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“I like how you think.”
“Yeah, well, I like how you actually care. Can you give my brother a few lessons on being a better human? For being a smart guy, he’s surprisingly deficient in the ‘caring’ department.”
“I guess it’s like you said: no one’s perfect.”
The sun pouring through the windshield feels nice, and I enjoy talking to Kate.
I lean back against the headrest and look out at the view. Brock’s mansion is on the north side of Windsor, not far from the Isabella Heins Frederick Castle. I can see the castle’s round central tower, poking up past the tops of the pine trees.
Oak and maple trees line Brock’s driveway and are scattered across his manicured, vast lawn. The brightly colored leaves dance each time a breeze kicks up.
“True, true,” Kate agrees. “We all have faults. Sheesh, I sure messed up, getting into the jam I’m in.”
“You mean, the pregnancy?”
“Yeah. See… this is actually what I want to talk to Brock about. He’s my older brother, and he should give me advice about life stuff. Right? And I really need some advice right now. I can’t talk to our mother because she’ll be mad. Same goes for our stepdad, and my bio dad and his wife. Our family doesn’t do the whole baby-out-of-wedlock thing. For the Benson clan, it’s get married and have kids, or don’t get married, don’t have kids. There’s no in-between. Black or white, you know?”
“Life comes with a lot of gray tones.”
“Girrrl! You are so right. Gray tones. Like, everything in my life is a freaking shade of gray right now. I’m not kidding.”
“Why don’t you start at the beginning? How did you meet the father?”
“So, me and Sawyer met years ago. He was traveling around, living in a van, doing all this adventure stuff. Rock climbing, mountaineering, deep sea fishing. He traveled all over, but Long Island, where I live, was his home base. We dated now and then when he was in town. I had a major crush on him. But he always left to travel around. Oh, and he works on this big fishing rig six months out of the year. Up in Alaska. That’s how he has money to travel and explore on his months off.”
“He sounds like a neat guy. One of a kind.”
“Yeah… I guess he is. He’s interesting. Unique, for sure. Anyway, we finally got a little more serious this past summer. He was in town for months, and we were hanging out all the time. He rented an apartment right near the hotel where I work. Spending so much time with him was ahhh-mazing. Totally fantastic.”
“He’s the father?”
“Well, he doesn’t know that, but yeah, he is.”
“He doesn’t know?”
“I’m getting there!” She snaps her gum. “You said start at the beginning. Okay, so we spent this incredible summer together. It was like… I don’t know how to describe it. Like magic, I guess. I had this feeling like the whole world was sparkling. Colors looked brighter. Nothing could upset me. It was weird… You have a boyfriend?”
“No…”
“But you have had one. Do you know the feeling I’m talking about?”
“I mean. I can imagine it.”
“You’ve never felt like that?”
“Not really… not that I can think of.”
“Wow. It surprises me that you’re single. You sound like you’re probably pretty, and you’re sweet, so of course men are after you. You’re really not with anyone?”
“Nope.”
“Why not?”
“I could give a sob story, but this is about you.” I nibble the edge of my nail and glance out at the expanse of trimmed grass, foliage, and distant mountains.
I’ve never enjoyed talking about my love life, probably because it’s so pitiful: a handful of dates, even fewer serious relationships. Every one ended badly, with a lot of resentment on both sides.
“Let’s get back to your magical summer with Sawyer,” I suggest. “What happened?”
