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She was putting on a strong front, but it was more than obvious that she was scared to death, even if she smiled through the fear.
The doctor gestured for me to move toward the hallway. I stepped out of the room to join him.
“We’re going to have to take her in for an emergency cesarean,” the doctor explained quickly and quietly. “The baby’s heartbeat isn’t good. The decelerations are very concerning. We need your consent, though.”
I felt tears, the stupid traitorous bastards, sting my eyes.
“Anything,” I said. “Anything you need, do it. Make sure that they’re okay.”
The doctor slapped me on the shoulder.
“We’ll make sure they’re safe, Rome,” he promised. “I know this is stressful, but you need to be on your game. You need to be the strong one…because she’s already freaking out.”
I was glad that this particular doctor was there today.
We’d met with him twice, but not because we were looking for him as a doctor, but because we’d gone in twice over Izzy being alarmed that the baby hadn’t moved in a few hours, and the particular doctor was the on-call one that was there to see any patients that showed unexpectedly.
“I’m good,” I told him, lying through my teeth.
I wasn’t good. In fact, I was freaking out right along with my wife.
And yes, I do mean wife.
Last week, Izzy had surprised me.
She’d shown up, dressed so cutely, demanding to be married before she had my baby, that I hadn’t been able to refuse.
Which led us to getting married at the courthouse with her brother on FaceTime to give her away.
Now, I was more than glad that I got to be her person. To be the person that she leaned on in times of need.
I looked over at my wife, who was staring at me with such a horrified, lost expression on her face that I felt everything inside of me still.
I was scared.
So goddamn scared.
I didn’t want to lose another baby.
I’d just come to terms with having him or her. I wasn’t sure I would make it, and I knew without a doubt that Izzy would break.
There was no way I could lose her.
I loved them both with all my heart.
“I’m here,” I assured the doctor. “And I have my shit together.”
I didn’t at all…but I could at least act like I did.
“Yo,” Liner said, interrupting us, coming out of the labor room. “Your wife is freakin’ the fuck out, and she wants me to bring you to her.”
I wasn’t sure why Liner was in the labor room. Honestly, he’d been there since the beginning, and I had a feeling that he was there to make sure I didn’t lose my shit and go postal on everyone just in case something went wrong.
Like right now.
I winced and turned back to the doctor. “Can I go in the delivery room with her? She’s going to lose it. You’re right.”
The doctor pursed his lips. “Normally all the preparation is done at the same time, but if you hurry and get your clothes on.” He gestured to the gown that was on the countertop. “And are ready to go in thirty seconds, you can come.”
The nurses were bustling around Izzy, unhooking her from monitors, and unplugging her from God knows what. All the while, my sweet little Iz was watching me with silent tears running down her face.
I didn’t waste time.
I also didn’t complain that the stupid pants were eight inches too long, and the booties they gave me to wear only fit over half of my shoe.
The shirt was even worse.
It was uncomfortable and on the verge of ripping.
Yet, I put it on and didn’t complain.
***
Izzy
“It’ll be okay, sweetheart.” Was the last thing I heard before I couldn’t remember a single thing.
Now, I felt like I’d been sucking on cotton balls for what felt like hours on end, and I felt something missing.
It took me a while, but eventually I was able to crack my eyes open and blink at the shining white lights above my head.
“I’m sorry I didn’t want you,” I heard whispered.
And for some reason, I knew that Rome’s words, my beautiful Rome with his great big heart, wasn’t talking to me.
He was talking to our child.
Our child that, only hours ago, had been in distress and had nearly died in my womb.
“She knew you wanted her, man,” I heard someone whisper.
I turned my head and found the room full of people.
Wade and his wife were there, though they were an entire room apart. Linc was there with some strange young girl that I’d never seen before, yet I somehow instinctively knew was his Conleigh.
Then there was Bayou, who was standing over Rome, looking down at him with a shit eating grin on his face.
Liner was there, as well as a few of the other brothers, but they were in the little alcove that led into the room, making it impossible to see who was there talking to Liner.
