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Duncan swore causing Tess to flinch at his cruel words. He didn’t like scaring her. Seeing her reaction upset him. Her first sexual experience had turned into an awful encounter, and he’d been the one responsible. His first sexual experience would remain with him always. Her cry of pain would stay with him always.
He got up from the bed to pace. His thoughts were killing him. He was fighting with the need to walk out and not look back and the need to take her. She deserved some happiness. Her father didn’t care about her. He saw that more clearly with every passing second. She had no one in this world looking after her.
Duncan paced oblivious to his nakedness. This changed everything in their agreement. He’d never deflowered a virgin before. It was part of his rules to stay well clear of them. They caused too many problems. He preferred experienced, welcoming women who knew the score. He couldn’t walk away carrying on with his own life like he’d planned. Tess was his responsibility. His to care for.
Every other person in her life had given up on her. The file he’d acquired on her made more sense to him now.
Tess Williams, Tess James, had no one but him.
Duncan stared at her as she laid her head on the pillow with tears seeping out of her eyes. She should have someone to lean on.
His heart broke that little bit more.
He began pacing once again. No matter how much he thought or paced, he’d hate the way this night panned out.
He stopped in his pacing when he heard Tess moving. He turned and saw she’d gotten a robe to cover herself. She appeared so small and fragile, compared to moments ago when he was about to make love to her. Her hair was a rumpled mess. She still looked as sexy as sin. He wanted her so bad. But there was something else inside him that he couldn’t describe.
The desire to rub his chest was strong. His heart ached for the woman before him. There was so much that needed to be said. Instead, she stood with her head bowed waiting for him to talk.
He wished he knew the answers.
Duncan shook his head. His thoughts were threatening to drown him in a sea of emotion.
“I’ll go to another room for tonight. You need your rest.” Duncan went to her capturing her face between his hands. He stared into her tear-stained gaze. “We’ll talk tomorrow. Get some sleep.” He kissed her head then left the room. Duncan didn’t trust himself to spend the night with her. He felt too raw at the situation already.
You’re falling in love with her.
Like so many times before, he cut the thought off.
****
Tess watched him go. She walked into the bathroom and ran herself a bath. In many of the books it said a warm bath would ease any pain. The tears dropped off her cheeks. She let them. It had been way too long since she’d cried. When there was enough water in the bath, she dropped the robe and got inside.
She eased back allowing the heat to do its job.
Once the bath was finished she got out, dried, and wore the robe to bed. She lay curled up on the side of the bed where they had begun to make love. She felt so alone. Her father had never spent the time to tell her these things. With no mother either, she’d been on her own in everything. Up until that moment she’d never felt as alone as she did now. Duncan was the first man she’d let pass through her defences.
Her heart ached for what had happened. She refused to believe she could love a man who hated her innocence. Her pillow was little comfort. As she lay on the bed, she knew there was no one else to hold her. For the first time in her life she craved the touch of someone else. Where was her white knight?
No answers came to her. She cried throughout the night wondering what was wrong with her. What had she done wrong, and why was her inexperience such a problem?
When sleep refused to come she got up and went to the window. The moonlit sky greeted her. She held onto her pillow hoping for peace to claim her. The stars began to disappear as she thought about her night with Duncan. In all her life she’d never behaved with such wild abandon.
It was the first time she finally let go, and she felt as if she’d been cast aside. Tess watched the sun come up basking in the light morning glow. She heard people moving around the house, but she didn’t want to see or speak to anyone; so she stayed sitting in her robe looking over the grounds.
Vibrant flowers in a variety of colours covered the gardens. It was a summer wonderland, the smells so wonderful and romantic. She saw a patio in the middle of so much beauty. She thought it would be the perfect location for a wonderful romantic meal for two.
Romance, she thought.
Something she wouldn’t be experiencing for some time.
She laid her hand against the window pain. The hours passed by. Tess refused to move from the spot. Her pillow was her only lifeline.
Chapter Twelve
When Duncan had woken the following morning, he’d walked past his bedroom and gone straight to his office. He’d struggled to sleep after the nightmare the night before. Tess didn’t make an appearance, and he left her. At around lunchtime his housekeeper, Grace, walked in. She slammed his coffee tray down on the desk.
“What’s the matter?” he asked not taking his eyes away from the screen.
“What’s the matter? You’ve been married less than twenty-four hours, and you’ve managed to ruin that poor girl upstairs.” Grace had her hands on her hips.
“Tess is fine. Feed her something.” He shook his hand at her dismissing her.
“She’s not come out of your room. The gardener has come to the kitchen to tell me a black haired woman is sitting in a robe at the bedroom window. She’s holding a pillow.”
Duncan stared at Grace. “She hasn’t come out of the room at all?”
“No. She doesn’t even respond to the knocks on the door.”
He ran fingers through his hair.
“I’ll go and talk to her.”
“You’d better. She’s not like your usual women. You treat this one with care. I don’t care how much it takes. I’ve got a sixth sense for this kind of thing. Treat her well, and you’ll reap the benefits. Do you understand?”
Grace had been one of the few women who refused to be pushed around by him. He adored her loving nature and the way she wasn’t afraid to say what she thought. Duncan found her briskness refreshing after spending quite a bit of time with men who liked to kiss his ass. Duncan nodded his head then made his way up to the bedroom. He saw it was lunchtime already.
He opened the door to his bedroom. Tess sat at the window, the pillow clutched in her fingers. She looked smaller than the night before. One of her legs peeked out of the end of the robe. For several minutes he looked at her leg remembering the feel of her underneath him. Then her scream permeated his mind cutting off his thoughts. He closed the door noisily making her aware of his presence.
He saw her stiffen, but she remained sat looking out the window.
“You’ve not been down for breakfast,” he said, folding his arms. She kept her gaze out the window.
“I’m not hungry,” she said, pulling her robe more tightly around her.
Duncan was entering new territory, and he didn’t like it. She didn’t acknowledge his presence at all.
“Starving yourself is childish and ridiculous.” He didn’t know what else to say.
“I’m not hungry. If I were, then I’d eat, but I’m not hungry.” Her attention remained out of the window.
He rubbed his eyes. He didn’t know what to do. Last night had been one of the worst night’s sleep he’d ever experienced. Her cry of pain still echoed around his head. His beautiful wife, a virgin—he still found it hard to believe.
They’d been close last night. The chemistry had burned brighter between them. Yet, all that passion was dead at the moment. He felt lost with the way she blanked him.
“We need to talk about last night,” he said as he moved closer to where she sat at the window. The closer he got the tenser she became. Her fingers were white-knuckled on the pillow she held in her hands.
“No, we don’t need to talk about it. I was a virgin last night. Then you pushed inside me, and now I’m not. You didn’t like it, so you left. Fine. There is nothing else to discuss.” She kept her head turned away from him. He couldn’t see what she was thinking about or how his reactions last night had affected her. Her voice held all the hurt.
She thought he didn’t like it. It was far from the truth. He’d liked her innocence too damn much.
“I reacted too harshly,” he said. Tess snorted interrupting him.
“Don’t worry about it. They say when you lose your virginity it should be a memorable night. I can promise you last night will be hard to forget.”
He physically winced at her words. All his lovers had praised him on his skills in the bedroom. Duncan had spent years learning the art of love. He liked being a generous, considerate lover. For the first time ever the woman who happened to be his wife had commented on his lack of skill.
