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I wanted Knight in my life, not these tiny slivers of space and time.
I wanted to wake up in the morning with him by my side, to see his sparkling smile, his beautiful, god-like face turning towards me in the morning light. To feel his body pressed up against mine, his thick cock betraying his need.
And we would lie there for a moment, not doing anything about our lust for each other, but simply being there, in the moment.
Then we would fuck. In the bed, or the shower, or on every surface of the room; against the wall or the door, letting our passion run its course.
We would clean up, laugh over coffee and toast and fresh picked strawberries.
Our phones would beep and we would have to part, each to our own mysterious tasks, maybe still keeping our secrets but still sharing our lives all the same.
Him with his work with the Kings, and me with my girls and reporting to Rook.
And sometimes I would surprise him for lunch or he would whisk me off to a night of dancing and drinking and fucking in one of the private rooms of the clubs because we couldn't keep our hands off each other.
And then we would fall into bed together at night, only to explore secret places once again. To discover the thoughts we kept inside as we lay next to each other, hands pressed together, noses almost touching as the moon moved over the sky until it bled into the orange rays of the day.
I'd loved Knight ever since I could remember, and I would never be able to let go of that.
As we kissed, heartbeats pounding and mingling and melding for the first time in forever, I no longer wanted to escape my life here in Vegas, unless it was with him by my side.
The thought was frightening and electric and exhilarating and hollowed out a hole so big in my chest that the fear bubbled up and I wanted to burst with it.
Because he'd left me, he'd left me, he'd left me, even after his promise to make me the only woman he'd ever wanted to bind himself to. And then he'd fallen in love with another woman and had a child with her, even though his stare burned into me every time we were in the same room together.
I wanted to rip my lips from his and run from this room and never look back.
Panic crawling, fear bubbling, alarm exploding through me.
And yet, his hand fisted in my hair; his lips finally, finally, on mine; his tongue exploring; deep, halting breaths in between kisses, it all kept me in place. Grounded. To him.
I couldn't run, even if I wanted to.
I was trapped in between his chest and his strong arms, holding me in place.
And I knew in that devastating moment that I couldn’t kill him.
Even if Rook put a gun to my head and tried to force me, I couldn't pull the trigger. I loved Knight too much, and would never be strong enough.
"I've wanted to do this," he rasped against my mouth, "for so long."
"Why didn't you?" I was falling, falling.
"Good question," A dark voice broke through the haze of lust between Knight and me. There was a click of a safety going off, and Knight and I froze. "Why didn't you?"
Fuck. I forgot about this part.
SIX
"Don't do anything stupid. We don't want to hurt Tatiana," I growled out, shifting to put myself between her and the gun in Rook's hand.
"Me?" Rook snarled. "I'm not the one who's hurt Tatiana." He shoved the cold end of the gun to my head. "Get up. Off the mattress. I want you on your knees."
"Rook, don't." Tatiana tightened her arms around my neck protectively. "You promised."
"I made a promise? We made them. Together."
"I know, but I...I..." she faltered, then, "Don't do it." I felt her throat bob. "You can't."
