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I couldn’t help thinking back to the boy he’d been. The signs had been there, hadn’t they? The way he was so ready to fight anyone he thought was messing with me, like the boys who had made me fall off my bike. Except back then he’d fought to protect. Now… now he was so full of rage that he fought to fight. There was nothing noble about it.
Unless his explosion on the field was about the party.
I frowned, heart still pounding as they finally got the players back under control on the field.
Was that all because of me? It should’ve only made me feel disgusted, but there was a little twinge of excitement, only because it would mean the old Cassian wasn’t completely gone.
After the game, Zoe caught up with me and tried to help me find a ride home. Stupidly, I told her it was okay—that I’d figure it out.
As soon as she was gone, I realized I should’ve accepted her help. I didn’t recognize most of the faces making their way into the parking lot, and I didn’t know anyone well enough to text and ask.
I paced in circles, trying to decide what to do until nearly everyone had left. Everyone except the football team.
I saw the Parker team come filing out of Calvary High after they’d showered and changed. Most of the team hopped on a charter bus, but a few seemed to be heading to their own cars.
Tristan Blackwood picked up Kennedy in his arms and planted a kiss on the top of her head. She’d been waiting on the curb for him, and he carried her as she laughed and swatted at him. He tucked her into the passenger seat of an expensive looking sports car, then yelled something vulgar to Logan, who was tossing a bag of equipment into the back of his beat-up truck.
I realized I was standing by a well-lit tree in the parking lot, staring like a creeper. I tried to pretend I was looking at my phone, but Cassian was already walking toward me.
Shit.
I turned and started walking the other way. I had no idea where I was going, or what I thought I could pretend to be doing but running from him was a natural instinct.
“Need a ride, Scarface?” Cassian’s deep voice boomed from behind me.
I stopped, swallowed, then looked at my phone. “I have a friend coming to get me.”
“Yeah? Then you won’t mind if I wait with you until they get here, will you?”
I stiffened, following his movements like a deer might follow a huge wolf as it loped into a clearing. “Actually, I would mind.”
Making no sign that he heard me or cared, Cassian slung his bag off his powerful shoulder and let it thump to the ground. He patted the grass next to him and gestured for me to sit. He had an irritated patch of red under his eye and a vertical slit of blood on his lower lip from his scuffle on the field.
“I’ll stand, thanks.”
He chuckled. “How long do you plan to pretend, exactly?”
“That I can be around you without vomiting? Keep following me and we’ll probably find out.”
“I’ll give you credit for one thing. You’ve got backbone.”
“Is it that shocking to you? That people stand up to you when you’re vile?”
“Vile,” he said the word like he was tasting it, rolling it around his mouth to see how he liked it. “Yes, actually. It is. They usually try to suck my cock, no matter what ‘vile’ shit comes out of my mouth.”
“Charming. And does saying stuff like that usually impress people?”
“You mean you’re not impressed yet?” He rolled his head to the side and took me in with a gaze that dared me to look away. “Give me thirty minutes alone with you and I’m pretty sure I could change that.”
I folded my arms and fought the need to press my thighs together. There was no denying what my body wanted. It was ready to swallow up every last dirty promise he let past those full lips. I needed to change the subject. I could feel the momentum of him, like he was gaining speed and I was rapidly losing control. A few more seconds of talk like that, and God only knew what I’d wind up doing and regretting.
I moved and sat beside him, only to show him I wasn’t afraid. I could trust myself within arm’s reach, and I wasn’t going to keep cowering. As soon as I sat, I felt suddenly much less sure. Talk, Charli. Use your words. “So which is it? You want to ruin my life, or you want to sleep with me?” Well, shit. That wasn’t the way I intended to use my words.
Cassian cocked a dark eyebrow. “At first? I only wanted to make you regret coming back here.” He gave a shrug, as if what he was about to say wasn’t really of consequence. “But then I looked in the mirror. What better way to fuck up someone’s life then letting them fall for me?”
