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“ ‘Men are deceivers ever, one foot in sea, and one on shore, to one thing constant never.’ William,” she added with a nod.
“You’ve got that right,” Taylor muttered.
Victoria let out a loud sigh. “I shouldn’t be giving you advice,” she said. “But I would suggest that if Lucas gets the upper hand in your discussion, and you can’t come up with a logical argument, use William.”
Taylor perked up. “And what quotes do you suggest I use?”
Victoria nibbled on her lower lip while she considered what would be most appropriate. A minute passed in silence, then she said, “I’ve got it. ‘In a false quarrel there is no true valour.’ ”
Taylor repeated the quotation. Then she nodded. Victoria added another quote to use in the event Lucas’s temper still hadn’t cooled down. Taylor repeated the second quotation and nodded once again.
Victoria was yawning every other minute now. Taylor stood up and then helped her friend to her feet. Both women deliberately ignored the men. Victoria started to turn away, then stopped. “Don’t you wonder why he rode so hard to get here? Hunter said he had to have set some kind of record. He seemed in an awful hurry for a man who doesn’t want to be married.”
She whispered good night and then circled the campfire to get to the wagon. She didn’t look at Hunter. She knew she’d make a fool of herself if she tried to be civilized and say good-bye to him. She couldn’t be sophisticated tonight. She was hurting too much. Why in God’s name had she allowed herself to become so attached to him?
Victoria lifted the flap at the back of the wagon, stepped up on the crate, and then climbed inside. She was crying before she got the first button at the top of her dress undone.
Taylor was too restless to sleep. She didn’t want to sit back down by the fire and be ignored by her husband any longer. She’d had enough of his rudeness. She decided to go for a walk. She needed a few minutes alone to get her emotions under control. The anticipation of the inevitable confrontation was making her a nervous wreck. She would have to explain everything to him. He deserved to know the truth, and oh, God, that meant telling him about Malcolm. She honestly didn’t know if she had the strength or the courage. She turned away from her husband and hurriedly walked back to the stream.
The men watched her leave. Hunter was the first to speak. “Your face on fire yet? Your wife’s glare was hot enough to burn you.”
“Victoria was giving you the same attention,” Lucas pointed out. “Are you going to walk away from her?”
“I can’t see any other way,” Hunter answered. “What happened in Chicago?”
Lucas took the hint. Hunter didn’t want to talk about Victoria.
“Caulder was hiding out at his brother’s place.”
“You called that one.”
“I didn’t get him. A couple of bounty hunters got in my way. Caulder left in a hurry though. He didn’t have time to pack.”
“He left the gold behind.”
Lucas nodded. “I wired Travis and told him where it was. Caulder thinks I’ve got his fortune.”
“Are you going after him again?”
“I won’t have to,” Lucas explained. “He’s going to come looking for me. They took Caulder’s brother in. He was raving about Caulder blaming me for ruining his life. Said he’d get even. Can you believe it, Hunter? The bastard’s talking revenge because I cost him his career and his gold? He’s conveniently forgotten he ordered eight men killed and watched them die.”
“He ordered nine men killed,” Hunter reminded him. “You were also supposed to die, remember?”
“I remember.”
“And you’re still trying to figure out why you’re still alive, aren’t you?”
Lucas unfolded his legs and stood up. “Taylor’s stewed long enough,” he announced. He turned to go after his wife. “And I’m real curious to hear her reasons for coming here. They’re bound to make me crazy.”
Taylor had stood by the edge of the stream listening to the sounds of night. The crickets were out in force tonight. The sound they made in unison had a pulsating yet soothing beat. Every now and then an owl would add his voice, and Taylor was thinking how peaceful it was and how very beautiful the trees looked dappled in moonlight, when she heard a rustling of leaves being tread upon on the opposite side of the creek. The image of the huge mountain cat leaping at Victoria came into her mind, and she started shivering. Then she heard the howling of a lone wolf. The animal sounded close. Taylor whirled around and started back to the wagons.
Lucas blocked her path. He stood next to a tree not five feet away from her. One arm was draped over a low-hanging branch.
He hadn’t made a sound. She didn’t know how long he’d been standing there watching her. The noises of the night no longer frightened her. She felt safe again, and with that comforting feeling came courage.
She clasped her hands behind her back and stared up at her husband. He still hadn’t shaved. The beard made him look all the more rugged, and she suddenly wanted to kiss him so she’d feel his whiskers rub against her skin.
“I did a lot of thinking on my way here,” Lucas told her. His voice sounded mild, almost pleasant. “And I came to some interesting conclusions. Want to hear them?”
“If you want to tell me,” she answered.
He crooked his finger at her. She took another step toward him.
“You and your grandmother had everything all figured out, didn’t you? You weren’t lying to me when you said I was your plan.”
“We didn’t have everything . . .”
He wouldn’t let her finish. “I’ve been manipulated since the day I said I do. Isn’t that right?”
She shook her head. “I didn’t deliberately . . .”
Once again he interrupted her. “Yes, you did. Were you afraid I would say no if you asked me?”
“If I asked you what?”
“To be a father.”
He answered his own question. It was beginning to become a habit. “Of course you were afraid. You didn’t trust me at all, did you?”
With each question he asked, his voice became a little rougher and intense.
“Well?” he demanded.
“I’m waiting to hear my own answer,” she told him. “I might as well go back to the wagon while you have our discussion. You have it all figured out, don’t you?”
“Taylor, I’m trying to understand how I ended up chasing a wife and three children all the way to Redemption.”
She bowed her head. “I know I have a lot to explain,” she whispered. “I just need to figure out how.” And to find enough courage, she silently added.
He shook his head. “No, that’s not the way we’re going to do this. I’m going to ask the questions and you’re going to answer them. I’ve got quite a few stored up inside me. And no half answers, Taylor. I’ve run out of patience.”
“Yes,” she agreed. “I’ll tell you everything.” Tears welled up in her eyes. “And after you know the truth, I promise I won’t try to stop you.”
“Stop me from what?” he asked.
“Leaving.”
He leaned back against the trunk. “Is that what you think I’ll do?”
She let out a sigh and shook her head. “No,” she whispered. “You won’t leave. You’re too honorable. But you’ll want to,” she predicted. “I won’t blame you, Lucas.”
She sounded heartbroken. He had to resist the urge to take her into his arms and comfort her. He knew that if he touched her, he wouldn’t get any of his questions answered tonight, and he’d already vowed neither one of them was going to bed until all his nagging questions had been answered.
“Did you know you were going to raise the twins when you married me?”
“Yes.”
“Did Madam know?”
“Yes.”
“When were you going to tell me about Georgie and Allie?”
“Do you mean in the beginning?”
“Yes.”
She took
a breath. She knew he wasn’t going to like her answer. She’d promised to give the truth, however, and she wasn’t going to break her word. “You weren’t ever supposed to know,” she whispered. “We were going to part in Boston, remember? I was going to take the babies away.”
“Where?”
“I was going to choose a city somewhere in the West. Oh, I had it all figured out, Lucas.” She paused to shake her head over her own foolishness and naivete. “I was going to hire a housekeeper and a cook and try to talk Mrs. Bartlesmith into staying on as their nanny. If she didn’t want to, I was going to hire another qualified woman. I planned to disappear with the twins. Only Madam and I knew George had died. We didn’t tell the rest of the family about the twins’ father.”
He mulled the information over in his mind and then asked, “So you did in fact marry me just to protect your inheritance?”
“No, I married you to protect the twins.”
“Taylor, if I wasn’t ever supposed to know about them, how was I going to protect them?”
His anger and his exasperation were both evident in his voice. She took an instinctive step back.
“You were my safety measure,” she explained. “At the time, even I didn’t fully understand. But Madam did. She insisted I marry you. She’d found out all about you. She had a file the size of a hatbox in her room. She’d gathered quite a bit of information about you and was certain that if I ever needed you to protect the babies, you would be there.”
Lucas had tensed at the mention of the file. “Did you read the information she’d gathered?”
He wasn’t able to keep the worry out of his voice, but reason pushed his initial panic aside. Her grandmother obviously hadn’t had access to his war file. She never would have allowed her granddaughter to marry him if that was the case. There was also the possibility that Travis and his cohorts had softened the truth about him. By the end of the war, he had turned into a combination of a gunfighter and a bounty hunter, but the army hadn’t looked at it quite that way. Hell, they’d given him medals for what they called valor. In Lucas’s mind, killing was killing, and fancy medals couldn’t change that fact. He’d put the medals away and never looked at them again. They were a part of his life he was determined to forget.
Taylor misinterpreted his reaction to her news about the file. She thought he was angry. She couldn’t blame him. Madam had invaded his privacy, and that was terribly wrong, even though her intentions were honorable.
“No, I didn’t read the file. I trusted my grandmother. She told me you were an honorable and courageous man. She even called you a prince among men. I believed her.”
He relaxed against the tree trunk again. Taylor folded her hands together in front of her and turned her gaze to the ground.
“You told me about Redemption. Do you remember?”
“Yes,” he replied. “You asked a lot of questions and I wondered why, but I sure as certain didn’t think you were intending to come here.”
“You said a man could walk for a mile and not see another person. I believed the twins would be safe here. Women have dreams, too,” she added with a nod. “I always dreamed of one day living on the frontier, but I was going to be reasonable. I planned to wait until the twins were older. Then things changed.”
“You needed my help in finding the children.”
“Yes,” she admitted. “And Madam died. She named the twins in her will. I wanted to believe Malcolm wouldn’t look for them. Why would he care? They lived with their father and there wasn’t any money to speak of that he would go after.”
“Your grandmother left a considerable amount for each twin and that made Malcolm curious to find out where they were. Isn’t that right?”
“He’s their legal guardian now. I received two telegrams while I was in Cincinnati. You had already left for Chicago.” She added that piece of information so he wouldn’t think she’d hidden the wires from him.
“Tell me about them,” he ordered when she didn’t immediately continue.
“One was from the banker telling me Malcolm had protested the will. Until the matter is resolved, the money can’t be touched. The other wire came from Malcolm. He knows that the twins’ father is dead. He told me the court had granted him legal custody of the twins and that he was sending an armed escort to bring them home to him.”
Lucas heard the fear in her voice and wanted to take her in his arms again. He forced himself to stay where he was. He was determined to find out everything while his wife was being so agreeable. “Keep explaining, Taylor. I’m listening.”
She couldn’t look at her husband now. She turned around and stared out into the night. Telling family secrets was difficult, but the shame in her family made the explanation almost unbearable. Marian had told her they were never to speak of the atrocity. It was too vile and sinful.
Taylor gripped her hands together and said a prayer for courage. Her voice echoed with sadness when she continued. “I have been running away from my uncle since I was a very little girl. Marian warned me about him. She told me what he would try to do to me. She protected me from the demon.”
She turned around and looked at him. She was searching for signs of disgust. She didn’t find any and decided he still didn’t understand.
“I slept with the dresser in front of my bedroom door from that day on,” she told him. “And I kept a knife under my pillow.”
Lucas closed his eyes. The pain he heard in her voice washed over him. He pictured her as a little girl trying to defend herself against a full-grown man’s sick cravings and started shaking with rage. He shouldn’t have been surprised, for in the time they’d been together, she’d given him sufficient hints. Yes, he had guessed the truth, yet hearing the confirmation still stunned him.
“Did he ever try—”
She wouldn’t let him finish his question. Her words were hurried now, for she was anxious to get the rest of the sins told before weeping.
“The little dresser wasn’t an obstacle for Malcolm, of course. He came into my room late one night. I didn’t wake up until he sat down on the side of the bed. God, I was so terrified. I found the knife under my pillow and when he reached down to cover my mouth with his hand, I cut him.”
She took a long shuttering breath. “He didn’t know I had a weapon, thank God, or he certainly would have been able to take it away from me. I almost blinded him,” she added. “He let out a scream of pain. There was blood everywhere.”
“And then what did you do?” he asked. Lucas kept his voice as soothing as possible. His rage was burning inside him, and it was all he could do not to shout with fury on her behalf.
“I ran and hid under Madam’s bed. She was out for the evening and I remember I didn’t go to sleep until I heard her come into the room. I still don’t know what lie Malcolm told her about the injury.”
“Why didn’t you tell her what happened?”
“How could I?” she cried out. “I felt dirty and ashamed. Such things weren’t discussed in our household. I remember I scratched my knee once and tried to show Madam. She was appalled I would raise my dress in her company. Showing a bit of ankle was shameful and there I was, flaunting my bare legs. Cook cleaned the abrasion.”
Lucas shook his head. Taylor missed the action. She was staring down at her hands now, lost in her own thoughts. “I was trained to be a lady,” she defended. “And ladies did not talk about such vile things. The truth would have killed Madam.”
He didn’t agree. “You do her an injustice, Taylor. She might not have wanted to hear the truth, but she would have done something about it.”
As an adult, Taylor realized Lucas was right. Madam was her champion. She would have protected her and turned her wrath on her son. “Children don’t think like grown-ups,” she said. “At least I didn’t.”
“What about Marian?”
“She couldn’t tell anyone but me. She didn’t feel she could admit that Malcolm had come to her room. Oh, God, I don’t know how long it went on.
She eventually married George, and after the twins were born, she became desperate to leave England and—”
“Malcolm.”
“Yes,” Taylor agreed. “She didn’t want her daughters near him. George wanted to go back home. He wanted to raise his daughters in America.”
She took another step away from him. “Now you know everything,” she said, her tone one of defiance.
“And this is when I’m supposed to leave or want to leave but won’t because I’m so damned honorable?”
She nodded.
He shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere. Come over here, Taylor. I want to hold you.”
She shook her head again, even as she started walking toward him. She burst into tears as soon as he touched her. Lucas held her close and let her cry. He didn’t try to soothe her, for he knew she needed to weep. She’d been carrying a hell of a burden, and it was finally time to let it go. She wasn’t alone any longer. He needed to tell her that as soon as she was able to listen to him.
All the while she was weeping, she was telling him she wasn’t going to be a worry and now that she was safe in the wilderness, he really could leave if he wanted to.
He let her ramble. Long minutes passed before she gained control of her emotions. He didn’t have a handkerchief with him, but he guessed it didn’t matter. She used his shirt to dry her tears.
Taylor leaned against Lucas and considered the problems that were still facing her. Would Malcolm send men all the way to Redemption? She didn’t have an answer and put the question to her husband.
“If he offers enough money, they’ll come.”
“I could go up into the mountains,” she whispered.
“Listen to me,” he ordered. He was careful to keep his voice calm and soothing. He could feel her panic taking hold again. She’d gone rigid in his arms. Her voice was shaking again as well. He wanted her to stay reasonable. “You’re through running.”
“He’s their guardian,” she cried out.
“In England,” he reminded her. “Not here.”
She pushed herself away from him and looked up into his eyes. “Meaning?”
“We’re going to do exactly what he did,” he told her. “We’ll petition our court for legal custody. Their father was American,” he added. “And it was apparent he wanted his daughters raised here. They were living in Boston when he died.”
