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That was the thing, though. “He isn’t my man.” He was a man that I slept with sometimes. Okay, often, but that didn’t give me any real claim on him, despite his whole dead wrong speech.
“Not yet. And not ever if you don’t go over there,” she flung her arm carelessly behind her, nearly taking out Scott’s eye in the process, “and make sure those snakes know that he’s spoken for. And then speak. Loudly.”
I rolled my eyes at her and slid a glance to where she’d pointed, an act I immediately regretted. Rafe stood by the bar, half flanked by Betty Kemp and Helen Landon, with a beaming smile on his face. It took less than a second to see exactly what, or who, had his high beams on. It had to be the doctor because the woman was tall and very blond, and when she turned she was even more gorgeous than I imagined she would be. It was as if a pop star and a porn star had a baby and she became a doctor.
Oh and of course she was confident enough to press her impressive cleavage up against him, flashing a seductive smile that I couldn’t master in ten lifetimes. And the worst part? Rafe didn’t seem put out at all by the attention, because what red blooded male would be?
My heart sank at the realization that they looked perfect together. Totally perfect.
On the heels of that realization came another, that I was an idiot. A first class idiot to allow myself to even imagine, for one damn second, that there could be more than just sex between me and Rafe. I knew better. Hell, I’d warned myself against this before every encounter and still, it hadn’t done a damn bit of good.
He spotted me and instead of the guilty look I expected, Rafe smiled. He smiled. As if he hadn’t been caught red handed with his gaze down some woman’s cleavage. That smile, the one that I loved, I now hated. Because I knew it would be that smile he flashed when he gave me the old, it’s not you, it’it'ss me, speech. “Janey!”
I blinked at the sound of my name, realizing he’d seen me staring and called out to me. Probably so he could take porn star barbie home without feeling guilty about it. Screw that! I turned away from that ridiculously beautiful smile and looked for a way out, a temporary way out because the night wasn’t over and I had obligations to fulfill, whether or not my heart was slowly breaking inside my chest.
“Where are you going,” Ginger asked, barely missing me as she reached out for me.
“Be back soon,” I called out and dashed down the hall where the bathrooms were located and beyond so I could slip outside the emergency exit for a bit of privacy. And fresh air.
It was just past ten and the night was warm but cooler than expected, which I appreciated. The soft breeze went straight through the silky romper and cooled my skin immediately. I let out a sigh and turned my gaze up to the starry night sky, oblivious to everything but the twinkling lights and the ache in my chest.
“What, or who, are you hiding from?” I didn’t need to look away from the stars to recognize Nina’s voice.
“Not hiding, just enjoying some fresh air. And this view,” I added lamely because Nina was a pusher. She didn’t let anyone suffer in silence, especially if she could help.
“Yeah right,” she snorted. “Nobody has fresher trash air than Black Thumb. I’ll let Buddy know you said so, maybe we can put that on the Trip Advisor page.” I didn’t even dignify that with a response, though if it had been aimed at someone else I might have laughed. A little. “Well? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I told her honestly. “I’m just being stupid.” Maybe naïve was the more accurate word. Of course I fell for the first man I shared my body with, most girls did. They just usually did it when they were sixteen.
Nina let out another laugh that was amused and slightly commiserative. “Even the best of us are stupid when it comes to love and I’m talking about me.”
I barked out a laugh and shook my head, finally tearing my gaze from the sky to look at her. “Love. Everyone keeps tossing that word around like it means something, but I think you girls are just drink on the getting laid on a regular basis Kool-Aid.”
“Maybe so. Getting laid on a regular basis does help one’s outlook but this isn’t love blinders Janey. You forget I’ve seen the photos of you two and I’ve seen you together. You’re not just hot for each other, you’re into each other. Seriously into each other in a way that could mean everything, at least if you’re not stupid enough to screw it up.”
