but I truly believed that Bellamy and her mother had them snowed. I mean, come on, a woman he dumped over twenty years ago becomes some assassin because she has a broken heart and miraculously comes to save the day. I wasn’t buying it. That was until I discovered that my mother was manipulating me into believing she wanted what was best for me. She and Marco made me think I was finally going to be someone other than Gunner, the feared leader of LSMC’s daughter. I was going to have time to be something more. It was all a fucking lie. Savvy and Bellamy, who I still don’t like, weren’t the bad guys in this story. I can’t reconcile that with who they are and how they have treated me, and I guess I never will, or at least not right now. Things are too raw and confusing.
I know what everyone thinks of me, and I’m not disputing it. I’m spoiled, I’m entitled, and I’m a bitch. Growing up, I had to be. I will not act as if who I am and how people see me isn’t a choice I made. I choose to be who I am, and I won’t apologize. But this, to be bartered as if I am nothing. I don’t know what to do or say.
I don’t know what to do with these feelings of betrayal.
Marco scared me when he spoke to me, showing me his true colors. Him admitting to all the lies he and my mother concocted made me feel shame for the first time in my life. The thing he planned to do to me when we were married? The reality of what could have been had more tears being shed. The fact my mother knew all of this and didn’t care. The fact that she lied to me repeatedly, and I was dumb enough to believe her–trust her. Made me realize I was expendable to her. My life hopes and dreams were so expendable that she would sell me off for a bigger piece of the pie and keep her breathing. I do not doubt that if that man who came to save me hadn’t, or even if I hadn’t gone to her, she would be dead. And as much as I want to feel something. I don’t feel even a sliver of remorse for what awaits her at my father’s compound. I hate who she became and what she was willing to do.
I guess it’s true that what they say, you reap what you sow.
Forty-Eight
BELLAMY
?
With a broad and bright smile, I watch Sin frog-walk the woman who had a hand in obliterating my mother's heart. Of course, Beverly is running her mouth, threatening anyone who makes eye contact with her. She is screaming at the top of her lungs about how she and her husband's family will destroy the club and how we will regret this, blah blah blah. Sin laughs in her face and continues to march her ass to the hole designed for this reason–teaching people lessons. Lessons they will not soon forget.
My mother stands to the side, watching with a glint of amusement. Prez walks into the clubhouse a few seconds later with a crying Princess in his arms. Princess clings to him like she didn’t bring this shit on herself. I scoff at all the eyes filled with sympathy for her. I told her it was a bad fucking idea, but some bitches just don’t want to listen to reason. And I can’t find enough sympathy to feel bad for her. She wasn’t hurt unless you count her pride. So the waterworks annoy me. I’m not entirely heartless. I understand that it's a shock to find out your mother is a cunt, but being this dramatic about it is team too much.
Marco is dragged in next by one of Don Barone's men. Sammy looks over at me, and his mask slips when he gives me a smirk and a wink, but it’s back and firmly in place when his eyes connect with Taz. I roll my eyes and chuckle. Taz stiffens, pulling me closer to his side. I don’t think he realized he did it–it happened that quickly. My man isn’t a pussy, so you better believe he returned Sammy’s glare, causing me to choke on my laughter. Men.
Earlier, Taz explained to me they usually wouldn’t do a perp walk in front of the women and children, but with what Beverly did, the club deserves to see her downfall. They also need to see what happens when you betray the club. I chuckled at the twofer. My father, the fierce MC president, is making a statement, making it clear that he is not one to be fucked with, no matter who you are. The faces of the men and women she betrayed alight with retribution as she passes them. There’s no love lost between them and her, and she knows it. She shuts her fucking mouth when one of the older ol’ ladies walks up to her and slaps the dogshit out of her.
Once the fan fair ends, the officers and my team head down to the hole. When I walk into the hole, Beverly is strung up by the chains that hang from the ceiling. At some point, Marco must have pissed someone off because he’s strung up next to her, with his chin on his chest and knocked out cold. Both are stripped of everything but her dignity. And I chuckle when I see the disgraced mafia heir is packing. I burst out laughing.
“No wonder he’s so fucking pissed,” Taz says with a chuckle.
Everyone in the room chuckles in agreement. Taz pulls me to the side, leaving the torturing portion of the evening in the capable hands of father and mother. Without a word or permission from Gunner, my mother is in Beverly’s face. Without a word, she slaps the hell out of her. The hit was hard enough for her to lose a few teeth, which fell to the ground at my mother’s feet. Beverly attempts to strike out at my mother, but the chains only allow her to move so far. When she realizes she will not get payback for the hit, Beverly cackles like she isn’t the one whose life is on the line. Her head rises, and her eyes glitter with hatred toward my mother, and she attempts to kick out again.
“All these years, you have been pining for a man that was mine.” Beverly screeches. The verbal barb will do nothing but piss my mother off more.
Beverly looks over at my father. “You will always be mine. Whatever she doesto me will be nothing compared to what my family will do to you and everyone associated with this club. You don’t scare me,” she hisses. “The widow maker,” she laughs. “You are nothing. Gunner won’t let you hurt me. None of these men will. I may not be his wife, but I’m still his ol’ lady.” She looks at the tattoo proudly displayed on her forearm and then back at my mother. “Club law.” Beverly cackles, thinking she has one up on my mother. Not realizing we have no intention of killing her. She deserves what’s coming and has no clue what that is, but she will soon.
