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I swallow hard. “What are you doing here?”
The form next to me stills for a second. “I-I couldn’t sleep.”
“I don’t know if you should be here – I’m a guest in your house and your brother wouldn’t be happy.”
“Please, I…” The bedsheet tugs again as Julie snuggles closer. “I can’t…”
“You can’t what?”
“I can’t stop thinking about our kiss. I want to do it again.”
Hot breath on my cheek is the warning before her soft lips brush across it. I tilt my head before she can find my mouth.
“Trevor will not be happy,” I mumble, an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach as naked legs brush up against mine.
Julie giggles. “Trevor will be jealous…”
“W-what?”
“He, um, he likes men.”
“He’s gay?”
“Yeah. But he keeps saying he hasn’t got time to date, so he’ll be jealous that I get some and he’s not.” Her hand skates over the skin of my abs. “And such a handsome man, too.”
Trevor is gay. He likes men. I don’t know why I’m surprised – he had me up against the wall in the barn. For him it wasn’t testing boundaries or experimenting. For him it was the real thing. What was it for me? My pulse starts pumping faster.. Am I…
“I, um, I’m not gay.”
Julie lets out another giggle. “I’d hope not!”
Surely, I’m not gay? After all, I’ve been married to a woman. But as the lips of this soft, sweet woman once again search for mine, I pull away.
“Julie…”
“I want…”
Her fingers trail down my chest. I grab her wrist before she reaches my boxers.
“We can’t risk Trevor finding you here,” I insist, and the urgency in my voice finally makes her inch away. I let out a sigh of relief.
9
Morning Blues
The bed may be comfortable, but I don’t think I slept at all after Julie snuck out of my bed. I heard Trevor get up to tend to the cows way too early for anyone sane, followed by Julie shortly after to clean the campsite showers and kitchen. In the silent house, I swing my legs over the side of the bed and rest my elbows on my knees.
The rain has stopped.
I rub my hands over my face. There’s an ache at the pit of my stomach.
Adam is hugging the purple teddy, in no rush to get up from the softest bed he’s slept in for days. I, on the other hand, am antsy and eager to leave the house before either of the siblings return.
* * *
“What do you think? Can it be saved?”
Adam tilts his head to the side, a cute frown between his pale eyebrows. “It needs to dry.”
