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“I have some homework to do.” He extricates himself from her arms and prepares to make a quick escape. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
After he leaves, I’m still thinking about the incident as I help my mom wash the pots and pans. I haven’t done it in a while because I was so busy planning everyone else’s destruction. But it feels good to have this familiar routine. Almost like things are getting back to normal somehow. The only thing that’s changed is me.
“Do you think it bothers Landon’s mom that he’s over here all the time?” I ask as she hands me a pan to dry.
My mom scrubs a spatula for way too long, her eyes shining with sadness. She definitely knows more than she’s let onto.
“I’m not really sure, honey.”
“Is there something you aren’t telling me?” I turn to study her, hoping I can get her to open up.
Mom shakes her head. “No, it’s not that. But you know how people are in this town. I’ve heard a few stories about her from some of the other moms who grew up with her. The way they tell things, it just seems like maybe she’s not the nicest person.”
“What kind of stories?” I prop my hip against the counter and watch as she continues to scrub.
“A few people have mentioned that she’s never really been able to pull herself together enough to be a good parent.” Mom’s voice lowers like she’s too ashamed to say the words out loud. “There are rumors that she’s a heavy drinker, and maybe some other things. I don’t know, Kail. I just think he needs someone in his life to let him know they care about him without any ulterior motive. That poor boy has been through hell growing up in the spotlight. Having his every move criticized and dissected. I can’t imagine the damage that must have caused him as a child. You can see it in his eyes. He acts like everything is fine, but deep down, I think he’s lonely and hurt.”
My throat feels tight when I nod, and here comes that reaction I hate so much. It’s almost an automatic response for me. I can’t watch those sad children commercials or any kind of true crime stories. I start blubbering on sight because I’m an emotional wreck. When I think back to the first time I met Landon, I know what my mom says is true. I’d never seen anyone so… damaged. It was there in his eyes, and I think it still is. He’s just gotten better at hiding it.
“He’s lucky to have you in his corner.” I hug my mom, squeezing her tighter than ever.
“He’s lucky to have all of us.” She smiles back at me, completely unaware that my only intention was to destroy him.19KailaniAfter I slip out the door, I’m trudging back to the pool house when I stop in the middle of the lawn. I don’t want to go back in there. I know how it will go if I do. I’ll spend the entire night overthinking things. Landon stopped sneaking in to sleep on the lounger a couple of days ago, and it feels so empty and quiet in there now. It feels lonely, and I can only imagine how lonely his huge house must be. Is that why he always says yes to the parties, even though he appears to hate them? Is it just so he has people there to fill the cavernous space?
What does he do when he goes home? Does he just sit there by himself, waiting until the next dinner at our house?
My pulse slows as I pivot in that direction to look. He’s probably busy. He said he has homework. I shouldn’t even wonder what he’s doing at all. But that little truth doesn’t stop me from venturing over the property line. I head for the front of his house, but as soon as I round the corner, I’m startled by the woman on the stairs. She’s pounding her fist on the door, screaming at Landon to let her in. She sounds drunk, and I recognize the stringy hair and skinny legs. She’s the same woman from the party who was giving blowies to Landon’s football buddies.
“Open up, you prick!” she yells. “I know you’re in there.”
I’m too stunned to move. And for a second, I’m glad she hasn’t noticed me because my eyes are nearly bugging out of my head as I watch her completely lose her shit. All the things my mother said she heard about this woman are starting to appear painfully true.
I’m not sure how old she is, but her face is puckered like an old rotten lemon. Her hair is ratty and knotted and tinged with brassy streaks and what I think might be dirt. The expletives fly from her mouth in a raspy way that sounds like she’s smoked so many cigarettes, her lungs are about to give out. She doesn’t look like a woman who has her shit together. I can’t even imagine her raising a child. How did he ever survive?
