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"Oh, god," I hissed, slamming my heels down so hard that the impact ricocheted up the little icepicks and into my calves and knees as I rushed out from behind my desk, making a bee-line for the anatomy section. "Shit shit shit," I added, turning the corner, eyes looking around.
But they weren't there.
My panties.
He'd ripped them off.
But they were gone.
"What's going on?" Autumn asked, sounding only vaguely concerned since she was used to a bit of melodrama from me here and there.
"Nothing. I just... lost something," I said, going back an aisle in case they somehow got kicked around.
But they were gone.
Which meant some pervy teen stole them.
Or Sugar took them with him.
"So what have you been up to? I miss talking to you. Do you still have Jamie staying with you?"
"Mostly, yeah. Sometimes she stays with Savvs. Or they both stay with me."
"Good."
"You're worried about me."
"I don't like the idea of you being alone all the time," she corrected.
"I'm a big girl."
"Yeah yeah yeah. You can take care of yourself. Blah blah blah. I'm allowed to worry about you being all alone in your apartment, whacking your head on the cabinet, dying, and being eaten by cats."
"I don't have cats."
"That doesn't matter. When a single woman dies, cats appear."
"To eat their corpse."
"Exactly."
I laughed at that, big, loud, happier than I had been in a while.
And I got shushed.
Shushed.
In my own library.
I turned to find some college-aged kid giving me the stink-eye. Which only made me laugh harder.
"So, what? The only way to avoid being eaten by cats is to become not-single?"
"Oh, I know better than to hope you settle down, start wearing an apron, and cooking chicken pot pies."
"I have an apron!"
"That says Always preheat the oven before putting the meat in."
"It is still functional. And I do cook."
"Oh yeah?"
"Mhm. Last night, I cooked Spaghetti-Os. Did you know they come in adult-sized cans now? It was like finding out they were re-releasing French Toast Crunch."
"Peyton, be serious for a minute. I want to hear how your life is going."
"Well, I finally got my phone to stop correcting rosé to rose. So I have that going for me." At her sigh, I smiled. "I'm fine, Autumn. I still miss having you around, but I'm happy for you. And I'm never alone for more than like a day at a time. Someone is always around. Cooking me breakfast, washing my sheets, deep cleaning the bathroom. You know, being a much better roommate than you ever were," I teased, knowing she would know I was joking.
"Are you coming to dinner Sunday?"
"You say this as though I have a choice."
There was no choice when it came to Sunday dinner. Charlie could talk Helen into allowing one of the guys to have some slack if they had work, but other than that, the only excuse was you were too sick to get out of bed.
Besides, I would never pass up on Sunday dinner.
First, because food.
Second, it was family.
I didn't realize until I found the Mallick and Rivers clan that I had been missing anything. I had my sister. We were the world to each other. That was all that seemed to matter.
But then I got invited to Charlie and Helen's, and it was like my soul went Oh, there you are!
I never realized that I had been yearning for a family. And not necessarily blood. I had parents by blood. And it wasn't anything special. In fact, the only blood there was bad.
So it never occurred to me that I wanted a real mother and father figure. After having shitty ones.
Then there were Charlie and Helen.
They just filled a void I didn't know was empty. And because they were who they were, they were open, honest, accepting, and fans of whatever kind of crazy you brought along with you. They didn't expect you to change. They just loved you exactly how you were.
And I cherished that.
And whatever time we got to have together.
Even though they were only a relation of mine through marriage - and not even my own marriage - I found time to drop over there on my own. Help Helen cook. Discuss new cocktail options for Chaz's with Charlie.
Sunday dinners were my favorite though. When all the crazy from all our families got together. Adults and kids alike.
And since they had all the Rivers boys to rag on about getting wives, I was generally left alone about my chronic singledom.
It's good that you know what you want. And what you don't want. That was what Helen had told me when Rush had complained that I wasn't nagged about bringing dates when they were. These men, I swear they wouldn't know what they wanted if it walked up and slapped them in the faces.
"Is there a food theme this week?" I asked, knowing that Helen had been experimenting with that idea here and there. One week was - to the groans of all the very large, very hungry men at the table - tapas. Another, it was Chinese. Once, it was Mexican. And I thought I had died and gone to burrito heaven.
