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Not able to resist, I turn in his arms. It’s dark in my room, so I can’t see him, but I feel his hot breath as it brushes across my face. His hand lands on my hip, pulling me to his chest. “We said slow,” I murmur.
“You said slow,” he replies softly.
“Coop,” I breathe.
“Just let me hold you, baby.”
His softly spoken request in the middle of the night is impossible to resist. Resting my head against his chest, I can feel his heart beating. His arms are locked tight around me, and it’s perfect. It’s everything I ever imagined it could be, and I don’t know how I’m going to be able to resist him. I don’t know what I was thinking. How could I possibly believe I could keep my heart safe? It’s never been safe when it comes to Cooper. I gave my heart to him years ago, and he still has it. He will always have it.
“I missed you, Reese. So fucking much. I was starting to wonder if there would ever be a time I would get to have you all to myself again.”
I pull away, but he doesn’t let me get far, sliding his arm under my head and letting me use him as a pillow. “Tell me about football.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Everything. I feel so disconnected from your life.”
“This last year was hard. Painfully hard. I knew I would miss you, but I never could have imagined the depth of that void. I never want to go through that again. I can’t do it. I won’t survive it.”
“That’s pretty dramatic,” I say, teasing and trying to lighten the mood.
“I’m serious,” he says, his voice strong. “I was miserable without you. It wasn’t until I got your wedding invitation in the mail that I realized what an idiot I’d been. I had the most amazing woman right in front of me for years, and let my fear keep me from her.”
“I was scared too.”
“Not that night in my room. You were fearless offering yourself to me. I wish I could explain to you how hard it was for me to stop us that night. I was certain it would ruin our friendship, and I knew I needed you in my life. I was just too blinded by the fear to realize that we could be more than just best friends.” He leans in and, somehow in the darkness, his lips find my forehead. “I didn’t realize we could be everything,” he says tenderly.
“I feel like I’m dreaming.”
“Yeah?” he asks. “Good dream or nightmare?”
“The best dream,” I confess.
“You’re my dream.”
I can’t explain what his words do to me. It almost feels as though my body is melting into his as I relax into his hold. His words put me at ease and have my heart leaping from my chest.
“Football,” I prompt.
“I like the team. The guys are great.”
“Come on, Coop, you can do better than that.”
“To be honest, I was in a haze most of the season. I went to practice and gave my all there and at games, but socially, I didn’t do a lot. I had a few guys from the team over a few times, doing my part to fit in, but I spent most of my time in the gym. I was missing you like crazy, in a new city all alone, and I just threw myself into my job.”
“It shows,” I say, resting my hand on his chest.
“Don’t tempt me, baby,” he says, swatting my ass playfully. “What about you? How’s work?”
“I like my job, but there is a lot of government red tape we have to go through. There’s a lot I didn’t get to see during my externship. I just want to help people. There was this woman… hell, she’s my age. She came into the office. She’s a nurse’s aide and a single mom. The dad is not in the picture and gives her no financial support. Anyway, health insurance is expensive, her deductible is outrageous, and her son, who’s four, has asthma. She was trying to get the medical card to help offset the deductible. She’s struggling to buy his meds and make ends meet. I helped her submit for financial assistance, a medical card, anything to help lessen the burden. She made five dollars too much. Can you believe that? Five dollars kept her from getting the assistance she needed to keep her head above water. I hate it. It’s so hard to tell them that news. I thought being a social worker, I was going to get to help people, help make a difference in their lives, and it’s been the exact opposite so far.”
“I’m sorry.” He places another soft kiss on my forehead.
“Well, I’m glad one of us has our dream job.”
“Maybe it’s just working for the county. Are there other avenues, places you can work that you can feel more fulfilled?”
