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But right then with Wolf, I was trapped as I had ever been, by someone who was at least five times stronger than anyone who had ever held me down before, and I didn't panic. Maybe it was because a large part of me was aware that he would let me go if I so much as stiffened, that he'd rather tear off his own arm than make me fear him. Maybe it was because my body felt high off of desire. It was so overwhelming, so unexpected that I couldn't even think to fight it. All I could do was experience it: the heavy pressure at my lower stomach, the fluttering heartbeat, the hyper sensitivity of my skin, the way my sex felt like it was clenching every time his fingers sunk in slightly.
Wolf let out a growl, his hands slipping down my back to grab my ass roughly. He used it to prod my legs to wrap around his hips as his own pulled in and crossed underneath me. As soon as my pelvis dropped down, I could feel his erection pressing hard into the juncture of my thighs. I let out a surprised groan, my lips pulling from his violently, my eyes snapping open.
Wolf's eyes opened more slowly, watching my face for a second, trying to gauge my reaction. I, myself, had no idea how to feel right that minute. As if maybe sensing that, Wolf's hips rose up into mine, making his cock press into me, drawing another moan and bringing with it a rush of wetness. My mouth parted on a rough exhale. "You good?" he asked, his voice sounding even more gravely than usual. I felt my head jerk out an awkward nod as my hands fisted into his shoulders. His hands moved from my ass and slid to my hips, using them to stroke me down his hard length again. My forehead fell to his. "Ride me, Janie," he urged, his hands gentling on my hips, making it clear I was in control.
I sucked in a deep breath and lowered myself down on him again. I did three strokes before I paused. "You alright?"
"This won't do anything for you," I objected, seeing the unfairness in the situation. I could come from a little friction; he wasn't very likely to do so. "It's kind of a one-sid..."
"Shut up," he said, shaking his head.
"Seriously, it's not..."
"Said shut up," he growled, his hand closing around the back of my neck and dragging my lips back to his, kissing me hard and deep. So I guess I missed the threat in 'shut up'. As in 'shut up or I will shut you up'.
But that didn't matter. What mattered was his tongue sliding over mine, his teeth nipping into my lip, his hips thrusting up into mine, offering things I had never allowed myself to want before. But I wanted. I wanted like I didn't know was possible. I dropped my hips down and I rode him, slow and uncertain at first, gaining in confidence and desperation as I felt something building deep inside, making the pressure in my core hit the point of pain, having the gasps and groans bursting from my throat radiate out through the quiet woods.
I felt it then, a suspended sensation that promised oblivion if you pushed past it. But in that moment, I wasn't sure I could. I knew there'd be no going back. Things would be different. "Wolf, I..." I said, pulling back to look at him, shaking my head, not sure how to explain my uncertainty.
Wolf gave me a small smile and thrust upward one last time, making my body erupt into an orgasm that had me crying out his name, my entire body shuddering hard as the waves crashed almost viciously through my system. A part of me was aware that his arms had gone around me, anchoring me to him, but I didn't fully appreciate it until I collapsed against his chest, my face buried in his neck, and felt them tighten around me. His fingers went up and sifted through my hair as the aftershocks worked their way through me as I clung to him tightly.
There had been times... before when, a young teen and hormonal as all hell, I had experienced the pleasure that was a self-induced orgasm. But my body hadn't felt that in the better part of nine years and every nerve ending felt frazzled as I tried to steady my breathing, tried to slow my heartbeat, tried to not analyze what happened.
"Don't think," Wolf's voice said quietly and I felt a shiver course through me. "It's good," he said when I didn't respond. "Let it be good."
Let it be good.
Could it really be that simple?
I wanted so badly to believe it could. And, nestled deep in the woods far away from anything and anyone, the arms of a fiercely protective man around me, it almost felt possible.
I closed my eyes tight and let myself believe. If only for the moment, I let myself have it without thinking about it, without analyzing it.
"What about yo..."
"Shut it," he said, but his voice sounded calm, almost sated. Which wasn't possible seeing as I was the only one who got to have an orgasm.
"But you've got to be uncom..."
"Woman," he growled and I felt a laugh burst from my chest. He pulled me backward suddenly and watched me laugh. "I was wrong," he told me when I trailed off.
"Wrong about what?" I asked, my head cocking to the side.
"Not cute," he said, shaking his head.
"I'm not cute?" I asked, feeling a sinking sensation inside despite the fact that I had argued with him about calling me cute in the first place. I realized suddenly that I did want him to think that. I wanted him to think I was cute. It mattered. It shouldn't have, but it did.
"No," he said, looking almost grave. I know my face must have fallen because his lips quirked up. "Not cute," he said, hand going to my cheek. "Beautiful."
