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“It’s hard when your kids start confiding in other people, isn’t it?” Billy washed another plate.
“Yes,” Bella sighed. “You get so used to soothing their hurts and telling them that everything is going to be all right that when they no longer need that from you, it feels weird.”
“I think they still need to hear it occasionally,” Billy said. “Even when they think they don’t.”
“The first year after Jay got injured and came out of the rehab hospital, he was so down, and in so much pain, that I really used to worry he wasn’t going to make it,” Bella confessed. “Every morning I’d go into his bedroom and just be grateful that he was still alive, and talking—even if he was telling me to get out and leave him alone.”
“It’s hard to see our kids suffer like that.” Billy rinsed another plate.
“I think that’s why I try not to be too intrusive now.” Bella looked over at him. “I’m scared to push him away again even though he’s feeling so much better.”
“I know just how you feel,” Billy said. “I walked out on my boys when they were kids and left them with their grandmother. I got lost in a bottle because I blamed myself for losing Annie and baby Rachel. I lost myself. And now I’m back, I worry about giving them advice sometimes because what the heck do I know? Why should they listen to a guy who wasn’t there for them?”
Bella patted his cheek. “But at least you came back. That was a brave thing to do.”
“I don’t know about that.” He smiled down at her. “It just seemed to happen.”
Bella snorted. “With Ruth Morgan involved, I doubt that. Your mother is a magician. She got all her family back to the ranch and saved it from being sold off.”
“Yeah, she is incredible.” Billy grinned. “Scary sometimes, but still remarkable. And we were talking about you and Jay, so how come I ended up monopolizing the conversation?”
Bella shrugged. “Because I’d said everything I needed to say, and was interested in what you had to say? You know, one of those conversation things that people have?”
“Oh yeah, one of those give and take things, right?” He let out the water in the sink and quickly rinsed off the rest of the silverware and plates so that he could stack them in the industrial-sized dishwasher. “In my family it comes down to who shouts the loudest, and Blue usually wins that game.”
“Jay talks to Blue.”
“Which is probably good for both of them.” Billy closed the dishwasher and wiped his hands on his apron. “None of us can really understand what it must be like to be in a war.” He checked his watch. “Are you going to tell Jay about what happened with Axel?”
Bella made a face. “I suppose I’ll have to.”
“I think it would be wise,” Billy agreed. “Aren’t he and Erin moving into a new house up the street after they get married?”
“What’s that got to do with it?”
“Won’t you be here on your own?” Billy held her gaze. “What if Axel decides to come back and try and break in?”
She shrugged. “Jay’s got this place wired up like a bank vault. Nothing can get in.”
“Bella . . .” Billy put his hand on her shoulder and she covered it with her own.
“It’s okay, really. I’ll tell him what happened when he comes down, and if he wants to go all Navy SEAL on the guy, it’s on you.”
“Nate won’t let him do that.” Billy grinned. “Well, I hope he won’t. Do you need help tonight?”
“I think I’m good, but thanks for offering.” She went on tiptoe and planted a kiss on his lips. “Thanks so much for everything you’ve done today. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it.”
“You’re welcome.” He kept his hand on her shoulder. “If you can’t get anyone to help out, please call me.”
“Like you have time to help me everyday,” she gently mocked him.
“I meant what I said earlier. The boys are running the ranch really well, Mom cooks for the family, and there’s a chef for the guest dining room. I struggle to find enough to do everyday.”
