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“What was it?”
“I don’t like talking about it,” she said, twisting her fingers together. “I knew I had to get away from him and his—” her stomach clenched with nausea “—his world.”
“And you weren’t tempted to go back with him when you found out you were pregnant?”
She shook her head vehemently. “Oh, absolutely not. If I didn’t belong in his world, there was no way a baby would.”
“Did he ask you back?”
She nodded. “Several times. But I think he was relieved when I said no. Tony wasn’t ready to be a father.”
“What about the baby? What will you do about a father figure for him?”
“I’ll deal with that later. Right now, I need to get through the pregnancy and delivery. My girlfriends have promised to help me through the scary first few months.” She felt a sense of dread in the pit of her stomach. “Then I guess I’ll have to move.”
Feeling his gaze on her, she looked up at him, wondering what he was thinking, what judgments he was making. “You probably don’t understand any of this. How I could end up with your brother and then pregnant with no husband? You would never get yourself into such a crazy situation because you don’t let emotions make your decisions.”
“You’re completely correct.”
“I’m also completely human. Are you?”
His mouth lifted in a half smile. “Unfortunately, yes. Human enough to want to finish what we started a few minutes ago.” He moved toward her, and she felt her heart jump into her throat. “Don’t worry. I won’t. I may be human, but I’m not ruled by my hormones. Good night, Lilli.”
Staring after him in surprise, she took a ragged breath. She felt totally off balance.
I’m human, but I’m not ruled by my hormones. That was part of the reason she’d responded to him. She had a gut feeling that he had maintained control of himself. He wouldn’t lose it unless he chose to do so. She’d never been around such a man but she could sense it about him and it made her feel secure at the same time that it knocked her sideways. She closed her eyes and pushed her hair from her face. She needed to stay on guard.
Chapter 5
Lilli’s hands were shaking as she turned onto Max’s street Saturday after working at the free dental clinic. She’d been so careful at work lately, always making sure to have someone walk her to her car. Afterward, she’d stopped to visit Devon Jones, one of the hospice workers who had helped her mother during her last days. Devon was now caring for his own father during the end stages of a long illness.
After she’d left, she’d noticed a black car in her rearview mirror. Even after making a few turns, the car remained behind her. She became so nervous that she’d taken some wrong turns and had got lost.
Glancing over her shoulder as she pulled into the driveway, she shook her head. Surely they wouldn’t follow her all the way to Max’s house. Biting her lip, she grabbed her purse and rushed into the house, leaning against the door as she closed it, and took a deep breath. She closed her eyes for a moment to calm herself. When she opened them, Max was five feet away from her, pinning her with a searching gaze.
“And you look like you’ve had some excitement,” he said. “Anything you want to tell me?”
She tried to shrug, but shivered instead. Despite the way he’d left her feeling last night, she couldn’t deny feeling ten times safer in his presence. “Not right now,” she said and headed for the kitchen. “Water sounds good.”
Her heart still racing, she took another deep breath and put her hand to her chest.
“Lilli,” he said from behind her and she thought she heard a note of concern in his voice. Hallucinating, she told herself. “Are you okay?”
“I will be,” she insisted, getting a glass and filling it with filtered water from the refrigerator.
He moved in front of her and studied her. “Where have you been?”
“Work, well, not really work,” she corrected.
“Your office isn’t open on Saturday,” he said, his expression growing suspicious.
“That’s right. But we volunteer for the free clinic downtown. I filled in for one of the other hygienists.”
“Downtown? Where?” he asked, clearly not pleased.
She winced. She had expected he wouldn’t approve of her driving downtown by herself, but no one had bothered her for days.
She told him the address and his mouth tightened. “Afterward, I stopped by to check on a hospice assistant who worked with my mother.” She shook her head. “Poor Devon. His own father is dying now.”
“Devon? What did this guy want? Did he ask you for anything?”
“No, but if he did, I would try to help him. He helped my mother and I during a very difficult time.”
“This is what I warned you about. You need to be careful because people will come out of the woodwork playing on your sympathy and asking for help.”
“That hasn’t happened,” she said, folding her arms over her chest.
“Then what happened to make you so upset? Did one of Tony’s buddies show up?”
“Aside from getting lost, the only thing I can tell you is that someone in a black Mercedes followed me most of the way home.”
He swore under his breath. “That’s it. You’re quitting.”
She gaped at him. “Quitting?”
“It’s the only rational thing to do. Each day that passes I learn more about how deeply Tony was in trouble. You can stay here until the baby is born and you’re ready to move and say goodbye to your contacts here. I’ve told you before. You need to be on guard in every way. People will try to take advantage of you.”
She shook her head. “I can’t quit. I need the income for the baby. As you said, babies aren’t cheap.”
“Money won’t be a concern after you sign the agreement.”
She supposed she should have been intimidated by him and part of her was, but she refused to give in to it. “I’m not signing that stupid agreement and I’m not taking your money.”
“You would turn down a good life for your child in exchange for pride.”
She scowled at him. “That was low. The point is that I’m not giving control of my child to you or anyone else. I don’t know you well enough. You may give the impression of being very responsible, but at the same time you’re bitter, cynical and a workaholic. I want my butter bean to be happy. You may be loaded, but you don’t seem very happy.”
“Butter bean?” he repeated.
“Yes, butter bean. An affectionate nickname. Something you wouldn’t understand.”
Exasperation crossed his handsome face. “Most women would kill to have the equivalent of an extended vacation here, but you’re fighting it every inch of the way. Have you always been this disagreeable?”
“I think you just bring it out in me,” she said.
“Do you have a will?”
“Yes, I do,” she said.
“Have you chosen a guardian for you child?”
She resisted the urge to squirm. “I’m working on it.”
“Why don’t you name me the guardian?” he demanded.
She bit her lip. “Because you don’t smile enough.” As soon as she blurted out her answer, she knew it sounded a little crazy. “I think kids need smiles and lots of hugs.”
He moved toward her. “I think you trust me more than you admit.”
Her heart flipped. Maybe she did. There was something so solid about him. “I trust you to be rational, but some decisions should be more emotional.”
He lifted an eyebrow. “Are you saying your emotional decisions have turned out well?”
“Not all, obviously,” she said. “But it was at least partly an emotional decision for me to take a leave of absence from work to take care of my mother during her last months. I wouldn’t trade anything for the time I had with her, because I won’t have a chance for that again.”
A trace of sympathy softened his hard gaze.
“If you were my son’s guardian, what would you do if you had to choose between attending an important business meeting or going to his T-ball game?” She shrugged. “I’m going to make a wild guess and say you’d choose the former because it would be the more rational decision.”
“You make a good point, but most parents have to balance career and children’s needs. There’s no reason I couldn’t learn to do the same thing.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “How would you do that?”
He looked surprised that she would question him. “Why do I feel as if I’m being interviewed for a position?”
She nodded. “Maybe you are,” she said. “You’ve pretty much asked, no, demanded to be the baby’s guardian in case of my death or path to self-destruction. If someone asked you to give them the most important job in the world, wouldn’t you interview them? Probably conduct a background search. Ask for references.”
He gave an incredulous laugh, his teeth gleaming brightly in contrast to his tanned skin. “I don’t know whether to be offended or—” A cell phone rang and his smile fell. He pulled the phone from his pocket and checked the number. “Excuse me,” he murmured. “Yes, Rena?” He paused and shook his head. “I’ve sent a donation for the event tonight, but won’t be attending.” He listened for a moment. “I’m sorry they’ll be disappointed. Hopefully the money I sent will soothe some of their pain. Okay. Have a good day.”
He turned off the phone and turned back to Lilli. “Sorry that was my cousin Rena. She thinks I’m a recluse and she’s determined to get me more socially involved.”
“But you don’t want to,” Lilli included.
“This will be a boring chicken dinner with a silent auction afterward. I get enough social involvement at work. And I’m not stingy with my donations.”
