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“I’ve never been so disappointed in a mini bar,” I murmur, bowing my head.
“Really?” She laughs. “Isn’t that the golden rule of traveling on a budget? Avoid cheap hotel minibars?” she teases.
“I guess I wouldn’t know, not with all the five-star luxury I have to put up with,” I boast. “I’m guessing room service isn’t an option?”
“Oh, be careful.”
She points at the floor, just below where I’m standing. Frowning, I look down, but there’s nothing there.
“I’d hate for all that blood on your hands to mess up the carpet.”
I laugh, embarrassed I actually fell for that. I give the mini bar a chance to redeem itself by reaching for a candy bar. I wince as I unwrap it, because I’m pretty sure Hershey bars aren’t supposed to be white. I examine the packaging and laugh. It’s three years out of date. I give up and walk over to the bed and sit down.
“Maybe I should take your phone as collateral .” I smirk. “Just to make sure you don’t run off with the car or something.”
She glowers at me, then reaches for her bag. She grabs her purse and pulls out her license, thrusting it in my face.
“That’s the only collateral you’re getting from me,” she says.
I take it from her and study it. The photo is a few years old and quite unflattering. She frowns at me when I laugh.
“You look like you’re standing in a crowded elevator, and you’ve just let one go,” I explain
“Hey.”
She tries her best to look annoyed by my comment, but her lips curve into an unwilling smile. She scoots closer to study the photo, her arm brushing past my leg. I shiver, too busy watching her face as she laughs to read much into my reaction, but I can’t deny there’s a spark there.
“Actually, it’s fine.” I hand it back to her. “I just remembered I still have …” I smirk at her. “Something else.”
“What—”
The confusion on her face lifts. She glares at me. Her eyes flash, but I swear I see amusement hiding in there too.
“You forwarded it to yourself, didn’t you?” she hisses.
“Of course I did.” I shrug, like there was no other option. “The idea that you wrote that for me when you were fourteen is fucking adorable. It’s even cuter than the GIF Julian sent me last week of a mouse putting on a tiny sweater.”
She stares at me, her expression alternating between anger and curiosity.
“He actually puts the sweater on?”
I nod. “All by himself. You’re dying to see it, aren’t you?”
I raise my eyebrows and nod, but she shrugs like she doesn’t care. She totally does, though. Finally she sighs.
“Just show me the mouse.”
I laugh and reach for my phone. It’s been off all day, so it takes a couple of moments for it start up. I kept it off while driving because I was paranoid about someone calling Frederick. I got away with it once, but I’d have a hard time convincing her a second time. I check my messages first. I frown when an alert pops up.
Voicemail full.
How the fuck is it full?
I call through to my messages, sure it’s just a computer error, but it’s not. I have twenty-nine new messages waiting for me. I click play, distracted by Katie, who starts laughing uncontrollably. When the first message starts to play, I narrow my eyes at her.
“Hey Adam, this is Darren. I’m six four, two hundred pounds,nice and hairy, just like you requested. I’ve never really done much involving manual anal stimulation, but I’m always up for new experiences.” He laughs nervously. “Anyway, photos are coming. With any luck, you will be too. Give me a call and we’ll set something up.”
I stare at my phone in shock.
Manual anal stimulation?
What the fuck was that?
“Is something wrong?” Katie’s voice shakes.
I narrow my eyes, because she can’t even look at me.
“You did this,” I accuse her.
“What?” She winks at me. “You can’t take a joke?”
“Really?” I chuckle, because she has no idea what she’s unleashing. “You know you’re going to regret this, right?”
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I just played you like a violin.” She giggles, like she’s pretty proud of herself. “
Maybe you’re the one who’ll regret it?”
I laugh, because I’m kind of impressed. I never would’ve thought she’d have the nerve to pull something like this off. To be honest, it’s kind of turning me on.
“So, do you want to tell me what you did?”
“I put an ad for you on Craigslist.” She leans back against the pillows, her eyes dancing. She grabs her phone. “Here.”
I read the ad aloud.
“Male. Twenty-six, seeking another male for adventurous fun times. I’m into risk taking and sexual gratification—bonus points if we do them together. Specific interests in pegging, bootlegging and anal stimulation. My ideal man is well-built, hairy and at least ten inches.”
