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"Some men deserve to die, Wolf. That's why I believe in capital punishment. Some men shouldn't be given the luxury of breath after the shit they have done. But that shit can take twenty years. Twenty years sitting in a cell eating taxpayer money, wearing taxpayer money. If there's one thing this job gives you when you've done it as long as I have, it's perspective. I'd rather pieces of shit like Lex Keith meet a bloody end on the street then live large in a cell, still running an enterprise built on blood and pain from behind those bars. These streets are safer for women with that bastard good and dead. And if by making that happen, you bought your women a sense of security and closure she never would have had any other way, well then, I'm happy for you both."
With that, he walked out, coming back a few minutes later with my clothes.
Ten minutes later, Reign was walking into the station, trying his best to hold back a smile.
"Thank fuck you're free, man. I got my hands full with my own woman. I can't be dealing with yours too. She had Summer and Lo doing target practice yesterday. I saw my life flash before my eyes."
"She's a good shot," I objected as we walked out toward my waiting truck.
"Someone must have taught her the coin trick," Reign said, giving me a look from the passenger side as I turned the truck over. "She's doing alright, Wolf. I know you were worried. Keeping busy kept her sane. And having Repo to keep her company when she couldn't sleep helped too. In fact, left the compound to find them both passed the fuck out on the couch in front of half-finished beer and a mostly full bowl of popcorn."
"Good," I nodded, turning off toward the compound.
"Know we don't do this cheesy shit," Reign said when the silence stretched. "But when Summer was new in my life, you told me she was a good woman. For you, that was practically a fucking conversation so I figured now that you got yourself a woman, I should say something..."
"So say it."
Reign snorted. "I like her for you, Wolf. Someone told me a year ago that you'd end up with someone like her, or anyone at all, I'd have said they were crazy. But I could say the same thing about Cash and Lo."
"Reign..." I laughed, rolling my eyes at him.
"Fuck off. Ain't used to this sharing shit. What I'm saying is, she's good for you. And you're sure as fuck good for her. Tame her a little bit."
"Janie? Tame?" I asked, smiling as I parked the truck. "Wouldn't want her tame," I added as we climbed out of the truck and crossed toward the front door.
And I wouldn't want her tame. Did I like that she felt comfortable enough with me to show a softer side on occasion? Yes. But I didn't want her because of her potential to be something other than what she was. I liked the whole package. I liked the foot-in-mouth comments. I liked how she could fight over the most asinine little things with as much passion as the shit that really mattered. I liked that she was capable in everything she put her mind to, but was open to suggestions to get better. I liked that she was a shit cook but a fucking spectacular crime-scene cleaner. I liked that she obviously had no experience letting men in and that scared her and she was hesitant, but she didn't try to push me away either.
It was a rare thing in life to find the person who complemented you, who was strong where you were weak, patient where you were restless, giving when you were all used up. That was what I had with Janie. It wasn't that one of us was always strong or patient or giving, it was that we both had it in us to pick up the slack the other had to put down.
I was under no alpha-man delusions. She would fight me tooth and nail. She would rage and rant and spit and claw. There was no controlling her, no taming her. But there was nothing more beautiful that a wild animal. And there was nothing more heartbreaking than seeing one of those wild animals broken in a cage.
"She needs to sleep," Repo said, eyes on me as I walked in. He was squished into the corner of the couch shirtless, Janie taking up all the space even with her tiny frame.
"So do you," I said, nodding at him, taking in the red eyes and blue smudges beneath them. Like Janie, he could go the better part of a week without sleep at times due to some trauma he still hadn't felt comfortable sharing with any of us and maybe never would.
He nodded, moving Janie's feet off of his legs, and standing. "Good to see you free," he said, nodding at me, then moving off toward his room.
"Well, I'll leave you to it," Reign said, giving me a knowing smile. "But make sure you ask her what she came in here and declared to all of us when she got back from seeing the Grassis yesterday."
"What'd she say?" I asked, moving toward the couch and crouching down beside her, brushing her hair out of her face.
"That's for her to tell you, but make sure she does."
With that, he was gone and we were alone.
I should have done the right thing and left her there, sat down in the spot Repo abandoned and let her get the rest she obviously needed. But I needed to have her close, pulled up to my side, head on my chest. Being pretty fucking sure you'd never hold the woman you cared about again, yeah, that did things to you. I needed her.
I reached out, slipping a hand under her knees and another around her shoulders, curling her into my chest then lifting her up. The jostling motion made her grumble in her sleep before her eyes snapped open at the motion as we moved toward my room.
