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“Well, he does now,” she replies. “And you have a killer car.”

“Where should we go first?” I check the time on the dash. “We lost the morning to car shopping.”

“Let’s go to the market last,” she says, referring to Pike’s Place Market. “I’ll want fresh flowers, and they won’t survive in the car.”

“Good call. Me, too. Retail therapy then?”

“Hell, yes.” She shimmies in the seat. “I told Mark I was about to do some serious damage to the credit card.”

“Does he care about stuff like that?”

“Not really, I just like to torment him.” She points to the parking garage under Nordstrom. “I’d park in there. It’s central and safe.”

“Perfect.”

Once we’re parked and inside the building, it’s like Christmas. We walk through all of the luxury shops: Louis Vuitton, Chanel, and Gucci among others. I find a gorgeous bag in Chanel but leave without it, deciding to think about it.

“I don’t know why you passed that up,” Meredith says as she sips on her Starbucks, holding her own Louis Vuitton shopping bag. “It’s seriously so you.”

“I know, but I also liked the bag in Gucci.”

She raises a brow. “Star, I don’t know if you know this, but you can afford it.”

I cringe. “I know, but it seems self-indulgent.”

“You just came off a thirteen-month tour where you worked yourself into exhaustion.” She shakes her head. “Seriously, if you want to buy the damn bags, buy them. All of them. Enjoy them.”

I’m watching her, soaking in what she’s saying. “Why am I so bad at rewarding myself for a job well done?”

“Oh, you don’t have time for that level of therapy.” She sips her drink. “I could sit here and list twenty reasons just off the top of my head.”

“I never used to have a hard time spoiling myself.”

“That was before,” she says quietly, watching me with those big blue eyes. “Since then, you’ve done nothing but punish yourself.”

I think about Levi, that night after the show and yesterday, and feel a smile slowly spread over my face.

“You’re holding out on me,” she says, grabbing my arm. “Spill it. Right now. Or I won’t be your friend anymore.”

“Liar.” I laugh and sip my frap as we walk back toward Nordy’s and the shops where I’ve decided to spend a ridiculous amount of money. “You’d never desert me. You love me too much.”

“Okay, that’s true,” she concedes. “But you have to tell me.”

“Well, you’re right in that I’ve carried guilt. I’m still carrying it, but I think it’s fading a bit over time.”

“Get to the good stuff.”

“You’re so impatient.” I laugh as I hold the door open for her, and we walk into the blessedly air-conditioned building. “And this is not a conversation to be had while I buy out Chanel.”

“Later then. In the car. I need to know everything.”

“Deal.”

I walk to the sales associate who was helping us earlier and smile.

“You’re back,” she says warmly. I like her. She never made a fuss about who I am, even though I could see in her eyes from the minute we walked in that she recognized me.

“We are,” I agree and point to the bag that caught my eye. “And I’ve come back for her.”

“It’s such a great piece to add to your collection,” she says with a smile and reaches in a cupboard for one that hasn’t been on display.

“But that’s not all.” I smile at Mer, who nods in support. “There’s another one over here that I think I need to have.”

“Well, let’s take a look then,” she says with a broad smile.

Yes, we’re about to make her day.

Two hours and thousands of dollars later, we’re walking to the car, loaded down with bags and smiles.

“We shouldn’t leave these in the car while we walk to the market,” Mer says and frowns.

“Definitely not,” I agree and click my fob to unlock the doors. The car is small, so fitting all of the bags and boxes in the backseat is a challenge, but they fit.

And I’ve broken out in a sweat.

“Maybe we should skip the market today,” I suggest. “We can always go another day.”

“That’s true because you’re going to be here for three months.”

Meredith hurries around the car and launches herself into my arms, holding me tightly.

“Whoa. This is a lot of affection, Mer.” But I hug her back, rocking us both side to side. “But I don’t hate it.”

“I just love you so much, and I’m happy you’re here,” she gushes. “I love shopping with you, and seeing you whenever I want to.”

“It’s fun.” I kiss her cheek, then slap her ass. “Now, get in the car, and let’s go.”

“You’re such a softie,” she says with a laugh and does as she’s told, dropping into the passenger seat. We pull out of the parking garage and head to the freeway, back toward Mer’s house, which is in the opposite direction of mine.

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