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“Ease up, Eli,” Mark said, reaching behind the woman’s back and shoving his brother in the shoulder.
Eli held up his hands with a smile. “Saw an opportunity.”
“Oh, fuck off,” Mark laughed. “You couldn’t get your own date; there’s no way you’re stealing mine.”
The meal went like that for the better part of half an hour, the men throwing verbal jabs at one another, all of their speeches laced heavily with ‘fucks’ and ‘shits’ and ‘pussies’. Helen and Fee pitched in as well; their language was no more refined and I found myself smiling at that. There weren’t a lot of places, I had found, where my truck-driver mouth was considered appropriate for a woman. But it, apparently, was a welcome trait at Helen’s table
Ryan was the quietest, his barbs tending to be of the dry and sarcastic nature.
Mark and Shane seemed the most alike, both loud-mouthed and opinionated.
Hunter, Fiona’s husband, seemed a bit more staid, though no less foul-mouthed when he did open it.
Eli, while on the quiet side, tossed his opinion around in a way that landed with impact, leaving silence for a moment before someone came up with a comeback. There was something about him I didn’t see in the others. It was almost a darkness, an underlying intensity that was absent in his brothers.
The girls came in a couple of minutes later as I was willing my stomach to stretch just a little bit more so I could stuff in the rest of the green beans and the last roll. The conversation was then dominated by the incredibly confident and opinionated Becca, all the men seeming apt with her stories, no matter how long and rambling they were.
“No f’n way,” Mark said, shaking his head as I shoved the last quarter of the roll into my mouth.
“I take bets very seriously,” I said, meaning it. I didn’t have the money to pay them and in my old life, welshing bets meant more than just a loss of respect.
“You’re cleaning up tonight,” Shane said close to my ear, throwing an arm around the back of my chair.
“Good. I’m gonna need it for the gym membership to work off this meal,” I said, taking a deep breath.
After dinner, the men went into the family room to bullshit or watch a game and all the women just instinctively, even seemingly crazy independent Fee, started to clear the table.
I paused, a plate in each hand, and shook my head. “Anyone else see something wrong with this?”
Helen gave me a small smile as she reached for the fourth tray, two balanced on her forearms, one in each hand. Like a seasoned waitress. “Don’t worry. We all take turns cooking and washing dishes in this house. I just so happened to want to talk to you girls.”
Oh, great.
The interview.
I knew it would come.
I looked over at Fiona as Helen left the room. She gave me a shrug and followed her mother-in-law. “How’s your brother doing, Fee?” Helen asked as she scooped leftover broccoli into a plastic container.
“He’s with Darcy in, um, Arizona this week, I think.”
“On tour?”
“Wait,” Mark’s date broke in. I still didn’t know her name. “Darcy as in the Darcy? From the metal band?”
“Yeah,” Fee said with a casual wave. “They got together a little while back. Right before all that stalker shit went down.”
“That’s so cool.”
“Maya,” Helen said, finally giving me a name for the girl. “Where did my son find you?”
“Oh, ah…” Maya fumbled, looking around for an ally. But we were all in the same sinking boat.
“It’s okay,” Fee said, shrugging. “She knows you’re not actually dating Mark and she likes a good story. The more fucked up, the better.”
“He saw me working cleaning up the side of the highway,” Maya admitted, taking a dish from Fee to dry.
“Oh,” Ryan’s sweet little redhead piped in, “are you some kind of environmentalist?”
“No, honey,” Helen said, giving her a patient smile, “she’s an ex-convict. She was doing community service,” she said, looking at Maya for confirmation.
“Oh,” Ryan’s girl said again, face falling like it worried her to be around a criminal.
Helen put down her tongs and turned fully to the girl. “You do realize what our family business here is, right?” she asked, making me perk up. Family business? I knew about the bar and I knew the brothers each had their own businesses. I didn’t know that there was one they were all in on though.
“Helen,” Fee warned, intriguing me all the more.
“My husband is a loan shark,” Helen went on, ignoring the warning.
“Oh hell,” Fiona sighed, turning back to face the sink.
“And my boys? They’re enforcers.”
“Enforcers?” the girl repeated.
“Is ‘kneecap-breakers’ more clear for you?”
Fuck.
Of course.
Of fucking course I got myself wrapped up with a criminal family when I was just trying to lay low, bury my head, be on the straight and narrow.
