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“There is no such thing.”
Chuckling, Rowe helped unbutton and tug the sleeves off Noah’s hands, then he carefully wrapped his arms around his waist. He put his chin onto Noah’s shoulder and met his eyes in the mirror.
“Rowe…” he started and swallowed hard. Rowe held his breath, fearful of the words that were about to cross his lips. “I need a shower,” Noah said, watching him closely.
“Come on,” Rowe whispered, kissing his ear. He’d been given a reprieve, a second chance. And even though he wasn’t sure he deserved it, he wasn’t going to fucking blow it again. “I’ll help.”
He threaded their fingers together and tugged Noah into the hall and into the bathroom, watching over his shoulder most of the way, taking in the way Noah stared at him through narrowed eyes. He knew his friend was trying to decide whether to risk more of his heart and though Rowe didn’t know what words he was ready to say, he knew what his heart had been telling him for a while now. For years, if he were to be honest. He’d wanted Noah thirteen years ago and having the man back in his life had only proved that those feelings had never entirely gone away. He’d loved his wife deeply, but apparently, he had room in his heart for this man, too. It was time to step up.
He’d show Noah how he felt.
Smiling, he reached for Noah’s belt, letting his fingers slide against Noah’s abdomen as he worked open his buckle. The man had fantastic skin—smooth and warm and the trail of hair there tickled Rowe’s knuckles. He unzipped his jeans, hearing Noah’s slight intake of breath, then knelt to tug them and his underwear down and off. He ran his palms up the soft, hair-covered skin of Noah’s naked, inner thighs as he came back up. “I’ve got a thing for your legs. I’m looking forward to you wearing shorts in the summer.” He leaned forward and kissed the center of Noah’s chest.
Noah’s eyes widened in surprise for a second and it took Rowe a moment to realize what he’d said. It was the first time he’d made future plans, plans that had included both of them. Hell, it might have been the first time Rowe had spoken of the future since Mel’s death. Since that horrible moment, he’d not been willing to look ahead, to make plans for fear that it would all come tumbling down around him. But he did want a future and he wanted one that included seeing Noah every fucking day.
“Not feeling too beat up for sex, Rowe. Not caring about the rules now, either.” Noah gripped his arms and pulled him close, kissing his lips. “You planning to get back into the water?”
Rowe nodded, stepped back, and pushed his pants to the floor. “Go ahead and get in. I have to get stuff first.” He gave Noah his best, wicked grin and Noah’s dick jerked and his hand actually shook as he reached in to turn on the water.
“Hurry,” he said, voice raspy.
As he rushed into his bedroom to grab lube and a condom, he was aware Noah expected he’d be bottoming, but that wasn’t what Rowe wanted tonight. He loved fucking Noah, loved the tight, hot clasp of his body, but he wanted something different tonight. He wanted to know what it felt like to have Noah inside him.
Noah was already under the water when Rowe returned and as he set the supplies on the back of the toilet next to the tub, he flashed back to the first night Noah had arrived when they’d joked about showering together before. Shaking his head, he stepped into the tub and pulled the curtain closed. He should have realized two years before they’d ever gotten together that they shared something a lot deeper than friendship.
“Changed your mind?” Noah asked.
“Huh?”
“You’re shaking your head.” Noah tilted his own back and let water run over his hair. He reached for the white bottle of shampoo. “It’s been what, less than twenty-four hours since we decided not to touch each other anymore?” He lathered his hair.
Ahhh…that smelled so much better than smoke. Rowe smiled. “Did you really believe that would work?”
Smirking, Noah winked at him before ducking back into the water to rinse. “Nah. But I appreciate you trying.”
“I was an idiot. I’ve been an idiot a lot when it comes to you.” Rowe couldn’t resist running his hands through the suds sliding down Noah’s chest. “And no, I was shaking my head because I was remembering all the clues that we were more than friends all those years ago.”
Noah swiped water off his face and stared down at Rowe. “You were always more than a friend to me.” He slid his hands around Rowe’s back and down to his waist.
