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She hums against my shaft and takes me all the way to the back of her throat, sucking so hard that my body shudders from the pleasure.

“That’s it, baby, suck that cock and make your man come,” I croon, watching her.

The entire time, all I can think is that there’s no way I’ll be able to be without her for a solid fucking month.EllieI stare at the calendar with a sick feeling in my stomach. It’s been three weeks and I’m nowhere close to ready to move to Tennessee. That’s not going to make Liam happy. Honestly, it doesn’t make me happy. There’s just so much going on and I can’t see any way around it all.

If I want to be brutally honest, there’s a part of me putting off going back because I’m afraid. I can’t explain that to Liam. He wouldn’t understand and I can’t explain it to him. If I did that…He might hate me.

I look at my bedside clock. It’s almost midnight. Liam was supposed to call at eleven. He said he was doing some things for Devil tonight though, and might be late. Our last conversation was kind of stilted. Mostly because I haven’t given him a concrete answer on what day I’ll be heading that way. I hate that I’m putting him through this.

I hate that I’m putting myself through it.

As the minutes tick by, I get this sick feeling in my stomach. There’s every chance in the world that he won’t call tonight. I can’t even blame him. I know I’m going to have to go back soon. I can’t truly give Liam up and staying here out of fear isn’t helping either of us. I don’t want to lose him because I’m being a coward. I roll over on the bed and punch my pillow in frustration. I had forgotten how lonesome my bed was without Liam in it. There’s a lot I’d forgotten… like how I feel half alive without him.

I bolt upright when the phone rings, reaching over to grab it immediately.

“Hi, sweetheart,” I murmur immediately, feeling a wave of relief push through me.”

“Hey, Ice.” His voice is gruff and I know immediately that tonight’s conversation is going to go a lot like last night’s.

“I was afraid you weren’t going to call.”

“Would you have missed me if I didn’t?” he asks. I let out a breath, as a wave of sadness hits me.

“Of course I would have, Liam. I miss you every day. I hate being away from you.” I pray that he can hear the sincerity in my voice. I’m not so sure he’s looking for it, though.

“If you say so.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that you say you don’t like being away from me, but here we are apart and that’s on you, Ellie.”

“Why does it have to all be on me?” I ask, immediately defensive.

“Don’t start that shit, Ellie. We had this settled before I left there.”

“You mean that you had it settled.”

“You can’t twist this around, Ellie. You said you’d be here in a month. That month is fast approaching and you’re nowhere near ready to come home.”

“Liam, you have to understand—”

“I’ve been trying to understand, Ice. I really have. I’m tired of being alone.”

“Don’t you think I am, too?” I ask him, and I close my eyes because suddenly I just feel…defeated.

“I don’t know what you are, Ellie. You’re the one choosing to stay there. It doesn’t matter what I say, you’re just…Fuck, I don’t know what you’re doing.”

“Liam, I want to be with you, I do. It’s just. The police want to question Dawn again. Not to mention, the manager Harvey hired screwed shit up. I’m trying to fix up all of his alcohol orders, while interviewing new applicants. It’s just not a good time to move right now.”

“You said your sister won’t even talk to you.”

“Well, she’s not. But, I don’t want her to go there by herself. She needs someone to have her back.”

“And why does that have to be your job again, Ellie?”

“Liam, she’s my sister.”

“I get family loyalty, babe. I have that in spades, but if you don’t get that loyalty back, then you sure as fuck don’t kill yourself to give it.”

“She’s just going through a lot. She just lost someone she loves in a very violent way,” I murmur, but even as I say it, I’m not convinced that’s what is going on. I don’t think the police think that’s all that’s going on either, but despite looking extremely hard, they can’t find proof to the contrary.

“Bullshit, Ellie,” he all but snarls.

“What?” I ask, completely shocked. I know he’s upset, but this…

“Your sister has always been like this. She acts like the world revolves around her and everyone is supposed to stop whatever they’re doing to run to her aid.”

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