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I walked to the coffee pot. "What are you looking at with such concentration?"
"Just looking for a place to live. I don't want a roommate because they usually suck." She smiled at me over the computer. "Unless they are very easy on the eyes and they buy me not just one quart of ice cream but three."
Her eyes dropped back to the computer. I stared at her in silence. She was always going to be leaving. I'd made the contract specific, two weeks and the agreement was over. At the time I'd had it drawn up, I'd more than once considered shortening the time to a week, figuring I'd be good and sick of my houseguest by then. But I knew one week wasn't going to be enough time for me to break old habits and regain my focus.
My dad's stupid chant shot through my brain. Laser focus. Ignore the pain. Win at all costs. There had been plenty of pain, excruciating pain that was for damn sure. And I'd definitely gained some of my focus back. I'd gotten more done in a few days than I had all month. But win at all costs? That was the part that threw me. How could I feel like a winner when all I could think about was what I was about to lose? In one week's time, Shay was going to walk out of my life forever. Nothing about that felt even the slightest bit like a win. Suddenly, losing Shay seemed like a really high cost to pay.
"Did I make the coffee wrong?" Shay's voice pushed me from my depressing thoughts.
I took a sip. "No, it's fine. I'm just thinking about business stuff. I've got to go see my dad today. I'll be back after twelve."
She closed the laptop. The notepad sitting next to it had a list of addresses and phone numbers scribbled on it. "That works. I've got to call some of these landlords. Then I need to go out for a few hours." She left the house every other day for a few hours but never said where she was going.
"Where you headed?" I never usually asked, figuring it was none of my business. Only lately, I'd been curious.
"Oh—" she shrugged. My question had caught her off guard. "Nowhere exciting. Just some errands. But I'll see you back here in a few hours. I hope the visit with your dad goes well."
She took her plate to the sink. I leaned against the counter drinking my coffee. She had to lean past me, nearly brushing against me as she lowered the dish into the sink. Somehow, my crazy ass thoughts had gone straight to the possibility that she left every other day to see a man, maybe her ex, the jerk who had left a bruise on her side. Maybe he'd sweet talked her back into his life, or maybe she had someone else. It wouldn't be a wild thought. Shay was the kind of woman men went nuts for.
Shay slipped past me, and I imagined myself taking hold of her wrist and pulling her back and into my arms. I'd strip her naked right there in the fucking kitchen and devour her with my mouth to taste every inch of her before driving my cock into her until she cried out in ecstasy.
"You all right, Archer?" Her light tone shook me from my thoughts again. "You're kind of fading in and out this morning."
I straightened and tossed the coffee into the sink. "I'm fine." I could hear the cold bark of jealousy in my tone, but I couldn't seem to stop myself. "We need to take this to the next level. I'm not pushing myself hard enough, and we're running out of time. I've been treating this like a damn vacation, a party, and that's over. When I get back, I want you naked and on my bed."
"If you say so," she said with the same amount of chill I'd just thrown at her. Which was fucking perfect. Now I was sending her into this secret lover's arms thinking about just how much she hated me.
21
A Mercedes with darkly tinted windows was leaving my dad's driveway as I turned the corner to his street. I lifted my sunglass to get a look at the driver, but the sun reflected off the window tint making it impossible to see inside. Dad was paying his oncologist to make house visits, but I had only seen Dr. Hersh in a blue Land Rover. Of course, it was entirely possible a Bel Air oncologist would have more than one car. I headed up the driveway.
I'd left the house before Shay. She had stayed in her room, most likely on purpose, just to avoid me. I'd let my mind conjure every fucking scenario of where she might be going to on her regular outings. She'd told me more than once that she didn't keep many close friends because she moved around a lot and because she'd had a few friendships that were slightly toxic, making them the kind of friends you were better off without. Still, I'd allowed myself the idea that she was just meeting a friend for lunch or coffee. But that possibility was weighted down in my mind, buried beneath the many other scenarios that made me want to punch someone. Jealousy was not a good trait for me. Since this was my first bout with it, I was slowly learning how to deal with it. A trip to my dad's was always a nice, icy splash of water to shock away any other thoughts.
