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“Why are you ignoring me, Hanna? I don’t like to be ignored.”
I shake my head, disliking his brusque tone. “I have nothing left to say. I’m going home. Goodnight.”
“Don’t walk away from me.”
Zathex reaches out and grabs my wrist, caressing my cheek unprompted. I gasp and shove him inadvertently, skin burning from the shame.
“Stop it!” I tell him, clenching my fists. “How many times have I told you this? I don’t want to be with you. You’re just a mentor. Nothing more.”
For a moment, he stays quiet. At that, I breathe a silent sigh of relief. My pace quickens as I head for the exit. Maybe he’s finally taken the hint. There are so many other xaphans he could pursue. Why is he so fixated on me?
I’m not interested in romance. My ambitions don’t leave room for that.
To my surprise, Zathex hasn’t left. Instead, my rejection has only made him more persistent. He grabs me by the waist and turns me around forcefully. As I try to shove him away, his grip tightens on my arms.
“Why are you so stubborn?” he asks, shaking me by the shoulders. “You could have everything if you dropped this act and decided to be with me. I’d give you all the nodals in the world. All the jewels, gems, food, whatever you wanted!”
“No!”
He’ll hurt me if he backs me into a corner. He’ll strike me down if he gets me alone.
The fear coursing through my body makes me act irrationally. There’s a small dagger in my right pocket, a remainder from a training session where we practiced disarming an attacker. Reaching for it, I unsheathe it and drag the blade across the length of his forearm quickly.
Zathex shoves me away as he howls out in pain. In a frenzied panic, I dart away as fast as I can. My feet slam against the ground loudly as I desperately make my escape, clutching onto my bag as I sprint away from the training camp.
The ache in my muscles disappears completely as pure adrenaline takes over. I can’t think straight, I can hardly see clearly, and my heart beats erratically against my chest. Every time I glance over my shoulder, I anticipate Zathex’s looming presence to come and tackle me to the ground. He’s one of the fastest xaphans around.
Once I’m far enough away from the training camp, I finally come to a sudden halt. The muscle ache across my body soon returns and I’m struck with the gravity of the situation.
“That piece of…” I hardly have the breath to finish the sentence. Sweat trails down my forehead and cheeks, soaking the hem of my shirt. “Fuck.”
If I were to report what happened, no one would believe me. The last time I brought up a complaint with the xaphan superiors who oversee the training camp’s services, I was nearly laughed out of the room.
“Why would a xaphan even think to look at a human romantically?”
The xaphan, on the outside, appeared like such a beautiful creature. It almost makes me forget how cruel the words were as they fell from his mouth.
“Go on and keep to yourself unless you want to start some trouble. You don’t want to start trouble, do you? You won’t be able to earn your wings, if so.”
Grimacing at the memory, I rub circles into my tired eyes until I start seeing colors. Then, I start the journey home. The sprint has at least shortened my usual walk back to the settlement, but I’m consumed with an uneasiness that I can’t shake off.
There’s something watching me.
But as I look around, scrutinizing every shadow and noticing every movement, I don’t see anyone. I certainly don’t see Zathex pursuing me, but that does nothing to calm the storm forming within my chest.
What if he follows me straight to the settlement? What if he harms my father? What if he hurts one of my friends, or worse, our innocent neighbors?
“No,” I whisper, shaking my head. But as I reach into my pocket, I find that my dagger isn’t there. I must’ve dropped it during my frenzy to get away from Zathex. “Shit.”
My fingers start trembling. Instead of wasting any more time, I quickly start walking. I keep my arms wrapped around my body, fighting the chill, but the goosebumps course down my body anyway.
How could this be happening to me? I’ve been focused on my wings this entire time. I don’t bother anyone at the training camp, and I certainly don’t want the attention of the xaphans. I keep my head down and do what I’m supposed to do. I arrive, I do my training, and I leave.
My father warned me of times like this. From one hour to the next, life can change suddenly and without warning. He said he felt this way when my mother passed. One moment she was here, the next she was gone. And life wasn’t the same from then on.
“Who decides these things?” I wonder aloud. “There’s nothing fair about that.”
To rid my thoughts of Zathex, I think about my home. About my parents. About the life that awaits my dad and me once I’m able to get my wings. We’ll go far away from this place, far away from Zathex and all the rest of the xaphans who wish to keep us underneath their feet.
