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“I’m not saying you’re into it, but …” He releases his hold on me and takes a step back, giving me space, and I’m thankful because I need it to process what he’s telling me. “If you ever feel the need to be between us, let me know,” he says as the corner of his mouth ticks upward.
“You mean? Both of you … would … I mean …” My brows furrow, but I’m most certainly not confused. I’m taken back to that night. The one that ruined everything. I’ve experimented before, much to my dismay at how the story had been leaked to the press.
Ahren nods. “Yes.”
“I don’t know. I mean ...” Crossing my arms in front of my chest, I regard him through narrowed eyes, wondering if he knows about my past as wariness takes hold.
But then he continues, “Hey, don’t knock it till you’ve tried it. That’s my life’s motto.” He winks at me playfully, and I can’t help but grin. Ahren has bad boy written all over him, and I know he’d make any girl happy. The thought of him and Elian wanting me does make my heart skip a few beats.
“Is that what you tell all the girls?” I tease, trying to steer away from me and more toward him and his past. Even though the thought of it makes my body ache, I push all those thoughts to the back of my mind and focus on the present moment.
“Nah, I just give them my pretty smile and they fall to their knees.” He chuckles. “I mean, how can you say no to this?” His teasing eases the tension, and I can’t help but laugh as well.
I roll my eyes. “Yeah, yeah.” In an attempt to move the conversation, I ask, “Tell me about you, him, and your family. Since you know about my feelings for you and him, I’d like to know more about you both.”
“Well, let’s sit. I can tell you about me, but he needs to be the one to answer your questions about his life.” He motions for the boulder that overlooks the city. Ahren helps me up and then hops onto the smooth stone beside me. “I lost my parents when I was a child. My mom worked for Elian’s folks, and it was natural for them to take me in,” he tells me, causing my head to snap in his direction.
“I’m so sorry.”
“No need to be sorry. I grew up with a good family,” he says, but he doesn’t look at me. “It’s one of those times when you want to feel sad, but they gave me something I never thought I’d have—a chance at a future. And then his dad …” His words taper off into nothing, the silence hanging heavy around us.
“His dad …?”
Ahren stares out across the vista, his jaw ticking as he grinds his teeth. Shit. I always put my foot in it. I shouldn’t have asked, but I can’t help wanting to know about him. And his brother.
“He was killed. That ain’t my story to tell though.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I think it’s best you talk to Elian about his folks.” There’s a sadness in his words. It’s raw and painful. “He likes you. I haven’t seen him so torn up about a woman before.”
“I’m hardly a woman.” I don’t at all think I am. I’m nineteen, repeating my senior year, and I’m still reeling from the past. Being an adult is hard, and I wish I could be a little girl with my mom and dad making all my decisions.
“That’s how we both see you. I think if he could swap places with me right now, he would,” Ahren says, and that’s when he glances over his shoulder at me.
“Why didn’t he ask me then?” I question. It’s whispered, but Ahren is sitting close to me, so I know he heard.
“My brother isn’t the easiest person to be around, and he thought I would be able to explain it better. I do like you, ever since I first saw you.” There’s a rawness in his words, a truth I wasn’t expecting.
“Ahren, this is strange. I feel like I’m a pawn in a game being shifted back and forth over the chessboard. It’s as if you’re toying with me by kissing me and then expecting me to be okay with Elian wanting me.” Even as I say the words, I wonder if I mean them. Because if I had to be honest, I did like kissing Ahren. He’s the epitome of tall, dark, and handsome as well as being inked from shoulder to wrist, and I do like him. “I just … I don’t know how this will work. I mean emotionally I’m already a mess.”
This time, he chuckles, shaking his head as he loops his arm around my neck to pull me closer to him. “It’s going to be okay,” he tells me. “I’m sorry I kissed you. I really should’ve waited, perhaps explained before I did that. And I’m really sorry for being an asshole and just making you feel like you’re some chess piece, because you’re not.” He presses a chaste kiss to my cheek. “I do like you. And so does Elian. You’ve told me you want him, which is fine. But I do want to be friends. I could be the big brother you never had.”
